Scared Anxious and Panicky about going on holiday

[Roseyposey2]

Hi everyone, I'm new on here so I hope I'm posting this correctly. I was diagnosed with GAD 2.5 years ago and until recently was doing really well, so well that we booked a holiday to Disneyland Paris. This is the first time in 4 years that I have been abroad and as the time approaches I am petrified about going. I'm having trouble sleeping, eating and have a constantly churning tummy. I think I'm just frightened that I will feel like this when I'm there and want to come home and be stuck.

Has anyone got any POSITIVE stories or advice for me? Anybody else felt like this and then been fine once they were there?

Thank you in advance for any help xx

[debs71]

Hi Rosieposey2 and welcome, :hugs:

Yep, this has been an issue for me for several years now, though thankfully not too badly lately.

I also suffer from GAD/panic attacks and I am also like you just before I am due to travel. I feel sick, anxious, scared stiff that I will have a panic attack on the plane, that I will feel trapped on the plane, that I will be anxious when I am there, and the list goes on!

It all stemmed from me actually having a panic on a plane once, and after that it stuck in my head I think, so created the nerves and anxiety. I have actually cancelled holidays 24 hours before I am due to fly because of my high anxiety, and then afterwards have been really angry with myself for doing it!

This IS something you can overcome, I promise you. Anticipation is the worst part. We spend days or weeks KNOWING we are due to go away, and over that time we work ourselves into an anxious stew, when the actual thing and the actual day is not half as bad as we think. It is that thinking time that causes the problems.

What you must tell yourself is not the 'what if?' scenarios that run through your head. they are the worst. You must try to tell yourself the positives - that you are going on what will be a great trip, that when you arrive you will feel so good that you did, that a holiday is a happy thing, not a downer and that you will be perfectly fine. No negatives and NO WHAT IFS!!!

Don't anticipate what may happen on the day. It usually doesn't at all, it is just your mind TELLING you it will. Keep busy up until you go, socialise with friends and family, whatever keeps you distracted.

What you must also bear in mind that anxiety thrives when we are not busy. That will not be the case once you are there. You will be so caught up in the whole experience, sightseeing, planning your days in Disney, what you will see, where you will go and getting out and about that the last thing on your mind will be how you feel, I assure you. it is just that we ANTICIPATE we will feel bad.

I still get the nerves and the jitters before I go away...that never leaves me, but what has helped me is the times when I have overcome those feelings, got on that plane and made it. It is a confidence boost and your brain then learns that you CAN do it, and nothing bad will happen. I have not cancelled a holiday for a long time because of this. I have also been fine when away, as I am so busy going for long walks, seeing my friend and her daughter and catching some sun...all the normal holiday stuff.

Anticipation is the prime culprit here, nothing more. You can do it, and you will have a FAB time! Have a great holiday. :hugs:

[Roseyposey2]

Thank you debs71. I am so scared that I will not get on that plane and disappoint my children or that I will be this anxious and crying the entire time I'm there. Did you feel like this? And when you went was the experience totally different? I so desperately want to look forward to this trip instead of dreading it, it makes me feel like a terrible mum.

[debs71]

I know it is easier said than done saying 'you can do it.' The times I cancelled my holidays, my parents would do everything to try and bolster my confidence, and tell me I would be ok, but I swore up and down that I couldn't, and cancelled anyway, then bitterly regretted it afterwards, as as soon as I had cancelled, my anxiety had gone, and I thought rationally again, which just about proves that this is purely anxiety TELLING US we can't do it, that's all!

Try if you can to also remember that you are not travelling alone. You have the understanding and support of your family.

Yep, I have felt all the same as you, and almost as soon as I am on the way to the airport in the taxi, I can feel the anxiety start to lift as I am so focused on the stages of travelling (especially because I travel alone) and my brain is diverted to that.

As far as the plane goes, that is tricky as it is the quiet part mentally, so I take my Ipod with me or a travel DVD player and put my headphones on. I also bring a bottle of water and sweets to chew (I find that chewing helps keep me calm for some reason)

When I am actually there, I feel such a sense of achievement that my anxiety doesn't bug me at all, and I am sure that you will feel likewise.

You are not a bad Mum at all, just an anxiety sufferer x:hugs:

[Roseyposey2]

Thanks for your positive post. I am trying to look at all the positives but that awful feeling of dread makes it so difficult. I am fine one minute and almost having a panic attack about it the next. It's so hard when the kids and my hubby are so excited and all I want to do is cry. I keep putting pressure on myself to feel better before I go but maybe I should just try accepting how I feel and have a 'how ever I feel I feel' attitude. I mean, I feel like this now at home so I may as well be over there with my lovely family feeling like this rather than here on my own like it xx

[Humly]

Hi. I can relate a bit to what you are going through. I booked a holiday in July for me and my daughter and as soon as I booked it I freaked out and was so worried about it all that I didnt want to go. I felt exactly the same way as you do now. Well as it turned out we had a fabulous time. I was so relaxed and enjoyed it so much and the things I was worrying about at home just seemed unimportant. Disneyland Paris is magical and I'm sure you will be caught up in all the excitement and will have a great time. Enjoy x

[Roseyposey2]

Thanks Humly it's good to know I'm not alone. I am still v.anxious and I know that when the day comes I shall be nervous as it's been such a long time since I last travelled, and the first time abroad since having GAD. I just don't want that feeling to spiral out if control. I am just hoping that once I get there I'll settle down and be able to enjoy it. Only 2 more sleeps to go! Eeek xx

[Ange1]

You've managed to book the holiday...that's a giant positive step :) I'm not quite there yet but working on it. As others say keep busy and spend lots of time seeing yourself there and all the lovely things you will be doing. The flight is very short....it's more stressful and takes longer to drive across town :D . When you get there you'll be wondering why you got so worked up..as we always do...and I'm sure you'll have a great time. Enjoy ! xx