View Full Version : Someone, Somewhere - Please help :( Going out of my mind with Lymph Nodes!!!!!!
I am desperately hoping that somebody somewhere can try and help put my mind at rest. I am new on here and this is my first post.
I am quite literally going out of mind right now. I have a swollen lymph node on the left hand side of my neck, just next to the collar bone - It isn't painful, just irritating because I can feel it there all the time (especially when I turn my head in a particular direction, kind of feels like it is bulging)
I am convinced right now that I have Lymphoma and I have genuinely never felt more terrified in my whole life. I saw my doctor, however he was originally reluctant to give me blood tests and referred to it as 'just a bit swollen' After pushing now for the past 2 months I have eventually seen another doctor who has given me blood tests today - Alongside this she has also booked me in at the local hospital for an ultrasound scan and a needle biopsy. I am so so so scared. I am desperate for some kind or reassurance? Has anyone ever had this? Just one lump in the left hand side - Kind of 'spongey' almost and moveable. But it is considerably bigger than the nodes in the right hand side of my neck, possibly double the size. I have had 2 little cold over christmas, but nothing to shout about.
Please please help me. I feel so alone. I try to speak to my partner / parents however I think they are sick of me talking about it so im just bottling it all up inside. Im driving myself insane!!!! D: D:
Is it a bad sign to have to go for a biopsy? In my mind this definitely means they suspect I have cancer. I am so so scared. Please help me!:weep::weep:
Hi,
Years ago I convinced myself I had mouth cancer, I genuinely had 3/4 symptoms of it. So like you I went to the doctors who dismissed it as nothing. I was convinced that they had missed something. I seen another 2 doctors and was referred as they could see how much this was bothering me, but it did turn out to be nothing. It sounds like they have done similar with you, they are sending you as you have requested it and by the sounds of it as a precaution. I know it's hard but the first thing is to try and calm down. Also I find bottling it up often makes it worse, my wife although she couldn't understand why I thought 3 doctors were wrong was great. talk to your partner it will help. Finally there could be a million and one things it could be but with anxiety we automatically assume it the worse one. I hope you get sorted. This forum has lots of good helpful people who understand and will offer help and advice were possible.
Thanks Bulldog
I think I have got myself to a stage where I can see no other option but the worse case scenario. I torture myself by looking at Lymphoma sites :weep: I don't know why I do this! I just hope & prey my bloods come back normal - At least that is something I suppose but I won't find out until next week - Then it will be time to start panicking about the needle biopsy ............................. :wacko:
As you will know looking at the websites is not a great idea as no good will come of it, it will only increase the worry. The key to dealing with the anxiety is distraction, when you start to feel the anxiety or panic coming on change what your doing. This might sound daft but tell your anxiety "go away" or "I don't need you". Try and keep your mind busy. I have suffered with anxiety and panic attacks for around 14 years. But only recently with the help of this forum I have started to understand it. I hope your bloods come back fine and that should hopefully ease your mind a bit.
venusbluejeans
30-01-15, 10:56
Hi
This is just a courtesy reply to let you know that your post was moved from its original place to a sub-forum that is more relevant to your problem.
This is nothing personal - it just enables us to keep posts about the same problems in the relevant forums so other members with any experience with the issues can find them more easily.
Is it a bad sign to have to go for a biopsy? In my mind this definitely means they suspect I have cancer. I am so so scared. Please help me!:weep::weep:
Had a similar panic lately for a lump in my boob, they did a biopsy, I panicked, people on here assured me that they do it just to be sure as it is the most accurate test. Imagine how much more stressful it would be for you if you kept having appointments and kept being invited back for more tests with no answers, it's better that they do it all at once so that they can give you a definite answer. Also, remember that you pushed for the tests, so the doctor is just making sure you get what you asked for i.e. absolute clarification.
P.S. my biopsy was totally fine, I suspect most are. Stay strong :hugs:
Serenity1990
30-01-15, 14:37
Lymph nodes are meant to come up and protrude, that's sort of how they work. Glad to hear your lymphatic system is working so well!
What on earth makes you think you have Lymphoma?
