Self-destructive procrastination...

[davidinmadrid]

Hello all,

Well, this is my first time putting pen to paper (so to speak) as now is the time I've thought 'enough is enough!', and 'why the heck am I doing this..?'

So, to be brief: I'm pursuing a PhD while also working freelance. But I am struggling in both, mainly because of myself.

If I receive an email asking something of me, I worry, leave it 'til tomorrow' and then the next day, until I then worry too much time has passed. If I don't check my emails for a few days, I then feel sick with worry that I will open them to find bad news (even though I can address this by getting on top of things in the moment).

Is this something that is experienced by others with GAD? Truth be told, I don't even know what's 'wrong' with me, but I certainly don't have any major panic attacks, more a constant feeling of worry that's holding me back and could ruin it all.

Any pointers towards helpful guides, literature, tips on breaking the cycle etc would be massively appreciated, not least as I don't feel I can speak with friends or family about this as I know they would not understand why I don't just reply to emails etc

[Cheesemonster13]

Hi David

I can't speak for anyone else who exhibits the same behaviour, but my procrastination has its roots in perfectionism. In my mind, some time in the future, I will be in exactly the right frame of mind to tackle a particular task, with access to all the resources I need and without other demands on my time. Unfortunately that never happens, and I expend a lot of unnecessary energy thinking about tackling projects instead of gritting my teeth and just getting on with them.

Here's a list of things that help me:

1. Break up large projects into small tasks that you can tackle daily or throughout the day.

2. Any task, big or small, requires preparation. If I have a job that I don't want to tackle, I get everything ready the night before so that I can work on it immediately.

3. Then, as I'm an early morning person, I tackle the dreaded task immediately I wake up, before I have much time to start thinking about it. I don't get dressed, I don't shower and I don't have my cup of coffee until the job is done.

4. Using a timer helps me focus on what I need to do. I find setting the timer for twenty minutes and just concentrating on that task during this period works.

5. I don't multitask because that means it takes longer to finish one job, and it is more important to complete one thing than have a lot of uncompleted projects on the go.

6. I don't do anything unnecessary as I only have a limited amount of energy available during the day. This includes worrying and thinking about a particular task. Either tackle it or forget about it.

7. I try to finish on a high. This makes it easier to pick up where I left off.

8. I identify a short-term (daily) and long-term (ultimate) end-point to any task or project. I always try to complete a project that I have started, unless I decide that it is really not worth the effort I am expending.

9. If I have a productive day, I reward myself.

10. I fall back into my old habits very easily, but I force myself back on track because it's in my own interest to do so.

Hope this helps.
:)