hazmatz
04-01-15, 10:43
I apologize for the long post but I really need some help.
I live with my dad and my stepmom. A little over a year ago I started having anxiety and panic attacks and tried my best to work through it but it forced me to quit my job in fast food because it was too stressful. Now I've been unemployed since then and my dad keeps passive aggressively telling me to get a job. I really want to but most no-experience-required jobs are demanding and require me to interact with others (I have pretty bad social anxiety too, talking to strangers / co-workers gives me a lot of mental angst). I found a few that I applied for (computer shop, movie theatre staff) but both were denied by HR.
It's very clear that I need therapy and I know it's effective because at one point I was going to a CBT therapist and it was working wonders. But then somewhere my dad read that gluten could cause anxiety and he replaced everything in the house with gluten free foods. I thought it was working but at the time I was also withdrawing from 7 months use of benzodiazepines, so it's much more likely that that's the reason my anxiety was getting better.
But now I've reached a plateau that I believe can only be surpassed with therapy. I've asked my dad to schedule appointments for me (I obviously can't afford it) but he keeps saying "well you have to stop eating gluten completely that's what's causing your anxiety" (I cheat maybe once a week after being strictly gluten free for an entire year) and sometimes I get really pissed because he doesn't understand my anxiety at all and he also fails to understand that it's probably caused by him and my mom being shitty parents when I was a child; abandoning us and abusing us and doing drugs and going to jail and starving us yadayadayada but that's a whole different story.
I'm stuck in this situation and the one thing I really wanna do is just move out with some supportive friends and work a job that isn't too overwhelming for me. So I need some advice. Anything is appreciated.
I live with my dad and my stepmom. A little over a year ago I started having anxiety and panic attacks and tried my best to work through it but it forced me to quit my job in fast food because it was too stressful. Now I've been unemployed since then and my dad keeps passive aggressively telling me to get a job. I really want to but most no-experience-required jobs are demanding and require me to interact with others (I have pretty bad social anxiety too, talking to strangers / co-workers gives me a lot of mental angst). I found a few that I applied for (computer shop, movie theatre staff) but both were denied by HR.
It's very clear that I need therapy and I know it's effective because at one point I was going to a CBT therapist and it was working wonders. But then somewhere my dad read that gluten could cause anxiety and he replaced everything in the house with gluten free foods. I thought it was working but at the time I was also withdrawing from 7 months use of benzodiazepines, so it's much more likely that that's the reason my anxiety was getting better.
But now I've reached a plateau that I believe can only be surpassed with therapy. I've asked my dad to schedule appointments for me (I obviously can't afford it) but he keeps saying "well you have to stop eating gluten completely that's what's causing your anxiety" (I cheat maybe once a week after being strictly gluten free for an entire year) and sometimes I get really pissed because he doesn't understand my anxiety at all and he also fails to understand that it's probably caused by him and my mom being shitty parents when I was a child; abandoning us and abusing us and doing drugs and going to jail and starving us yadayadayada but that's a whole different story.
I'm stuck in this situation and the one thing I really wanna do is just move out with some supportive friends and work a job that isn't too overwhelming for me. So I need some advice. Anything is appreciated.