As bad as it gets...rock bottom

[JustJules]

Well here i am in Blackpool....30 mins from home...walking along the front trying to sort my head out....couldnt face work....dont want to spk to anyone..have got tel app with GP later to ask why i have to have an mri following a colonoscopy on new years eve...but wont b able to take call becsuse of fear of what she will tell me..cancer etc...how the hell have i got into this state??? cant face mri..no way...so therefore stupid and hopele
ss...family just dont understand the fear...dont want to go home later but feel so bad as will worry everyone. even calle in at a private mental hosp earlier but too expensive....cant go on like this...sorry to wail on but feeling in a really bad place and sick of keeping a face on for people.

[Mrschurchill]

Didn't want to read and run. I know how you feel. I'm in a bad place at the moment with me HA. You're not alone, we are all in this together! xx

[wnsos]

Keep your head up, jules. Best you can is all you need. Take a deep breath and watch the sea for a little. Let us know how the phone call goes? I hope it's alright. It'll help to know rather than to keep worrying xx

[Serenity1990]

There could be all manner of reasons, please don't focus on one of the more unlikely ones.