russ
09-01-07, 21:18
Hi Guys, I'm new here and just wanted to introduce myself and say why I have joined. It is a bit of a long story, so I'll try and be as brief as I can.
Sadly in April last year my father passed away from Cancer. I had helped look after him in the same house for the previous two years and we had become very close, my life was his and visa-versa. Although before this I wouldn't say I was always feeling great, his death and having to spend the final few hours with him hit me very hard (I can barely stand thinking about it now).
During the later days of my dad's life my Nan also fell ill of the very same thing, bowel cancer; sadly, she also passed away a few months later.
At first the passing of my Dad didn't appear to hit me that hard, it was a busy time and like many I threw myself into doing jobs at home, almost anything to stop thinking. However, around 6 weeks after my Dad passed on I had the feelings as if I was having a heart attack and ended up in A&E. They ran a ECG, I had blood tests, scans and a physical, all appeared fine and this was eventually put down to a painful sternum condition called Costochondritis (Tietze's Syndrome) after a follow-up GP visit (caused by a virus or over physical activity, lifting etc, which was likely considering the weeks before). I was told this would cure, and it appeared to do so after a few weeks, although this then entered the time of my Nan's passing and I'm not sure if it did cure or if I was running on adrenaline.
Again a few weeks after my Nan’s funeral I experienced chest pains. Again I went to A&E and was told the same thing as before. From last September up until this point in time (early Jan) I'm in quite a bit of pain on and off each day around the left side of my chest which is exacerbated by pressing it (it feels "weak"). I have had the tests which are clear, I've also been told at 27 and with the family having no heart issues, nor me not being overweight or a smoker, drinker or drug taker, I require no further tests (despite asking to see a cardiologist) and that in time the condition should cure itself.
Now here is where the confusion for me sets in. At the last visit to A&E before Christmas they asked the usual questions, I went back to them because I had been feeling unwell (although other family members had the flu) and I also had a tight feeling in my throat, especially around the evenings which I began to dread. The Doctor questioned me a little and said straight away he thought I was suffering anxiety; he wasn't clear whether that was in addition to or as a new diagnosis to my original diagnosis. He said he would write to my GP over this diagnosis and as yet I have not heard from or gone back to my GP.
Here is my real question, while I can appreciate the last few months have brought about anxiety, I don't actually feel as though I'm anxious when I have the pains and throat feelings, so can anxiety be subconscious? I don't understand how I can awake feeling anxious after sleeping? Nor did I actually realise anxiety could cause such physical ongoing pains, however, upon reading a little more clearly a chemical or emotional build-up can come out in a physical way.
Really I'm lost where to go from here. Has anyone had a reaction to grief like this? Has that brought on my anxiety? Could the chest pains be the route of anxiety or a symptom? I still feel very emotional and now almost petrified of dying and what is after death or being on my own or in a situation where I may collapse with no family member close, sounds stupid I know, but I put this down to seeing the inside of a hospital so much where also the worst case always appeared to come true.
The recent few months have just left me feeling so low, I've lost close relatives and I'm in pain and I just have no quality of life right now. In addition I haven't worked for years and with the chest pains I just cannot see me being able to do a job right now.
Should I go back to the doctors? How do I go about getting over these feelings? I feel if only the pain would stop I could start to move
Sadly in April last year my father passed away from Cancer. I had helped look after him in the same house for the previous two years and we had become very close, my life was his and visa-versa. Although before this I wouldn't say I was always feeling great, his death and having to spend the final few hours with him hit me very hard (I can barely stand thinking about it now).
During the later days of my dad's life my Nan also fell ill of the very same thing, bowel cancer; sadly, she also passed away a few months later.
At first the passing of my Dad didn't appear to hit me that hard, it was a busy time and like many I threw myself into doing jobs at home, almost anything to stop thinking. However, around 6 weeks after my Dad passed on I had the feelings as if I was having a heart attack and ended up in A&E. They ran a ECG, I had blood tests, scans and a physical, all appeared fine and this was eventually put down to a painful sternum condition called Costochondritis (Tietze's Syndrome) after a follow-up GP visit (caused by a virus or over physical activity, lifting etc, which was likely considering the weeks before). I was told this would cure, and it appeared to do so after a few weeks, although this then entered the time of my Nan's passing and I'm not sure if it did cure or if I was running on adrenaline.
Again a few weeks after my Nan’s funeral I experienced chest pains. Again I went to A&E and was told the same thing as before. From last September up until this point in time (early Jan) I'm in quite a bit of pain on and off each day around the left side of my chest which is exacerbated by pressing it (it feels "weak"). I have had the tests which are clear, I've also been told at 27 and with the family having no heart issues, nor me not being overweight or a smoker, drinker or drug taker, I require no further tests (despite asking to see a cardiologist) and that in time the condition should cure itself.
Now here is where the confusion for me sets in. At the last visit to A&E before Christmas they asked the usual questions, I went back to them because I had been feeling unwell (although other family members had the flu) and I also had a tight feeling in my throat, especially around the evenings which I began to dread. The Doctor questioned me a little and said straight away he thought I was suffering anxiety; he wasn't clear whether that was in addition to or as a new diagnosis to my original diagnosis. He said he would write to my GP over this diagnosis and as yet I have not heard from or gone back to my GP.
Here is my real question, while I can appreciate the last few months have brought about anxiety, I don't actually feel as though I'm anxious when I have the pains and throat feelings, so can anxiety be subconscious? I don't understand how I can awake feeling anxious after sleeping? Nor did I actually realise anxiety could cause such physical ongoing pains, however, upon reading a little more clearly a chemical or emotional build-up can come out in a physical way.
Really I'm lost where to go from here. Has anyone had a reaction to grief like this? Has that brought on my anxiety? Could the chest pains be the route of anxiety or a symptom? I still feel very emotional and now almost petrified of dying and what is after death or being on my own or in a situation where I may collapse with no family member close, sounds stupid I know, but I put this down to seeing the inside of a hospital so much where also the worst case always appeared to come true.
The recent few months have just left me feeling so low, I've lost close relatives and I'm in pain and I just have no quality of life right now. In addition I haven't worked for years and with the chest pains I just cannot see me being able to do a job right now.
Should I go back to the doctors? How do I go about getting over these feelings? I feel if only the pain would stop I could start to move