Agreed to a date I don't want to go on...

[.Poppy.]

I'll just jump into this...hopefully you guys can give me some guidance :)

I was working last night and ended up working with a guy I don't know who doesn't usually work there. Work wasn't very hard, so we mostly just hung out. He seemed nice enough, and at the end of the night asked for my number. He also suggested we go out sometime this weekend to local bars, with my friends (I told him I often go out on the weekends).

I thought he was nice, but wasn't interested *that way* in him. However, I didn't know how to tell him no. I suppose I also have somewhat low self-esteem and figure that I should count myself lucky to have someone interested in me.

He's been texting me all day long and I can't answer. I can't go. I have been having a really tough time, and a really tough year, and don't think I can handle it. On top of it all, my Lab mix is currently very, very sick with bone cancer and liver failure and we'll probably be putting her down this weekend. I lost my Sheltie to kidney failure just this last February, so honestly I am just absolutely spent.

I don't know how to say it, as I don't want to upset the guy and I don't want it to look like I'm dodging him or being mean, as he genuinely seemed to like me and I may run into him again. But I just...can't. What do I do?

[Sam100322]

It's best to be honest from the start even if it sounds harsh just tell him I'm really sorry but I don't want anything at the moment. Rather then drag it out.

[Oosh]

Aw I'm really sorry about your dogs. I love dogs. I had 3 boxers.

I think you save yourself grief in the long run by just being honest. Just say you're not up to it at the moment but thanks for the invitation.

[mark84]

Be honest with him, there's no need for him to be upset, you can say you're flattered but it's just not the right time for you.
I'm so so sorry to hear about your dog, take care of yourself.

[Rennie1989]

I would say that I was having a girls only night out, guys seem to buy it ;)

[yiannis]

Hello! Sorry to hear about your dogs. Staying with your dog in her final moments should be your priority right now. If I were you, I would tell him the truth, that I had to stand by my dog but nobody stops you from seeing this guy some other time, maybe next weekend, if you feel like it. Never lose a chance, even if you are not romantically attracted to him at first, you never know what life has in store for you. Giving him a chance over a date might make him into a man you never suspected he could become :)

[.Poppy.]

Thanks. I sent him a message and he was really nice about it.

He has the same name as my father, so that's kind of a weird roadblock for me :). But we'll see where it goes.

My dog actually passed away yesterday. It was looking bad so we were taking her to the vet and she died about a mile from the vet's office. I'm recovering from it, so I'm having some ups and downs.

[MyNameIsTerry]

Really sorry to hear that Poppy.

She must have been in a lot of pain to die on the way but at least you were all there to give her comfort.

Whilst it might be painful now, she is no longer suffering.:bighug1:

[lafemme]

Very sorry to hear about your pup.

Just let him down gently, explain the situation and I'm sure he will respect you and understand.

If he reacts badly, he's not the type of person you want in your life!

[.Poppy.]

Thanks.

He ended up texting me again on Saturday asking if I was going out. I told him no, that I had had a rough year and that I just needed some time. His response was "well, just let me know".

I do feel a bit bad, being that I've had such disappointment lately I feel bad disappointing someone else because I know how it feels. Though I still can't understand why he'd be all that interested. But, I don't owe him anything and I do need some time to focus on myself.

[MyNameIsTerry]

It seems a bit insensitive to ask you out again after a day when he should know you are upset because your dog died.

Is he perhaps a bit needy? Or perhaps doesn't really understand how this could make you feel, perhaps a bit immature?

He obviously likes you Poppy. From reading your posts you seem like a nice, friendly, caring & genuine person so why wouldn't he like you?

[mark84]

Sorry to hear about your dog passing Poppy, that's so sad. Take care

[.Poppy.]

Mark84 and MyNameIsTerry - thank you. You are both very kind :)

I'd bet on immature but he could be needy as well. I just don't think it's going to happen because we barely know each other and I don't think I'll be ready for awhile so he'll likely lose interest but hopefully he's not too upset.