Murdo
24-02-15, 21:45
Hi everyone, I'm new to the forum.
I am a long-term sufferer of PTSD which mostly manifest in chronic anxiety (panic) attacks.
I have been prescribed Half Inderal LA 80mg Capsules (now discontinued and I now get "Half Beta-Prograne 80mg Sustained Release Capsules" [Propranolol Hydrochloride 80mg] instead), and Diazepam 5mg X3 daily, since 1998.
I had undergone a fairly rigorous course of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy for 52 weeks, finishing up in 2007, at which time I was prescribed "Cipralex®" and then Citalopram along with the Propranolol and Diazepam. I honestly found that the Citalopram was of no benefit to me unfortunately, for the anxiety / PTSD, and the side effects were awful for the entire year of taking them; (dry mouth, feeling MORE anxious, nausea, decreased appetite, low sex drive), without getting any helpful therapeutic benefit. In short, after giving the Citalopram a fair chance for a year, I just decided to take myself off them, as I had finished an intensive FIFTY TWO week course of CBT. I withdrew from the Citalopram, "cold turkey" if you like. It was horrible... it felt like there was an electrical storm in my head for a good few days. I've often seen these described as "brain zaps", which describes the sensation quite well.
I had been managing better with my anxiety without the SSRI Citalopram, as the side effects outweighed the benefits (I honestly never found any benefit from them, unfortunately, and a year was a long enough time to decide that they simply were not benefitting me).
Fast forward almost 8 years to present, I have certainly had my ups and downs with anxiety attacks and PTSD, with some very severe attacks in this time. Over 4 months ago, I had the most severe anxiety attack that I have had in 2 and a half years, and very worryingly I had this in my home, with no obvious trigger to me. In short, this has had a catastrophic effect where I have been pretty much developed agoraphobia once again, as the anxiety attacks have really manifested in themselves, where I am constantly feeling anxious, and I am continually getting really debilitating anxiety attacks, which leave me a gibbering wreck, curled up in a ball on the ground. I have lost 30lbs in this last 4 months, which is very worrying also, as I am just a shadow of my former self. I have seen my doctor a lot in this period and have had just about every physical test carried out on me (all physical tests; blood tests, ECG, Xrays, ultrasound etc. came back negative), and have been referred to my local primary care mental health liaison service. Things were quite slow moving as they are very busy, but I finally got to see a Psychiatric doctor last week for a medication review and had been added Mirtazapine / Zispin 15mg to be taken at night for 3 weeks, which on evaluation can be increased to 30mg at 3 weeks and in turn a max dose of 45mg can be prescribed at 6 weeks.
However, I have been having some very undesirable side effects with the Mirtazapine / Zispin even at 15mg this last 2 days especially. The first night, it made me very tired and I had to go to bed within about 20 minutes of taking the first one. I kind of got the sensation of my throat swelling and that horrible taste in my mouth after the first one, but fell asleep quite quickly the first night, slept well (apart from waking in the middle of the night with my tshirt soaked through in sweat) and woke up the next day feeling very groggy. This was no big concern, after what I had been through previously for 4 months with the anxiety attacks. The sedative effects seemed to decrease the last 2 nights, and by the 3rd day taking Mirtazapine / Zispin, I was getting a massive headache after taking it. This last 2 days, as well as the numb mouth and lips with horrible taste in my mouth, unfortunately I have felt "increased" anxiety, and on waking after what little sleep I get and terrible vivid nightmares, as well as the sweats. I was having lots of racing thoughts that was very unusual for me, on waking, while still groggy. For example when my eyes were closed I could see an image like a jumper or whatever, and then it would be distorted by a "bouncy ball" bouncing up and down extremely rapidly.
Another racing thought I had when my eyes were closed, was of a metal spring, which in this intrusive thought, I could see the momentum of the spring coil from one side to the other very rapidly, and all of a sudden in the thought, it seemed to have attached itself to a rib above and below my heart, and the momentum of the coiling was pulsating really fast from one side to the other. This made me very anxious, and as much as I tried to put the thought out of my mind, it seemed to stay, even though I would tell myself it was just a stupid passing thought. I had to open my eyes and sit up in bed and exercise deep abdominal breathing exercises to make it stop. I have never experienced anything quite like this before.
