iainm
28-11-14, 03:00
hi all just wanted to post this as my ha has virtually disappeared just 7 months ago I was a mess couldn't go out much constant pa trips to a+e constant 111 calls and sometimes 4 ambulances a week !!! I woke one day all those months back and decided I wanted to go for a walk which was very unlike me , so I done it and panicked the whole time but managed it , that night I had a great sleep which hadn't occurred much in 5 years ive suffered with ha pa etc , little by little I started going for more walks and of course ignoring my fast pulse being dizzy and all the other wonderful things anxiety offers , fast forward a few months I was walking 9 mile a day, and home went from being my prison to a place I only visit to sleep, I started going to shops the cinema all those things non anx sufferers see as mundane the transformation has been crazy , anyway fast forward another couple of month I had to visit a+e due to an injury non anx related (lol) and the nurse took my bp and pulse etc , now being a live in a small town the nurses all know me rofl ,and the nurse after doing my pulse started to laugh, I asked why ? she said I looked at your pulse from the 100,s of times you have been here and its normaly 96 which considering panic anything between 60/100 is normal , she said your pulse is 56bpm I was astounded !!! I sat there calm no sweaty palms or any ill feeling I felt great she asked if the panic had subsided I said had no pa for months, still get a few reminders but my mind dismisses it and it leaves as quick as it came I said my pulse is probably better due to exercise , I was so unfit , I still am in some respects but any exercise made me panic , I couldn't cope feeling my heart pounding in my chest and throat even my ears , and why im saying all this is because they say exercise helps , I scoffed at the idea but I tell you now I wish I had done it sooner , don't get me wrong its hard but everyone on here is so strong if they can live through the nightmare of ha they can get through im not 100% but I can live now im not scared anymore its like my mind went , well enough of that lets have some fun and the crazy thing is when a non sufferer says ohhh its all in the mind ( you think you cheeky **** how dare you ) but they were right since my mind has stopped playing tricks the change has been amazing and I would like to thank all the people who helped me on here at my darkest times, ive kept this post quite fun but I have been there so I wont get into much detail but please keep being strong I never thought I could feel well again I just wanted to die , but ive found life and its great,so I wish you all the best and I hope there is more stories of joy