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Hello friends. My anxiety is really ramping up. My 2 year old son isn't really speaking. He says like 10 words. My doctor told me to have early intervention come and evaluate him. In the initial meeting the woman told me not to worry that he isn't on the spectrum but it wasn't the formal evaluation. Yesterday 2 women came. One for speech and one for overall development. The speech lady he did well with. He pointed to 6 objects in a book correctly. He played with her. The second lady was 20 mins late and my son was getting tired of answering questions.
I was fully aware that he would need speech therapy but I was not ready for the overall development eval to tell me that he needs a special education teacher. She said his cognitive development was a little behind and that she is concerned. The areas that he failed was that he wouldn't feed a toy bear and they asked him to put the bear to sleep and he covered it with a blanket it and rubbed it and she failed him because she said it looked like he was washing him. He failed because he stacked 4 blocks and not 5. The lady said he made no eye contact and his doctor always tells me he makes great eye contact. She said she couldn't tell me if he is autistic.
Autism is one of my biggest fears. I worry about him but in my gut I really feel like he isn't autistic. I am so afraid that they will label him and I do feel like autism is very over diagnosed. I am so upset. I feel like I can't handle this. I have so much I am dealing with. I don't want my baby to struggle in life. I picture him never having friends or being a part of society. I am scared stiff. Has anyone else been through this?
Hello :)
Please don't worry too much. My brother needed speech therapy when he has 3 he didn't start speaking until he was 5! They said it was just him he chose not to speak!
The issue I have with what you were told is when he put the bear to bed he put the blanket on but rubbed it and they said it looked like he was washing it?! What if when he goes to bed he rubs his face with a blanket as it comforts him for example of course he is going to do that as he associates it with sleep. These tests sometimes come across a little bizarre to me. All children are different and develop at different levels and time so one test can have different results in different children but that doesn't make them any less different ( if that makes any sense! ) try not to worry I know it's so difficult believe me I know. But he will see you worry and sense it :) take each step as it comes. Sorry I couldn't be much more help :) xx
Hi :)
This is my first time posting and hopefully I can be of some reassurance to you. I am a Speech and Language Therapist - I only qualified recently. I don't have a huge amount of experience with autism but I can tell you that when children come into the clinic, eye contact is something we do look for. However, during our training we were always reminded that we only see a glimpse of the child - a quick snapshot of what they are like. The therapist you met doesn't know your child as well as you do and if you feel that your little boy has good eye contact then trust that - you know him better than anyone. Is he shy?? Could this account for why she may have felt he had poor eye contact? Children can be distracted and sometimes they are too busy playing or doing what they want to pay attention to the adult in the room. Lots of children are delayed in their speech and language development and having to receive therapy for it is not the end of the world. There is loads you can do at home to help bring along his development. The therapist was asking your child to do specific things with the teddy etc and the reason for this was to have a look at his receptive language (i.e his understanding of language). Try not to worry too much & follow the advice of the therapist. Hope this is of some comfort to you.
mummyanxious
21-10-14, 14:45
RE don't worry too much at this stage. You'll know that all children develop at different rates. And it sounds like he was tired and didn't engage with this women well which would affect what he did and what she could assess him on. I wouldn't take what she says as gospel. I do also agree with you that autism is over diagnosed. We are all somewhere on the autistic spectrum but children with full on autism are very easy to spot and have certain traits. Hope you're ok xx
unsure_about_this
21-10-14, 18:53
Hi
I think I was a late speaker looking at a book of the appointments I had up to the age of three, I had speech therapy from about 3 to 10. I have dyspraxia so for me this condition has affected my speech also have NF I am unsure whether this has affect my speech I do not know.
Thanks for the responses everyone. I am not dealing with this well at all. I'm not eating and vomiting which is really bad because I just got out of the hospital last week. I can't stop researching this and every time I put in cognitive and speech delay, autism is the only thing that comes up. I honestly feel like I cannot deal with this. I don't know what to do.
RoseE,
It's your child. We do what we have to as parents regardless and you'll do just that. It won't change you or the way you feel about your child and in fact will make you a stronger person if indeed there is an issue.
That being said. There's not a problem until something is officially diagnosed.
Positive thoughts and prayers
Your son is two years old. He did great with the speech therapist. He was tired when the other lady came around. Think: can he even count to five (not all two year olds can!)? Being that he's your child, you and your doctor would know if something was off. He sounds like a normal, albeit tired, 2 year old to me in regards to that evaluation.
For the speech teacher - as another poster said, it sounds like his receptive language is great which is a good sign. His expressive language may be delayed, but if he's a happy and healthy child, it may just be that he doesn't need to speak much because you know what he needs and all his wants/needs are being met without him having to vocalize them. This is a pretty easy thing for any speech therapist to go about fixing - and has nothing to do with autism.
