cally24
19-10-14, 22:20
Hi all,
I don't post often, I tend to just read but I feel I need some sort of help or even just people to chat with.
I started a new teaching job in September after leaving a school with low moral, bullying senior leaders and a nasty habit of forcing people out of their jobs. I was elated when I 'escaped', but now I would quite happily return. My new job isn't any where near as bad and even though I'm obviously still in the 'settling in' period, I still feel anxious about going to work. I've been in a foul mood all weekend. What hasn't helped is that I've fallen out with my line manager, who on Thursday ordered me out of her room when I admitted to a mistake and said that she 'didn't want to speak to me'.
I constantly feel like I'm not good enough in the eyes of the staff because I'm not the old teacher (she had lots of friends, the kids loved her, she seems like she was perfect). I also feel very lonely, this recent falling out hasn't helped in the slightes . I'm also worried I've got on the wrong side of management already.
Everyone around me also seems to have it so much better as well. Many of my friends moved on at the same time as me and they've moved into jobs they love. It's galling and I just don't understand why I get myself into these situations when everyone else gets it so good.
I'd been seeing a therapist for a couple of months for a separate issue linked to anxiety and she'd been helping me with pushing troublesome thoughts from my head but since the sessions stopped I've not found it as easy to do this (I'm currently on a waiting list for CBT, but it's been a month since my referral).
I don't know what solutions I expect from anyone, but it's nice to have somewhere to sound off.
I don't post often, I tend to just read but I feel I need some sort of help or even just people to chat with.
I started a new teaching job in September after leaving a school with low moral, bullying senior leaders and a nasty habit of forcing people out of their jobs. I was elated when I 'escaped', but now I would quite happily return. My new job isn't any where near as bad and even though I'm obviously still in the 'settling in' period, I still feel anxious about going to work. I've been in a foul mood all weekend. What hasn't helped is that I've fallen out with my line manager, who on Thursday ordered me out of her room when I admitted to a mistake and said that she 'didn't want to speak to me'.
I constantly feel like I'm not good enough in the eyes of the staff because I'm not the old teacher (she had lots of friends, the kids loved her, she seems like she was perfect). I also feel very lonely, this recent falling out hasn't helped in the slightes . I'm also worried I've got on the wrong side of management already.
Everyone around me also seems to have it so much better as well. Many of my friends moved on at the same time as me and they've moved into jobs they love. It's galling and I just don't understand why I get myself into these situations when everyone else gets it so good.
I'd been seeing a therapist for a couple of months for a separate issue linked to anxiety and she'd been helping me with pushing troublesome thoughts from my head but since the sessions stopped I've not found it as easy to do this (I'm currently on a waiting list for CBT, but it's been a month since my referral).
I don't know what solutions I expect from anyone, but it's nice to have somewhere to sound off.