CleverLittleViper
09-10-14, 20:31
This is what I'm struggling with right now, and I wish I wasn't.
Accepting the diagnosis of anxiety. It all began when I started noticing my hands going numb-it began with my right hand (my dominant one) and slowly swept over to my left. I was dx. initially with Carpal Tunnel Syndrome, and I personally believe that is what I have. The diagnostic tests confirm my suspicions.
Well, the first GP I saw, asked a few questions that left me reeling, and I wasn't entirely "honest" with her about my history. It must be noted that I never normally go to the GP. I think the last time I was there was in July 2013 for a routine smear and that was only because I couldn't avoid it...
She asked if I'd ever had any vision problems. I said, "No," because I didn't think it was relevant. My vision problems were way back in March, and it wasn't my vision, per se, but more the fact that I had dry, itchy and sore eyes that resembled more like eye strain symptoms for a while. No blurred vision, no blind spots, no colour blindness and no double vision at all.
Plus, I'd been to the opticians the Monday of that week, and my eye test confirmed that my eyes were perfectly fine and healthy. So, I declared that I'd never suffered with vision problems which was a lie.
Well, she ordered some routine blood tests to check for things like my thyroid, my thyroid function, my cholesterol, my vitamin b12 levels, just to give me an all-round health check, and to see if maybe my thyroid was causing the CTS. Though she suspected it was just something that may come and go of its own accord, so she delayed treatment until she saw how it played out.
Since then, I've dealt with:
1) Numb hands and feet
2) Cold extremities
3) Insomnia
4) Persistent pressure headache/migraine
5) Numb/tight face
6) Constant dizziness but this may be caused by the Propranolol or the Amitriptyline.
7) Internal shakes
8) Vibration/buzzing sensation, especially in legs
9) Electric shocks/pricks/zingers
10) Frequent urination
11) Loss of appetite/weight loss
12) Lump in throat/difficulty swallowing/feeling like tongue is swollen
13) Muscles aches and cramps
14) Stiffness and weakness of limbs/joints
15) Nausea
I've seen two doctors, and both reached the same conclusion, that I have severe anxiety. One doctor did a physical exam-he checked behind my eyes, my reflexes, my blood pressure, my strength, my grip, etc. He couldn't find anything discernible wrong with me, except for my anxiety.
The other, my regular GP, didn't do any physical exam, but she did report back to me about my blood work up, and declared that they were all normal and healthy. :yahoo: Great, right?
Well, me being me, and it being the time of year it is (I'm an SAD sufferer which triggers my HA and OCD) can't let go of the suggestion of the disease that may not be named. (Clue: it's something that HA sufferers commonly fear two words...) My GP declares that it is not something I have to worry about, and says that unless I believe her, there's nothing she can say about that.
I've been buzzing non-stop for the past few days. Especially in my left leg. I read that sufferers of the disease that shall not be named get electric shocks and then I start getting them, and I pretty much always feel like I'm stuck on a boat somewhere, even when sitting down. As I say, that could be because of my meds.
If 2 doctors reach the same conclusion, they can't be wrong, can they? I mean, I have to stop consulting Dr Google and start listening to the professionals. If I don't, I'm surely just going to continue down the same path for no reason other than I do not like uncertainty. Because the disease that shall not be named is hard to test for, as in, I'd need a referral, and I'm not getting one, I can't just simply put it to bed.
In 2011, I feared having HIV. That was easy to deal with. I skipped on down to the clinic, got a test and a week later, I was in the clear. Hey presto. Now, I'm left, forced to trust my doctor who I keep thinking "Well, she hasn't physically examined me...so how can she know for sure?" Then, I think, well, the second doctor did examine me, and he came up with the same result as she has, so she's probably bang on the money.
I've experienced HA before, and anxiety before, but never like this. I don't know what has made me react so physically this time round. But I have, and that's why, I think, I'm having such difficulty accepting the diagnosis, but I know acceptance is the first step towards healing, and away from feeling like this.
Does anyone have any tips on accepting the diagnosis? I apologise that this has been a long post. It's not likely that both doctors are wrong, is it?
