winter evenings/low light

[elrose]

hey, i was just wondering does anyone else have heightened anxiety in the evening? i find anywhere between 5-9 i start feeling pretty awful. i'm not sure if it's a light thing, i think i have a slight dereality anxiety symptom, and i think the lack of natural light and the increase of artificial light makes everything seem kind of dreamlike and not quite real, and my anxiety feels worse! also i seem to get pretty nervous about going out (which sucks as a student) so maybe as the evening rolls in i start thinking about that too. who knows, i was just wandering if anybody else gets this way and if they've got any tips! x

[SADnomore]

Hi, Elrose!
Okay, well, as part of my newly-diagnosed (this spring) but long, long running seasonal affective disorder, I know exactly what you mean. For me, the double whammy of pitch darkness PLUS cold in the winter months means I just don't get out much in the evenings. Have to watch that, as, if I don't HAVE to, I will stop going out during the day, too. After 4-5 days of that, I am getting the beginnings of agorophobia, and so I have to force myself out and about so it doesn't start to feel too weird when I do!

In short, yes, I do believe what you're experiencing has to do with the shortened daylight. Yes, I do think it can make us feel anxious about going out. And very anxious as it begins to get dark so early, whether we are in or out. But being in, it makes it almost impossible to get out the door. :mad: I am also affected by the dark mornings, as in mid-winter it doesn't get light until 10 a.m. Ugh. Depressing. :weep: Even moreso when the sun doesn't come out and it stays grey all day.

You may have heard of light "box" therapy (recommended is 10,000 lux, which I hear is good and bright). I am considering tracking one down, to use in the early mornings (the new, stronger ones only require 1/2 hour or so of exposure then). My niece with SAD has a box at home (she rises very early for work), and one in her office, and they help her cope, she says.

There is also an "alarm clock" version that mimics sunrise and sunset, and while it sounds lovely, I am leaning more towards the light box, because it may work better for supplementing the light deprivation. Anyway, there's a thought! Meanwhile, studies have supported the use of day-mimicking ambient lighting in the early mornings. Using stronger light bulbs in winter and switching them on throughout the house on rising. A bit tough on the light bills maybe, but if it works ... I have a friend who does this then starts the kettle and turns on all the tvs, lol! Fun channels. I might try the radio or cds while sitting down with that first cuppa to check my email :D

I do find that I can make occasional forays for an evening meet-up IF I make a point of getting my shoes on and getting out way early, while it's still light out. I force myself out to one or two such each week.

For awhile they were offering yoga classes right at 5 pm, and I would go do a bit of shopping for an hour or so mid-afternoon and then head over early. I very much enjoyed it and felt better afterwards. Even though it was dark for the drive home, that part didn't bother me!

So, there's a few suggestions. Supplementing light at morning especially. And maybe from 5-8 pm as well. Creating some kind of lively noise around you. Coaxing yourself out every day so as to keep that going. And something social/spiritual to help you to feel better EVERY WEEK.

After a truly horrible winter mentally last year I ended up at the doctors (diagnosis: SAD) and have begun meds against it this year. Fingers crossed. So far, so good, no tears as fall marches on here! If you find your anxiety gets worse or you get depression as well, you may choose to talk to your doctor about it. But good luck and know you are among friends here on NMP! Keep posting ... :hugs:

Marie

[MyNameIsTerry]

I'm more anxious in the mornings but anxiety disorders are often more intense in mornings or evenings from what I have read.

I did once meet a guy who did suffer worse anxiety at night. He avoided going out at nights and seeing his family because of it. Is there something you are anticipating or do you feel uneasy in the dark? This guy experienced this all year, it would be worse in Winter because of the extra darkness though. Or does your mood drop with Winter but you are ok in the darkness the rest of the year as in Marie's SAD issue?

