PDA

View Full Version : Social Anxiety and Depression: My Story



mfmycm
12-01-07, 15:40
Here is my story: I have always been nervous about speaking in public and during meetings but have managed to overcome these fears for the most part. About 2 years ago I started to notice my voice was cracking a little when I was speaking on the phone. Well, being a little compulsive, I began to focus on the issue and before too long it became a big issue and every time I would speak would become a test to see if I could speak like a normal person. Well this just added to the stress of speaking in public. Full blown anxiety set in and I was worried 24/7 about my ability to speak. I would get severe muscle tension in my neck and to compensate I would strain my voice to just get words out. Before too long my throat was sore and that just reinforced that I have a problem speaking. I would get shortness of breath and the adrenalie rush during the flight/fight respone. Unable to get through this episode and not sure where it was headed eventually took a toll on me emotionally and I had bouts of depression combined with anxiety. After some therapy and a short period on medication the emotional swings have stopped for the most part but still battling the anxiety of speaking. At this point I am convinced that I have forgotten how to speak properly and feel out of place when I am in public. Would appreciate any thoughts/comments on overcoming social anxiety and techniques that people have used. Thanks for reading my story.

yorkylover
12-01-07, 17:50
Hi and welcome,you will get lots of support and advise here.;)

Ellen XX

Melina
12-01-07, 18:34
Hi there,
you are definately not alone with this. this is exactly what i have developed over the years which had grown and become much worse when I was working because it was a big "no no" not to be able to speak well, ariculately etc (ie recruitment) and consultants would constantly make fun of any consultant OR candidate/client who "could not talk". I got to the point of extreme social anxiety because of this problem and I am too now convinced that I cannot talk properly. When in situations where I had to socialise (ie work committments) I was so tied up in knots, panicked and anxious that I would mumble and mix my words up, then I would see colleagues sniggering and coughing deliberately which of course made me worse!

I have literally just started reading "Overcoming Social Anxiety" (forgotton the name of the author, but I brought it off Amazon.co.uk last week - it is based on CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) only on the 10th page so not experienced/recognised the benefits yet. The 1st few pages have been very reassuring though because the book highlights the symptons and effects of social anxiety (linking into impacts on behaviour, physcial symptoms etc), until now, I had thought I was the only person on the planet with this problem!.

Now that I have the time, (since leaving work) I am determined to get to the bottom of this, and find out how on earth I developed it and how I can overcome it, it has impacted my life so negatively and holds me back in so many ways. I've heard that lifecoaching can help and group sessions on confidence, socialising events for those with specific social phobia etc I've just started to research these and , so please feel free to PM over the coming weeks and I will be happy to let you know what I find out in terms of techniques etc

mfmycm
12-01-07, 18:52
Thanks for your advice Melinda. I know exacly what you mean. I am a consultant in the States, so much of my job is related to making presentations and speeches. The anxiety I feel before and during the speech is horrible. I have found a book by Tara Brach called "Radical Acceptance" that has been a great help in calming my nerves and helping me "center myself." I am just glad that I found this forum. Look forward to learning from you and others on this site.