An Hour In The Life Of

[Vigilante]

Ok, I have been that bad today that I decided to write down everything for 1 hour, who can relate to this?

5:40 pm - Tested my smile in window reflection, to check if is is still even.
5:42 pm - Re-checked smile because my lip and face feels twitchy
5:46 pm - checked to see if I can still whistle.
5:49 pm - Stomach feels strange when I laughed, not sure if it is spasming, or a knoted like feel or perhaps even twisted feeling?
5:52 pm - Thinking is stomach and backache oddness due to inner twitching and spasms and will I lose control of my toilet habbits?
5:54 pm - Feel slightly sick and dizzy.
5:56 pm - I can hear my heart beat.
5:59 pm - Right side of chest is tight, twitchy and vibrating
6:02 pm - Feel flutter and ache in middle of chest.
6:03 pm - My calfs are still twitching away same as the last 13 days, like having worms under my skin.
6:05 pm - Can feel my mid back flutter, spasm, vibrate same place as pain too....
6:08 pm - Did some self neuro checks, feet together/eyes closed, bit wobbly but balance ok, arms held out in front closed eyes no movement, touched end of nose with a finger off each hand, seemed ok.
checked walking, Heel to toe, walk on toes, walk on heels, seems fine too.
6:10 pm - Left leg is twitching on the outer side of my knee cap.
6:14 pm - Right arm is trembling when I;m leaning on it.
6:16 pm- Feeling tired.
6:17 pm - upper back twiitching.
6:20 pm - Whole body feels shaky, twitchy, what the hell is going on? a seizure?
6:21 pm - Checked blood pressure, 145/84, heart rate 90 bpm
6:24 pm - Can feel my pulse everywhere on body, even putting my finger tips on my forehead can easily feel it....!
6:26-6:45 - sat on kitchen floor yawning

Well there it is, a snapshop of my current life, still sat here thinking its brain tumour, ms, als some other neuro problem.

Who can relate to this.

[flutterbuy]

this post made me cry, it really hits home just how much we go through in one tiny hour let alone a day a week or a month, how hard it is and how much we think about every sensation we feel and worry about it, its just so much to cope with, I really do think this post could help non sufferers understand just a little of what we go through, I say a little as they can never understand the anxiety that goes with unless they experience it, but I can tell you this is so similar to an hour in my life, thank you for sharing xx

[popejoan]

I am exactly the same! My left finger is swollen because I tested over and over if I can open the bathroom door with it. Have all the symptoms you have, I'm obsessed with my tongue now and can see it twitch. I'm so sorry your feeling like this, I can totally relate. I have huge ALS fears and ruining my life. You are not alone.

[Vigilante]

Hope I didnt make you upset Flutter, I thought I would try and write it down to maybe help hammer it home to myself exactly what I'm like and what I'm doing, its this paradox that gets to me, I tell myself I am not anxious yet I have symptoms, well that 1 hour totally proves I am anxious.

[flutterbuy]

no you didn't upset me hun :) it just hit home what we go through and made me emotional, im the same I swear im not anxious but my constant thoughts of health worries and symptoms say different plus it doesn't help having cold after cold and having a sinus infection and feeling very run down, those symptoms are making me feel awful and jittery :( xx

[mnaha]

WOW I could have written this post.. just amazing. the similarities.

[Fishmanpa]

Very interesting as it shows how totally self consuming, hyper aware and OCD the HA sufferer can be and is.

Positive thoughts

[trish1955]

it made me smile in parts the bit about looking in window smil to see if it still straight somthing i would do and the test you do touching end of nose i have just done it myself before reading this i have sufferd for forty years decided to give med ago in august last year guess what nothing changed xxxx

[KayeS]

I have had any many many hours/days like this too. Especially the whole self testing thing... gosh I do that a lot.

This is why this community is important. So that we can all share our experiences like this to show that we are not alone, and that not everything means there is something wrong.