[chickpea]

I have definitely found the change of season affecting me.
Today, I've been pretty good all day but I can feel my anxiety and low mood creeping in with the darkness.
It's really strange, because looking back, I gave birth to my first child in October and found the short days really hard to cope with - feeding her at night, it felt like I spent most of the days in the dark.
I actually love the Autumn but there's something about the evening a when I'm going through anxiety that makes me feel so much worse.

[MrAndy]

Anxiety is worse in the mornings because your body is producing cortisol to wake you up,people with anxiety produce more.I actually sleep better in the winter as the early morning light doesn't wake me up at 4am!
January and February are the months that get to me,cold,skint and summer seems ages away

[Lyn89]

It could also be that it's a change from summer light and hours, and we anxious people do not like change! My recommendation would be to start going out when it's dark. Not clubbing or put with friends straight away, but walk down the shop or even just out your door! something easy, then build it up. There's nothing you can't do in the dark that you can do in the day :) if you can cope in the light, you're still the same you and can cope in the dark. You just need to show yourself that.

[elrose]

to marie: that was such a helpful message to read! glad to hear i'm not the only one who struggles with the change of light! i completely relate to the slight agoraphobic feelings, i find even after just a day or two in the flat i struggle with going outside. i think that's a great idea to try and get out before it gets dark, because at least i'll be out and about before anything hits. i've been starting drawing in cafes, so i might try to head out around 4 and stay until 8 or 9 or so. thanks for the encouraging words!

[SADnomore]

You're more than welcome! And, oh, that's a wonderful idea! I draw, too, and used to sit in the student lounge back in the day and draw. Never thought of taking a drawing board into a café though ... Love that idea, thanks! :hugs:

[MyNameIsTerry]

Does your drawing relax & distract you? If so, how about being out more at night and doing this? Maybe it would help reduce the night anxiety and help build your confidence?

[SADnomore]

... And yes, for me getting out the door while it's still light out makes all the difference between getting out that day, or not. :-) Once darkness falls, no matter how hard I try I just can't do it. It's crazy I know.

And Lyn, you are 100% right about us all being the same "you' and being able to do whatever you do in the light in the dark. Logically. Of course you're right. It doesn't make sense, I know. But I have actually got dressed ready to go to yoga or something, and pulled the door open and literally been unable to put one foot outside. And the icy wind blowing the snow into my face and swirling in through the doorway makes me want to burst into tears. I close it again and sit down and take my boots off. I just hate it, and I do keep trying in case something changes. It gets worse every winter. But at least I can get out in the daytime as long as I keep doing it. My husband keeps track, and if it's been more than 3 days, he makes me go out for a drive with him. Will stop for a few groceries or a Starbucks and will have me take them through the till so I have to speak to other people, lol!

---------- Post added at 23:25 ---------- Previous post was at 21:31 ----------

Hey, Terry, good to see you!

Drawing is really relaxing, I used to love it, even though I don't have much for techniques, lol! Charcoal, drawing paper. A piece of hardboard and a couple bulldog clips ...

Ugh, I need something. No patience in this darkness. Feel closed in :P

Marie

[MyNameIsTerry]

Hi Marie, good to see you too!

I keep meaning that take drawing up again. I used to love it when I was younger but stopped as work took over. What sort of stuff did you draw?

What about craftwork of some variety? You do make various things from jewellery to bags, do pottery, etc. Maybe variation might be a better way if you find yourself suffocated by routines?

[SADnomore]

(I tried to post this last night, but for some reason it didn't update?)

I used to draw usually trees, plants. Scenery. Still life (we had to). People chatting or reading/studying.

There were those in my class who already knew how to sort of "carve out" realistic-looking objects with charcoal shading. We weren't actually shown how, and I couldn't "see" how to do it, so I still just draw the outlines of things. Still relaxing though.

Pottery has always interested me, however ever since having the lasik surgery a few years ago I no longer have the vision for small-detail work, more's the pity!

[tealifeform]

I definitely find myself more anxious in the evening. Things seem so much more 'real' and 'scary'. :lac: