Natreturns
03-10-14, 09:01
Hello everyone,
I don't really know where to start but here goes.
I was diagnosed with an anxiety disorder last year that was started by me fainting on holiday. I felt as though I was going to faint all the time and struggled leaving the house, working etc. I got into a bit of a state with everything - I had a successful course of CBT and was prescribed 50mg sertraline for 6 months which worked perfectly for me.
I came off the meds in July this year without too many hiccups at first. Unfortunately about 2 months ago I started to get dizzy again and fear the fainting. I re-started CBT and felt as though I was starting to get back on track.
A couple of weeks ago, without any real warning, I just started to doubt my relationship of 5 years. I have never had these feelings before but they came on really strongly to the point where I am now a complete mess. I'm back on meds and have these doubts all the time that stop me eating, make me feel sick etc. The fear of fainting/dizziness is now non-existent. I am also back with my therapist who is helping me tease out what is going on.
I think my problem is I don't know what is real. Our relationship isn't perfect but I've always been happy and contented enough. I have had these doubts that started with a previous boyfriend that turned out to be true and I'm scared that these are the same. I think the difference is in my last relationship I never really loved the guy whereas this time we have bought a house together and I have relocated to be with him.
I guess I want to know if anyone else has felt like this. Could I be so anxious of being alone that I am hoping the doubts are anxiety so I stay with him, or could the anxiety be making me think that I have doubts. I'm in such turmoil. Could it just be normal relationship niggles that have blown up because I was feeling low?
One thing I have noticed today is that when I look at pictures of him and us I really love the guy in the pics but I doubt him in real life. I feel like I'm going completely mad. If anyone could give me some advice I would really appreciate it.
I don't really know where to start but here goes.
I was diagnosed with an anxiety disorder last year that was started by me fainting on holiday. I felt as though I was going to faint all the time and struggled leaving the house, working etc. I got into a bit of a state with everything - I had a successful course of CBT and was prescribed 50mg sertraline for 6 months which worked perfectly for me.
I came off the meds in July this year without too many hiccups at first. Unfortunately about 2 months ago I started to get dizzy again and fear the fainting. I re-started CBT and felt as though I was starting to get back on track.
A couple of weeks ago, without any real warning, I just started to doubt my relationship of 5 years. I have never had these feelings before but they came on really strongly to the point where I am now a complete mess. I'm back on meds and have these doubts all the time that stop me eating, make me feel sick etc. The fear of fainting/dizziness is now non-existent. I am also back with my therapist who is helping me tease out what is going on.
I think my problem is I don't know what is real. Our relationship isn't perfect but I've always been happy and contented enough. I have had these doubts that started with a previous boyfriend that turned out to be true and I'm scared that these are the same. I think the difference is in my last relationship I never really loved the guy whereas this time we have bought a house together and I have relocated to be with him.
I guess I want to know if anyone else has felt like this. Could I be so anxious of being alone that I am hoping the doubts are anxiety so I stay with him, or could the anxiety be making me think that I have doubts. I'm in such turmoil. Could it just be normal relationship niggles that have blown up because I was feeling low?
One thing I have noticed today is that when I look at pictures of him and us I really love the guy in the pics but I doubt him in real life. I feel like I'm going completely mad. If anyone could give me some advice I would really appreciate it.