Hi Looloo, hope you're feeling a bit better. I just wanted to tell you that biopsy is definitely not a bad sign. I had biopsies three times. Once there was a lump in my breast, was a big one, but the doctor told me it's definitely benign, it was removed and taken to biopsy anyway because it's the protocol.
I had an endoscopy and they took biopsies from my esophagus although there was nothing wrong there. I still haven't got the results and I know they will come back negative as the practitioner nurse told me so and they just do it in every endoscopy.
I had a colposcopy and had biopsies during as well.
You know I have swollen lymph nodes in my groin, I waited for 2 weeks as the doctor told me so and after 2 weeks she told me to wait for another two weeks. If they don't go down she will send me for an ultrasound and probably biopsy too. I'm not worried. You shouldn't be worried either.
I'm guessing you're feeling better now, if you panic please read the message I sent you again rather than reading patient stories, it will not help you at all and you know it. x
Thankyou all for your responses
Hi Serenity :) The reason I am so worried is because as far as I was aware lymph nodes are only supposed to 'swell' when there is a sign of infection? I can't understand why only my 1 lymph node is swollen and all the others are normal / undetectable .. I know it's my own stupid fault for looking at 'Dr Google' whose answer to pretty much everything is 'cancer' .. It just scares me so much as I can feel it protruding in my neck - I am trying not to touch it as I know that this can irritate it and inflame the node & result in more swelling.
Mindknot - I suppose you are right! I have asked and asked for more tests, and now they are giving them to me I am thinking 'Oh my god, why are they giving me more tests?! There must be something wrong!' which is silly I know .. I am glad to hear that your biopsy came back all clear - Did it hurt at all?
Thankyou all of you, you are the only thing keeping me sane right now :hugs:xxx
I've got one uncomfortable swollen lymph node in my neck too. Doctor said they can stay swollen for a while even after a very mild cold. He said if it's moveable and not hard it's nothing to worry about. Told me to go back in a month if still there but not concerned at all.
Sound like yours is from the colds you had too. It's the anxiety that's making you panic over something tiny.. Try not to worry x
Mindknot - I suppose you are right! I have asked and asked for more tests, and now they are giving them to me I am thinking 'Oh my god, why are they giving me more tests?! There must be something wrong!' which is silly I know .. I am glad to hear that your biopsy came back all clear - Did it hurt at all?
Thankyou all of you, you are the only thing keeping me sane right now :hugs:xxx
I think they use a very fine needle for a lymph node test, which is a bit different to what I had (I needed local anesthetic), but it shouldn't hurt, I imagine it will feel no different to an injection, and may just ache a bit like a bruise afterward. You'll be fine! :)
Hi LooLoo,
I replied to your other post in "Symptoms" but I'll post here as well.
Cancer is an uncontrolled growth of abnormal cells It doesn't come and go nor does it stop once it starts. I had head and neck cancer, Stage IV. I had nodes that were swollen. They were hard and immovable. It was VERY obvious. The ENT didn't need an ultrasound to find the node to biopsy.
To answer your question, a FNAB doesn't really hurt. It's not unlike any needle you would get. A pinch and a bit uncomfortable is all. The area/node may be a little sore the next day.
As far as the node goes? My understanding is you pushed for the testing as one doctor didn't feel it was necessary. Your reaction is quite typical of someone who suffers from HA. The doctor is doing what a doctor is supposed to do in ruling out anything sinister. You've also been poking and prodding which irritates the node and can cause it to remain swollen. Based on your posts and the fact that 99.9% of the fears on the site don't turn out to be anything sinister, I would lean toward a similar result.
Do what you can to stop poking and prodding, PLEASE stay away from the cancer sites and don't post on them with your fears. It feeds the dragon and is disrespectful to those fighting the battle. Do the same with Dr. Google. Nothing good ever comes out of that (unless you're searching recipes :) ). Lastly, speak to your doctor about a referral for therapy, CBT or meds. Don't allow the dragon to control your life.
Positive thoughts
I had a swollen lymph node on the left side of my neck 9 years ago and I too was convinced I had lymphoma. I was sent for ultrasound and afterward sent to a specialist for biopsy. He felt it moved it and sent me away without further testing. Surprisingly I accepted his assessment. 9 years later it's still there and it flares up when I'm sick or have sinus issues. He told me they can sometimes enlarge and never completely go down.
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