Too scared to book my wedding....

[Mrschurchill]

So I'm in the turmoil of a huge ovarian cancer fear at the moment (frequent urination is slowly killing me) and I'm looking to book my wedding at the end of March to get married in Feb 2017!
I honestly don't think I'll see 2017 (how depressing I know!) and Im so scared to book as I'm so convinced I won't live to see it. :-(

I think I've hit my lowest point ever with HA. It's gripped me in every way. This Cancer that I'm so convinced is ravaging through my body is consuming my every waking moment. I can't do it anymore... I just can't.

[susie1]

The trouble with HA is that you have a symptom and focus on that completely. I have been convinced of similar and been weeing all day long. I did not have Ovarian cancer. How long have you had this and have you seen a GP. Could be a urine infection or just simply anxiety. BOOK your wedding. You can't let HA rob you of that. I know you can't see that far ahead but this symptom will go

[Mrschurchill]

I had the symptom first at the end of Nov. It eventually passed and I qas feelinh ok (about OC at least) and then 2 days ago boom there it is again! I'm really struggling to see past just HA. I can't find a way out :(

[susie1]

It may be instititial cystitis which I think I had. I had cycoscopy, 24 hour urine tests and a scan. All normal but I felt like something was pressing on
my bladder 24 /7/ It really was anxiety affecting my body

[Mrschurchill]

Hi susie, yeah that's what it feels like. Like something pressing on it. In my mind it's a huge ovarian tumour :( I'm just not strong enough to deal with this. I want to enjoy my life! I look back at my past HA's and can laugh at how stressed I got myself and can't believe I allowed myself to be so worried but why can't I shake it in the present! I've been thoroughly convinced of bowel and Breast Cancer in the last 6 months (like 100% no doubt about it) and right now because this is all I'm thinking about I'm in no way worried about either of them!!! Can't quite believe HA sometimes. It's a horrible illness

[AnnieMags]

I do feel for you, it is a horrible never-ending worry and anxiety when you start obsessing over a particular symptom and possible illness. Try to take a step back and be objective. The symptoms you describe could be any number of innocent conditions - ovarian cancer is WAY down the list of possibilities - and does not even make the list of probabilities, I promise you. There is no reason to think that you have ovarian cancer. To stop this downward spiral you are on, ask your GP for a pelvic ultrasound - explain how terrifed you are and how it is ruining your life - and put your mind at rest once and for all. Book that venue and have a fabulous wedding - I wish you every happiness. Best wishes from Annie :hugs:

[MRS STRESS ED]

GO AND BOOK YOUR WEDDING DONT LET ANXIETY TAKE THIS AWAY FROM YOU
Its anxiety love it causes alsorts of symptoms and if you focus on ovarian cancer so will your anxiety it will mimic symptoms don't let it take something so special away and if we all thought like that love no one would plan anything go and book it ,last year I had a ovarian cancer scare and I had a lot problems had two biopsies and guess what it was clear please believe you will be okay xxxx

[Fishmanpa]

The biggest regrets in life are not about the chances we take. They're about the chances we don't take.

If you allow your anxiety to control your life, it will be something you'll regret the rest of your life. Please don't allow that to happen!

Positive thoughts

[Starman]

Frequent urination is a symptom of anxiey, I have had this too.

http://www.anxietycentre.com/anxiety-symptoms/urgent-or-frequent-urination.shtml

[Mrschurchill]

Thank you everyone for your encouragement. I'm seeing my GP on Wednesday to discuss a plan. I was doing my online CBT last night and it was helping, I just have this little devil on my shoulder say 'ahhhhh what if?!'
I've not tried medication and don't really want to go down that route but I am starting to think that might be my only option. I'm at a low low place at the min and beginning to feel there is no escape x

[wnsos]

That little devil gets quieter and quieter the more you practice CBT, I promise. it's mega hard at first, I couldn't meditate or practice mindfulness because of it but it does eventually quieten. Keep at it xxx

Also if you do go down the medication route, it's not always a bad thing to help with. CBT combined with it is actually a really good plan of attack. And you don't have to be on medication forever.

[Mrschurchill]

Thanks WNSOS - I do feel like it I will never stop having these thoughts but I'm glad that if I continue then it will be begin to decrease. For once I'm looking forward to seeing my doctor and working out a solution.

I am going to book my wedding though. How can I die if I'm not even living! F U Anxiety!!