Communication Issues

[morif]

Hi,

It had been a while since i last posted at this forum but as my anxiety was under control to a certain extent.

Last week i was out of country for a business trip for a week, during this week i had a really awful time as i spent most of the time alone and start feeling it hard to communicate with people although it was never a concern to me.

Now and after am back am constantly feeling that i had lost the ability to communicate well with people even the close ones, even when i push myself to do i feel like a naive person, i also finding it hard to accomplish anything and pushing myself hard to do anything. Am even feeling emotionless and my self esteem is at lowest. I wonder if anyone had ever experienced the same or can relate.

Thanks

[wabbit1]

I can relate to what you are saying. I feel lonely but not interested in actually speaking to people.

[Oosh]

All the time.

Remember your reasons for having confidence.
What have you done well in the past ?
What do people like about you ?
What are you good at ?
What do you value about yourself ?
What do you think you do well ?
What are your personal qualities ?

Remember then get back involved and go on auto pilot and work to forget yourself and just flow.

Remember your reasons for feeling confident, feel your spirits lift and aspire to enjoy yourself.

[lior]

I can relate to this too. I'm not even totally sure that it's a confidence thing. I am not as articulate as I have been in the past, and I do worry about that. I'm quieter, I'm afraid of speaking in public so I don't ask questions at the end of talks, and that never used to be an issue. I also say things I don't mean when I meet new people sometimes. And I'm more socially awkward with friends. I'm frustrated with myself. Is that similar to you?

[morif]

Hi Everyone,

Thanks for your replies.

Yes Lior, but this had been the case recently only, i always had some social anxiety to a certain extent that was acceptable for more, but lately i feel that am forcing myself to communicate with people including friends and family which causes me to feel like a naive person who is only talking for the sake of proving that nothing is wrong with me.

I just came back from a volleyball game where i had an awful time for the very first time as i felt i was detached and couldn't feel the joy i usually do when i play sports. even didnt get pleased when the guys i was playing with were complementing me for the god job i did at the game.

I really feel that am lost these days and still have this worry of going crazy or losing control in front of people and letting them notice something wrong with me. I wish i can know if this anciety had started to affect my personality in a bad way or its just another game that anxiety is playing with me. Can anyone please advice if had heard similar stories or even experienced this?

[lior]

I reckon it's not very positive to think of it as it affecting your personality. I think of it as affecting my behaviour. Behaviour is a passing thing. Personality is a more of a consistent thing.

I believe that being depressed and anxious is affecting my behaviour negatively. I don't like to think that being depressed is part of my personality - it's more of a passing mental health problem. I hope, anyway. If I was going to be depressed permanently, and affect my behaviour indefinitely, then I guess it would become part of my personality.

I worry about going crazy in front of people too, or having them notice there is something wrong with me.

[morif]

Yea I think what you already said is so true it's more related to behaviour and the way we behave in front of people.

Whey worries me the most is that I feel I can't fight these thoughts anymore, am not sure really if my mind had just shut down as a way to protect itself or it's a beginning of some serious. Furthermore anxiety is very tricky as whenever you're feeling bad your mind tries to convince you they you have never felt this bad although am pretty sure I felt much worse than now when the whole anxiety thing first started.

[lior]

Well, if you are concerned that things have progressed, are you going to go into therapy now?

When I first started to get bad this time round, I didn't think I needed therapy initially, until I totally flipped out. It's much better to start therapy earlier on, potentially preventing spiralling into something worse. I hope that next time I will know to get into therapy sooner rather than later.