Discrimination has made my HA worse!!!

[Andy699]

So, I know that many of you know about the Facebook page of this group during it's reconstruction. However I was subjected to abuse for just putting a kiss (x) at the end of a sentence!

I commented on a post to give support and I was subjected to a barrage of abuse from this guy just for putting a kiss on the end of a sentence. His exact words were "I guess you're gay, just want you to know that I feel uncomfortable with you putting a kiss"

I'd just like to say.... OMFG! We are all on here to support one another. No matter what race, gender, age, religion, or sexual orientation.

I'm sorry but are we not living in the 21'st century. I was already freaking out tonight and it's just made my HA 100 times worse!

We are all here to support each other!

I don't know whether to be angry or upset... :ohmy:

[MyNameIsTerry]

Was it him that you posted your comment to? If so, could it be that he has misinterpreted the "x"? Could it be a cultural thing? Maybe it touched a nerve with him because of something you couldn't know about beforehand because you wouldn't have done it?

I'm not saying its wrong by the way, just that without more detail, as an outsider, there could be more to it.

[tan235]

Don't be either! Who cares? Just don't offer him anymore advice and if you do next time put two xx's!!!

It's really not your concern - his concern that you might be gay.
So what if you are or aren't?!

He obviously is an un-evolved human being suffering from more than HA.

Don't worry about it!
Trust me!
Here xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[MyNameIsTerry]

You did nothing wrong anyway Andy. All you can do is explain your intentions.

Something to remember though is that sometimes those we are speaking may be very anxious and this distorts how we see things and we end up acting irrationally. I've snapped at people which is out of character for me and by snap I really mean have a go.

So, if you have explained yourself and feel justified in your actions, perhaps its just best to put it out of your mind because you don't want to spend hours ruminating oevr it as it will just further feed your anxiety levels.

I'm not going to judge this either way, I wasn't there, I don't know all the facts or both sides so maybe its just a misunderstanding that ended up an argument. Sometimes it can be easy to offend people, especially sensitive people, with the written word since there is no emotional element as there would be in a verbal communication.

Maybe you add "x" to all your posts and thats because you are comfortable with it. Some guys are happy to be emotional or show their feelings with other guys, maybe hug or kiss each other. However, some people are not comfortable with it and may react badly.

Personally, if you did it to me I wouldn't respond that way...part of me would be just thinking about your helpful post and another secret part of me would be thinking "Still got it buddy" and I'm heterosexual.

Vent it on here and move on from it so it doesn't make your anxiety worse. Just one of those Andy.

[Andy699]

Thank you so much tan235!! I thought I was going mad because everyone was telling me not to worry about it but at the end of the day i'm only here to post my worries and to give people advice based on my experiences. So f***ing what if I put a kiss. I do it to everone lol.. To be honest, I don't give a s*** if you're black, white, gay, lesbian, jewish, muslim, old, young etc... I'm just here to get advice and to help people out. Thank god there's one decent person out there who understands :) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx (Btw, the kisses don't mean I'm hitting on you lol!) xx

---------- Post added at 04:31 ---------- Previous post was at 04:19 ----------

No, I understand that but he was from the UK! My HA is enough to worry about and I understand what you are all saying but I'm not going to be subjected to abuse because i'm gay... So what?! I put a kiss on every single one of my posts and now I'm not even going to bother because I'm scared of retaliation. I get really stressed but I would NEVER say something about their personal status. It's just not right :( x

[tan235]

You're welcome!
Some people just have real problems and you met one today.
If anything feel sorry for him!
Also how lovely of you to respond.
Having HA is bloody difficult and exhausting - without support from others we would all go insane!!
xxx - oh no 3 kisses - that's x rated!

[MyNameIsTerry]

I didn't know you were gay Andy, besides it makes no difference to me.

Some people may not appreciate it and all you can do is respect their wishes in the future or give them a wide berth if you don't want to have any involvement with them.

Sometimes things go like this on social media. I've had it on forums myself but its important to take a step back, examine whether you have acted in the way you would expect and correct anything you may have done wrong or could have done better and its really important to not let it get to you or it just drives your anxiety.

I understand where you are coming from to.

[Andy699]

Thank you tan325 and MyNameIsTerry... I honestly don't think I said anything to offend him though... tan325 is it OK if I private message you? :) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[tan235]

Was it my 3 xx's!
Ha ha of course! Pm me :)

[Andy699]

It deffo was ;) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[MyNameIsTerry]

Its getting a bit warm in this thread! :D

[Fishmanpa]

I have a profile on FB. I rarely post anything other than the gigs I'm playing. Other than that I don't take it seriously at all. It's a joke and not real life whatsoever. And remember, one click and you can block someone from seeing you. Easy Peasy ;)

Positive thoughts

[Rennie1989]

Ow Crikey, I saw that thread too. I really don't know what to say about it.

[luc]

Is there a NMP Facebook page ?