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angel
11-10-03, 21:10
Good evening everyone, this is my first message on this forum! I suffered from severe anxiety last October, and as a nurse I did not even recognise it - thinking I was dying of a stroke/heart attack/brain tumour! It took eight long weeks for me to accept I was very much alive and would need to learn to control the symptoms. During this time I have been attending for fertility treatments. All in all my moods/anxieties have been worsened, so much so that my work colleagues have noticed. My boss, who is not the most understanding, and I had a huge row on Wed this week, and she brought up my sickness absence (last October)this upset me, causing me to over react claiming i was going to take out a greivance against her. We both ended up extremely angry and upset, and it took the main boss of the centre to calm us down. What I want to know is how to go to work and keep a cool head, think positive (as she said I always say I am unhappy there, what she does not know is i think she is indirectly bullying me ), and not show myself up!

Angel:(

Meg
11-10-03, 23:24
Hi Angel,

Don't worry about not being able to self diagnose anxiety- just join the club...

IVF is so stressfull especially when time is passing. Also,it's so hard not to bring it to work with you when you're on extra hormones...

Your boss should not have brought up the sick leave from a year ago and it should not be a point of discussion at this late stage without HR being involved.

Your messed up hormones will not be helping your anxiety, anger or general moods. I think managing this comes down to basic self control and attitude - keep your head down and get on with your work to the best of your ability keeping the patients and your colleagues needs in mind .

Do reflect for a moment on what she said about your several comments on not being happy. From a ITU H grade perspective I can vouch that it only takes one person to keep saying they're not happy and moan a lot to really unsettle a whole unit so I can see it from her point of view as well as yours.

I would suggest that you set yourself a task of thinking about what may happen within the workplace that could upset you and how you would like to react more appropriately.
In general the rule is to remove yourself from the situation if it's getting heated and the fur is likely to fly.

If you do think you're being bullied contact your RCN steward and discuss it. They can make a judgement as they get things like this brought to them every day.

If you and your nearest and dearest think the swings and changes within you have been extreme then ring and discuss it with your fertility team.


All the very best for your treatment





Meg

Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...