Feeling detatched, lonely and scared

[jessica780]

I could really use help or guidance on this one.
Lately my anxiety has been spiraling out. But not in the obvious way. I feel like when I start to feel happy I get numb. It like I get so over stimulated that I just feel nothing and shut down. I'm scared for me. Why do I suddenly feel so detached from myself? Like I'm just wondering around in my body but I'm not completely there. I feel alone. Because no one I know understands.
It starts off feeling like the start of an anxiety attack then goes into a feeling of detachment and numbness with an underlining feeling of sadness. Not for any reason, just for the fact that I can't seem to feel like myself.
I haven't had suicidal thoughts. I feel mentally ill. I stopped smoking weed. I only drink a glass of wine a night. I eat pretty healthy.
Can someone help tell me whats wrong with me? or if they've felt this way? I need to know I'm not alone. How do you cope?
I'm trying to do something I learned in yoga class where I stop judging my own feelings so harshly but its so hard. Let my emotions pass by like clouds with out judgment is hard when its such a new and foreign feeling.

Thank You

2261

[Cheesemonster13]

You are not alone, jessica780. When you visit these boards and read other people's stories, you discover that others too are experiencing the strange and unnerving symptoms associated with anxiety. We are all in it together, and when any of us feel in need of reassurance, we can come here to No More Panic.

I experience similar symptoms, switching from anxiety that is so severe that it makes me feel like I'm on a mental roller coaster, to that strange numbness and detachment that you write about. It frightens me too, but I think the latter might occur when our mind is so exhausted from being on high alert for prolonged periods of time, that it takes a break from it all. This is what I tell myself, anyway.

As for coping, some days are better than others. I am doing what you do, trying to live a healthy lifestyle and developing new techniques to manage my reactions to extreme anxiety.

Learning to observe your feelings rather than judge them really is hard, I think, because it has become an entrenched habit to analyse our feelings in order to "control" them. Just letting them happen feels unnatural and scary. I am persevering because, although I am rubbish at meditating, what little I do does seem to help. Now I am practising mindfulness at every opportunity - when I'm brushing my teeth, exercising, eating, etc. It feels like a constructive way to cope with the symptoms of extreme anxiety.

Hope this helps :)

[jessica780]

Thank You so much for your reply. It means the world to hear that I'm not alone and I'm not going completely mental. I just hate feeling so helpless. Its also hard since I have a boyfriend and I don't want him to worry about me . But at the same time it does occasionally interfere with our relationship.
Thank you for shedding light on my darkness . It is much appreciated.

[nantonan]

We are all feeling the same as you, most of us have more or less the same mixture of symptoms and frightening for us all. I don`t share much with me husband although he knows about the panic attacks I don`t think he can fully understand how we feel. I have nothing to worry about, so am very lucky and that makes me cross with myself for feeling the way I do. Normally I am baking and cooking but have lost all interest this week as I have no appetite of the inclination to do anything, except cry ! How pathetic is that !Thank goodness for this site as we know we are not alone and no one thinks, pull yourself together woman. Hope you feel better soon

[Gonagetbeta]

I can relate with this, I usually try and engross my self in something to distract myself, have a conversation with some one and really focus on the conversation and what the other person is saying. Sometimes even doing a complicated task can distract you. I have improved a lot since doing this, I think its like a roller coaster the more you go on it and accept it and keep going through the motions the more the intensity lessens. Just so you know the symptoms I go through are looking at my body and thinking it is abnormal and weird, looking in the mirror and not recognising myself even though I know Iam looking at myself, depressed self engrossed thoughts like everyone around me is weird the world around me is unreal or made up, I also question how did I get to this stage in my life (such as the evolution of my body from a child) these thoughts make me feel scared, confused. I will look at a baby and think I was like that once upon a time and now Iam me. I know it sounds weird and irrational, buts its just like my mind cannot grasp it even though I know its normal and apart of life.

[Its-so-fluffy]

Please help me. I feel so lost. I can't stop crying and the anxiety is a physical ache in my stomach. It's Christmas and I'm supposed to be happy with everybody but I feel detached, lost and the feeling in my stomach is unbearable. How do I lift my full
Stomach ache :( please help?

Thinking of you on this Christmas day hun.
I had anxiety so bad I had a stomach ache because I couldn't eat. Please make sure to eat even if you just pick at it. I felt so much better after eating a bit.

Have you tried listening to a relaxation video on youtube? I find these ASMR videos brilliant for just switching off for 20 mins to an hour.

Best of wishes

[Its-so-fluffy]

The fact that you've bothered to reply on Christmas Day has really made my day. I do feel better after a little bit of food, and will definitely try the vudeos. I was having a really panicked moment when I wrote that before. It's so so so lovely that someone understands, like I can't tell you. I've such a big family and they wouldn't understand; generally a "snap out of it" response.
Thank so so much for caring; it means more than you'll ever know
Jenna

There is always someone out there for you. Even if it is just one person. One is infinitely more than none. I will try to beam some positive thoughts your way. reply any time you want to talk.

Hugs from england