Ollie28
22-01-15, 16:19
Can't take it much more! Can't take it much more! Feels like my heads not got enough blood flowing in it the pains are horrible, it's not like head ach pain it's like a crushing crunhing inwards pain. Feel like I've no connection between thoughts and actions or feelings, I feel like this 24 and i can't take much more.
I know everyone on here's got there own problems I just needed to air out how I feel I can't get out of this hole.
Does this sound right for "mental health" ...... I'm having no thoughts about people and things 24/7 I feel trapped in this state - no "outwards thoughts " naturally are being produced so no ideas to do things or act, I can be in work and go all day struggling to do my job and think then realise and tell myself "I havnt thought about my kids all day not only that I've not even felt to think about them" so it's like my natural thinking pattern has changed in Some way and I can't get out of it.
I have to consciously tell myself to think so why I'm doing that I'm concentrating on trying so I cant do it it physically hurts but the pains like there's no blood in that part of my brain that usually takes in information and I feel it n digest it n can intelligently act upon it, im stuck in hell, I know I've shared this many of times i just don't know what to do no more I feel trapped away from my kids and family I miss them so so much I miss feeling emotional attachment I miss being able to think powerful and normal without feeling like I have a mental block in place 24/7. I shouldn't have to try to tell myself to think about my kids it I don't do that I won't. I'm fed up of telling myself to think about things that would naturally flow through my head.
When I change thought pattern too from one subject to another it physically hurts and I get confused and loss of awareness.
Am I stuck this way? Will my mind ever open back up and let me feel me again?
Is it anxiety really? Didn't know it can be so life destroying and shattering.
Feels like my minds & body has somehow turned inwards on itself and I'm drowning!!!!
---------- Post added at 15:54 ---------- Previous post was at 15:18 ----------
In agony and confused ..... I'm in someone's house now trying to put a mirror up after a fireplace installation I can't remember where I up to what it is I'm trying to do I know what I have to do there's just no feeling or cogs moving to do it, I'm doing things out of order I'm then constantly reminding myself what I'm doing or trying to do. Pain all in the back too part of my head. My body is shaking trembling like it's trying to open because I'm trying to think or concentrate. I can't cope like this. I can't picture things either in my mind if I try tell myself picture something or someone I cant do it I can't visualise it. I can think to myself inwards all day long but the more I do more inwards I go I just don't have the natural open feeling and thoughts that go with it - someone please help me. If I look as far as I can focus and strair it's like its not going in my minds locked shut physically and mentally. I feel like I'm in the wrong side of my thoughts and body and the world, it's not DP, I
I can't feel aware of even my body I can't think or feel about it. Arrrrrrr!!! I'm losing my mind
---------- Post added at 16:19 ---------- Previous post was at 15:54 ----------
One more thing too - it feels like I'm not learning nothing new at all like I can't feel satisfied Im aware of something, I know I am but the feeling I'm trapped in feels like I'm not and can't. I can't recall things I've done or seen today without really really really trying things I could of done 5 mins ago
I know everyone on here's got there own problems I just needed to air out how I feel I can't get out of this hole.
Does this sound right for "mental health" ...... I'm having no thoughts about people and things 24/7 I feel trapped in this state - no "outwards thoughts " naturally are being produced so no ideas to do things or act, I can be in work and go all day struggling to do my job and think then realise and tell myself "I havnt thought about my kids all day not only that I've not even felt to think about them" so it's like my natural thinking pattern has changed in Some way and I can't get out of it.
I have to consciously tell myself to think so why I'm doing that I'm concentrating on trying so I cant do it it physically hurts but the pains like there's no blood in that part of my brain that usually takes in information and I feel it n digest it n can intelligently act upon it, im stuck in hell, I know I've shared this many of times i just don't know what to do no more I feel trapped away from my kids and family I miss them so so much I miss feeling emotional attachment I miss being able to think powerful and normal without feeling like I have a mental block in place 24/7. I shouldn't have to try to tell myself to think about my kids it I don't do that I won't. I'm fed up of telling myself to think about things that would naturally flow through my head.
When I change thought pattern too from one subject to another it physically hurts and I get confused and loss of awareness.
Am I stuck this way? Will my mind ever open back up and let me feel me again?
Is it anxiety really? Didn't know it can be so life destroying and shattering.
Feels like my minds & body has somehow turned inwards on itself and I'm drowning!!!!
---------- Post added at 15:54 ---------- Previous post was at 15:18 ----------
In agony and confused ..... I'm in someone's house now trying to put a mirror up after a fireplace installation I can't remember where I up to what it is I'm trying to do I know what I have to do there's just no feeling or cogs moving to do it, I'm doing things out of order I'm then constantly reminding myself what I'm doing or trying to do. Pain all in the back too part of my head. My body is shaking trembling like it's trying to open because I'm trying to think or concentrate. I can't cope like this. I can't picture things either in my mind if I try tell myself picture something or someone I cant do it I can't visualise it. I can think to myself inwards all day long but the more I do more inwards I go I just don't have the natural open feeling and thoughts that go with it - someone please help me. If I look as far as I can focus and strair it's like its not going in my minds locked shut physically and mentally. I feel like I'm in the wrong side of my thoughts and body and the world, it's not DP, I
I can't feel aware of even my body I can't think or feel about it. Arrrrrrr!!! I'm losing my mind
---------- Post added at 16:19 ---------- Previous post was at 15:54 ----------
One more thing too - it feels like I'm not learning nothing new at all like I can't feel satisfied Im aware of something, I know I am but the feeling I'm trapped in feels like I'm not and can't. I can't recall things I've done or seen today without really really really trying things I could of done 5 mins ago