Accepting the diagnosis of anxiety. It all began when I started noticing my hands going numb-it began with my right hand (my dominant one) and slowly swept over to my left. I was dx. initially with Carpal Tunnel Syndrome, and I personally believe that is what I have. The diagnostic tests confirm my suspicions.
Well, the first GP I saw, asked a few questions that left me reeling, and I wasn't entirely "honest" with her about my history. It must be noted that I never normally go to the GP. I think the last time I was there was in July 2013 for a routine smear and that was only because I couldn't avoid it...
She asked if I'd ever had any vision problems. I said, "No," because I didn't think it was relevant. My vision problems were way back in March, and it wasn't my vision, per se, but more the fact that I had dry, itchy and sore eyes that resembled more like eye strain symptoms for a while. No blurred vision, no blind spots, no colour blindness and no double vision at all.
Plus, I'd been to the opticians the Monday of that week, and my eye test confirmed that my eyes were perfectly fine and healthy. So, I declared that I'd never suffered with vision problems which was a lie.
Well, she ordered some routine blood tests to check for things like my thyroid, my thyroid function, my cholesterol, my vitamin b12 levels, just to give me an all-round health check, and to see if maybe my thyroid was causing the CTS. Though she suspected it was just something that may come and go of its own accord, so she delayed treatment until she saw how it played out.
Since then, I've dealt with:
1) Numb hands and feet
2) Cold extremities
3) Insomnia
4) Persistent pressure headache/migraine
5) Numb/tight face
6) Constant dizziness but this may be caused by the Propranolol or the Amitriptyline.
7) Internal shakes
8) Vibration/buzzing sensation, especially in legs
9) Electric shocks/pricks/zingers
10) Frequent urination
11) Loss of appetite/weight loss
12) Lump in throat/difficulty swallowing/feeling like tongue is swollen
13) Muscles aches and cramps
14) Stiffness and weakness of limbs/joints
15) Nausea
I've seen two doctors, and both reached the same conclusion, that I have severe anxiety. One doctor did a physical exam-he checked behind my eyes, my reflexes, my blood pressure, my strength, my grip, etc. He couldn't find anything discernible wrong with me, except for my anxiety.
The other, my regular GP, didn't do any physical exam, but she did report back to me about my blood work up, and declared that they were all normal and healthy. :yahoo: Great, right?
Well, me being me, and it being the time of year it is (I'm an SAD sufferer which triggers my HA and OCD) can't let go of the suggestion of the disease that may not be named. (Clue: it's something that HA sufferers commonly fear two words...) My GP declares that it is not something I have to worry about, and says that unless I believe her, there's nothing she can say about that.
I've been buzzing non-stop for the past few days. Especially in my left leg. I read that sufferers of the disease that shall not be named get electric shocks and then I start getting them, and I pretty much always feel like I'm stuck on a boat somewhere, even when sitting down. As I say, that could be because of my meds.
If 2 doctors reach the same conclusion, they can't be wrong, can they? I mean, I have to stop consulting Dr Google and start listening to the professionals. If I don't, I'm surely just going to continue down the same path for no reason other than I do not like uncertainty. Because the disease that shall not be named is hard to test for, as in, I'd need a referral, and I'm not getting one, I can't just simply put it to bed.
In 2011, I feared having HIV. That was easy to deal with. I skipped on down to the clinic, got a test and a week later, I was in the clear. Hey presto. Now, I'm left, forced to trust my doctor who I keep thinking "Well, she hasn't physically examined me...so how can she know for sure?" Then, I think, well, the second doctor did examine me, and he came up with the same result as she has, so she's probably bang on the money.
I've experienced HA before, and anxiety before, but never like this. I don't know what has made me react so physically this time round. But I have, and that's why, I think, I'm having such difficulty accepting the diagnosis, but I know acceptance is the first step towards healing, and away from feeling like this.
Does anyone have any tips on accepting the diagnosis? I apologise that this has been a long post. It's not likely that both doctors are wrong, is it?