miss sparkle
12-11-14, 18:41
Hi everyone. I have been on and off this site for a few years now. It all began a few years back when i just started to feel really run down, tired etc. I was suffering from alot of headaches, sore dry eyes, floaters etc, and i became convinced i had a brain tumour. I went to the doctor in nears on numerous occasions and eventually after clear blood tests and a eye check i was sent on my way with the anxiety tag. I didnt actually start to feel better when i realised my husband was having abit of a facebook fling/chatting to a x kinda thing, weiredly it completely took focus away from my symptoms and i felt fine. I guess all my thoughts were now unstandably about that. Anyway i lose weight, went gym and had a year of feeling great (me and hubby sorted things through. We have two small kids and apart from that have been happy)i had a time when i was worrying obsessively about a breast lump for a few months, until it was checked and was fine. But i spent hours reading breast cancer sites etc. You all know how it is! ;)
i had a year of happy stress free time. Sometime later i felt a lymph node in my groin that i remember not being too conserned about. But it was enlarged. I also had a pain in my side i was convinced was liver cancer, which i had a very brief abdominal scan for. That was last year. This year has been a slow slope downward really. I have already been back to the breast clinic convinced my lump has grown, again all ok..apparently.
now my focus is onto this node that im convinced is bigger and i have constant all day long back ache and stomach ache. I literally wake up with it and go bed with it. So OBVIOUSLY its even lymphoma spine liver cervical or ovarian cancer. I have started getting the exhaustion and slight dizzynessand headaches again which rationally is my body worn out, but of course its adding fuel to the fire about i think i am dying...again.
I am a bisy hairdresser. I have two young kids lots of friends and i am not generally unhappy. I dont tell anyone how i feel or my fears as no one understands the extent of my worry or the seriousness in which i take my thoughts.
i know i should go doctors but instead of running for reassurance, i now feel paralysed with fear as i think there really is something seriously wrong. The node, the back ache and stomach ache are literally worrying me to death.
I know this is a long and pointless post. But after hovering for a while i just wanted to get it out there and hopefully get a bit if support. I guess like you all. My pains and lumps bumps are real. So i struggle to see how its all caused by anxiety.
Thanks for reading :) x
0s sorry bout apelling/ typos i have acrillic nails and find it hard to press small keypad on phone :doh:
i had a year of happy stress free time. Sometime later i felt a lymph node in my groin that i remember not being too conserned about. But it was enlarged. I also had a pain in my side i was convinced was liver cancer, which i had a very brief abdominal scan for. That was last year. This year has been a slow slope downward really. I have already been back to the breast clinic convinced my lump has grown, again all ok..apparently.
now my focus is onto this node that im convinced is bigger and i have constant all day long back ache and stomach ache. I literally wake up with it and go bed with it. So OBVIOUSLY its even lymphoma spine liver cervical or ovarian cancer. I have started getting the exhaustion and slight dizzynessand headaches again which rationally is my body worn out, but of course its adding fuel to the fire about i think i am dying...again.
I am a bisy hairdresser. I have two young kids lots of friends and i am not generally unhappy. I dont tell anyone how i feel or my fears as no one understands the extent of my worry or the seriousness in which i take my thoughts.
i know i should go doctors but instead of running for reassurance, i now feel paralysed with fear as i think there really is something seriously wrong. The node, the back ache and stomach ache are literally worrying me to death.
I know this is a long and pointless post. But after hovering for a while i just wanted to get it out there and hopefully get a bit if support. I guess like you all. My pains and lumps bumps are real. So i struggle to see how its all caused by anxiety.
Thanks for reading :) x
0s sorry bout apelling/ typos i have acrillic nails and find it hard to press small keypad on phone :doh: