Anxiety is so on and off. Any advice or tips?

[Charlotteee89]

Hey guys!

I've been going through a moderate anxiety bout over the last few days, I think what's caused it is the fact that I'm ill with tonsillitis and er, the time of the month (sorry male readers!) and the fact that me and ex boyfriend broke up a few weeks ago and I'm really starting to miss him now and what doesn't help is that I booked 3 days off work this week purposely so we could spend time together but obviously now as we've broken up, I won't be with him, so I feel pretty rubbish about that. I also get anxiety over being stuck at home too long (I had a bad panic attack months ago, at home, at night so my anxiety likes to associate my home with feeling panicky and claustrophobic) and so I'm getting anxious and stressy over the fact I now don't have plans!

It's so difficult to deal with anxiety when you think you're doing okay for a few days or even weeks and then BAM it arrives again and you struggle to control your thoughts.

Any advice on how to deal with this latest bout? I can sometimes override my bouts but I'm just wanting to know if anyone else has any useful tips or advice on what works and helps them, to see if I could use that to help me. :)

[chickpea]

It's not surprising you're feeling low, given what you've said about your boyfriend and being ill. If you can accept there is a reason for how you're feeling, you might feel less anxious.
I think the more we examine why we are better some days than others, the more we feel anxious - acceptance is key. If you don't fear bad days, you won't be so quick to notice them and they won't be so bad.

Can you plan something you love for your days off? Even something small like buying a glossy magazine, or having a coffee with a friend, or a long bath and your favourite tv programme. The worst way to spend them would be trying to imagine what you'd be doing if your boyfriend was still around.
Have a plan - just feeling in control will help.x

[jonjones]

Hey,
Im sorry to hear youre having a difficult time. Lots of things are happening to you, it would make anyone feel down!
Try to take it one day at a time and remind yourself that this will pass!
Jon :)

[Charlotteee89]

I'm still pretty ill, so organising or doing anything is going to be pretty hard. And my work friends (I have a few outside-of-work friends but we're all not talking as we've had a falling out) work awkward shifts or aren't free. It doesn't help that I can't legally drive yet. So I'm a bit stuck tbh. I probably just need to embrace my independence.

It doesn't help that I see my ex at work most days, so every time I see him I can't help but look at him and sigh. Why do I find him so much more attractive now? Ugh! We're 'friends' and still talking via text, a tiny bit of me hopes that he'll suggest doing something as we'd said we'd still hang out even though we've broken up but I don't think it'll happen, I don't know how he really feels about everything. I just miss him, not the boyfriend-y stuff really, just speaking and hanging out with him in person, his presence I suppose.

It's hard to feel positive when I'm so drained from being ill. :weep:

[Josh21]

As others suggested, make some plans so you are not at home longer than you want to be. Hopefully that will be possible when you feel better.
I guess being ill and breaking up with your bf hitting you at the same time has made your anxiety really high. Hopefully once you feel better the anxiety will decrease. Its hard that you see your bf each day but that may decrease also especially if you are more social as it seems you miss the social aspect of the relationship like hanging out etc. If you fill that void things should get better.