When do I give in and go back on the meds?

[swgrl09]

I am so frustrated. I am trying so hard through therapy, exercise, keeping busy and active, and using self-help techniques but I feel like my HA is getting worse and worse every day. My husband said to him it doesn't seem as bad as I describe it, but of course he isn't in my head and sometimes I hide things from him because I am embarrassed.

Every single day this weekend has been something different. I am exhausted. I need to enjoy my life while I DON'T have anything to worry about.

I feel like I have no control over this and that it is just getting worse. When do I throw in the towel and go back on lexapro? I really don't want to if I don't have to ... I want to do this the right way and not the easy way. I don't know anymore :shrug:

[uklad]

through my past experience have always waited until ive had the f*** it mind set before going on or changing medication.... as much as I hate the fact im taking medication I find symptoms are less intense and is helping me sleep which helps. Sorry I don't have the answer but if your determined to stay off medication you could try new self help methods what may help like keeping a diary or relaxation cds.... having time to relax is also important! Hope things ease up!

[swgrl09]

Thanks, UKLad. I should keep a diary. I started a while ago and then forgot where I left it!! lol but you just reminded me that it exists somewhere in my apartment. I know what you mean about the f* it mindset before going/changing meds. When I went on lexapro last time, I only did because I was also extremely depressed. Now it's more just anxiety. The anxiety did get better with the lexapro which was a nice plus for me, but not why I went on it.

I felt a lot better, got off them in March this year, and now things are really bad again. I don't know. I really want to beat this without them because I know I can't always be on meds, especially if I want to have a baby in the next few years. My sister just stopped cold turkey because she got pregnant and it was really rough on her.

I did have a nice, relaxing day today finally which was needed. I was anxious but trying to not give into the feelings/obsessions. Thank you for your response :hugs:

[HalfJack]

It's easy to forget to slow down and have fun when you're trying to stay on the ball and fight mental illness; sometimes I wear myself down from pushing myself too hard. If you're not already, you might find that the HA calms down if you slow down a bit or put aside more time for pleasurable/fun/social things or like a spa day, day out with family, night out, painting, dinner party something like that.

I'm a lot better than I was the last time I took medication, but over the last year my mood dropped terribly so I've gone back on meds. To me it was a good thing, because it meant I could continue progressing but I get why they make some people feel uncomfortable. Whatever you do good luck lovely :)

[swgrl09]

Thank you HalfJack, for your really thoughtful reply. It's true, I need to make time to relax. Today I did some chores and worked out, then had time to just chill. I haven't had that in a few weeks.

I'm glad you are doing better and making progress :) If I do have to go back on meds, it's not the end of the world. If it helps, it helps, right?