I also think autism is over diagnosed and it seems every other child is on the spectrum somewhere. I'm not qualified to tell you if your child is autistic, and without seeing him it's impossible for anyone to do so, but in my opinion he doesn't sound autistic at all. The reason you are getting autism in your google searches is because it's so often talked about and diagnosed. Google brings up popular results.
In any case, my mother is a special education teacher for K-2 children. She has a lot of kids in her class that are truly very bright, but just need some extra help in certain areas. She's had plenty of kids that, by the time they move onto the next elementary building for 3rd grade, aren't in special education anymore. So just because your 2 year old needs a little extra help, doesn't mean he'll always need it. He may just need a bit of an extra push (or he may have just been tired and not need extra help at all!).
I know you're stressed, but do try to stay positive :)
When my younger son was 2 year old, he could hardly speak or engage adults in activities too. My elder son was already reciting the alphabet before turning 2.
Every kid learns at a different rate.
My younger son is now 3.5 years old, and he's so talkative and active now that you would not recognise him if you compare him one and a half year ago.
The turning point was sending him to a pre-school. Playing with other children made him more confident and sociable.
Hi there, I didn't speak until I was about 2 1/2. My mom said that this seemed to be because I wanted to be able to say sentences rather than just words (so I must have been born contrary!). 2 isn't abnormal for speech, particularly if other milestones have happened at the right time, as our developing brains can only cope with one thing at a time.
Dont even fear if he is on the spectrum. My son has aspergers ( high functioning autism ). He is the best thing that has ever happened to me and together we have accomplished so much. He is in a normal school, has so many friends, is social and has a brain like einstein . He finishes up all his therapies next month ( he is 7 ) and we are ready for the world. Dont see the label as anything. I also am on the spectrum and besides my anxiety, my life is amazing. The way I see it we are sprinkled with something magic.
The more I read about autism the less scary it becomes. Leebop you are right. I've been reading the blogs that are written by people with ASD and they seem so gifted and intelligent. A lot if them are mad that people call it a disorder when it's just different. I guess I have this idea in my head of what autism is and it's being alone and lost. The reality is quite different it seems. I still believe my son wasn't comfortable with the demands placed on him. No matter what he is my little boy. I wouldn't change a thing. I just want him to have a happy life. Thank you all for your support.
cosmetic_disaster
26-10-14, 16:30
As a parent of a child with autism I can promise you it's not as bad as it seems, given the right therapies etc they can really excel, my son was diagnosed last year at the age of three, at the time he didn't speak and was just like a little zombie but with hard work and dedication he can know say some small sentences, try not to worry, I know having health anxiety makes things seem a million times worse than they actually are, my biggest health anxiety is cancer, I avoid drs at all cost and constantly Google things. But as someone who knows autism very well I can promise you it's not as bad as it's made out to be in the media, don't get me wrong there are hard days and days when you feel really stressed, but all will be ok :)
Thank you all. I am so glad to hear your son is doing better :) I think my son was really uncomfortable with the evaluation. I got the written results and they are not bad at all. In fact he just qualifies for services. In my heart I don't think he is on the spectrum at all. If he is I will do all I can for him. I love him. I am just afraid that they are going to pressure me to have him tested and I don't feel he needs to be. I have a meeting with early intervention tomorrow. I hope it goes well.
RoseE,
I think I told you about my daughter. We were worried when she was your son's age. She ended up being evaluated and they found her mind was thinking faster than her mouth could form the words. It was as simple as some speech therapy. She still talks a mile a minute! ~lol~
Positive thoughts
MRS STRESS ED
26-10-14, 19:21
Hi RoseEve I get so annoyed with these health professionals,they go by text book ,my niece's little girl had that same development test and said she was behind with her talking,my niece was so upset,I said to her she's not behind she just didn't speak because she didn't know that women,she's alittle chatter box.Please don't worry every child is different and unique they all learn in their own time,these people think that they should perform like seals xx
I totally agree. They said he was a little behind cognitively which was really upsetting. Yet this last week all on his own he has started potty training. If you have a girl that is delayed they aren't that cautious but a speech delayed boy they take very seriously. I agree mrs stressed they do expect them to perform like seals. They come in and ask them to do a lot if different tasks at the end he threw a toy at them. She was like is this typical? I said no he is upset. I'm so crazy I asked to complete strangers at the store if he made contact when they said hello. They said yes and I was like I'm sorry I'm out if my mind. It's kind of funny but kind of sad.
MRS STRESS ED
26-10-14, 22:57
RoseEve honestly don't worry your little boy will be fine and hehehe �� didn't she take the hint when he threw a toy at her,it's not fair to have parents worried you have enough to worry about being a parent,remember your doing a great job know one knows your child �� better than you xxxx
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