It was very windy outside, so I am not sure if this was the "inspiration" to the next intrusive thought, which was of particles and objects that I visualised when my eyes were closed trying to rest, either being blown across, from right to left, or simply the particles themselves being blown very fast.
Again on waking this morning after very little, broken sleep, and 3 tshirt changes, all sweated right through, I again had terrible anxiety all day with another strange sensation that I had not experienced before today. It was as if someone was constantly shaking a metal tin box full of iron-filings / ball-bearings inside my head, and feeling really uncomfortably over-stimulated, which left me feeling like I drank about 5 cups of strong coffee, causing the anxiety to go through the roof with racing-heart, dry mouth, nauseous, no appetite and all that goes with severe anxiety. That is the effect that the Mirtazapine / Zispin seems to be having on me at the minute, and I am wondering should I continue with it, and if anyone else had experienced any of these symptoms at the early stages? I feel like I have lost too much weight already, and that I can't afford to get much lower than this just now, until I am built up a little bit. Should I take tonights 15mg dose of Mirtazapine / Zispin, or leave it for tonight and wait to hopefully hear back from the Psychiatric doctor who prescribed the Mirtazapine / Zispin, and wait to hear what they say, in regard to me continuing to take the Mirtazapine / Zispin or to stop now? Your suggestions are most welcome, and sorry for such a long-winded introductory post.
Hoping to hear from you all with your experiences / views, and many thanks in advance.
I am a long-term sufferer of PTSD which mostly manifest in chronic anxiety (panic) attacks.
I have been prescribed Half Inderal LA 80mg Capsules (now discontinued and I now get "Half Beta-Prograne 80mg Sustained Release Capsules" [Propranolol Hydrochloride 80mg] instead), and Diazepam 5mg X3 daily, since 1998.
I had undergone a fairly rigorous course of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy for 52 weeks, finishing up in 2007, at which time I was prescribed "Cipralex®" and then Citalopram along with the Propranolol and Diazepam. I honestly found that the Citalopram was of no benefit to me unfortunately, for the anxiety / PTSD, and the side effects were awful for the entire year of taking them; (dry mouth, feeling MORE anxious, nausea, decreased appetite, low sex drive), without getting any helpful therapeutic benefit. In short, after giving the Citalopram a fair chance for a year, I just decided to take myself off them, as I had finished an intensive FIFTY TWO week course of CBT. I withdrew from the Citalopram, "cold turkey" if you like. It was horrible... it felt like there was an electrical storm in my head for a good few days. I've often seen these described as "brain zaps", which describes the sensation quite well.
I had been managing better with my anxiety without the SSRI Citalopram, as the side effects outweighed the benefits (I honestly never found any benefit from them, unfortunately, and a year was a long enough time to decide that they simply were not benefitting me).
Fast forward almost 8 years to present, I have certainly had my ups and downs with anxiety attacks and PTSD, with some very severe attacks in this time. Over 4 months ago, I had the most severe anxiety attack that I have had in 2 and a half years, and very worryingly I had this in my home, with no obvious trigger to me. In short, this has had a catastrophic effect where I have been pretty much developed agoraphobia once again, as the anxiety attacks have really manifested in themselves, where I am constantly feeling anxious, and I am continually getting really debilitating anxiety attacks, which leave me a gibbering wreck, curled up in a ball on the ground. I have lost 30lbs in this last 4 months, which is very worrying also, as I am just a shadow of my former self. I have seen my doctor a lot in this period and have had just about every physical test carried out on me (all physical tests; blood tests, ECG, Xrays, ultrasound etc. came back negative), and have been referred to my local primary care mental health liaison service. Things were quite slow moving as they are very busy, but I finally got to see a Psychiatric doctor last week for a medication review and had been added Mirtazapine / Zispin 15mg to be taken at night for 3 weeks, which on evaluation can be increased to 30mg at 3 weeks and in turn a max dose of 45mg can be prescribed at 6 weeks.
However, I have been having some very undesirable side effects with the Mirtazapine / Zispin even at 15mg this last 2 days especially. The first night, it made me very tired and I had to go to bed within about 20 minutes of taking the first one. I kind of got the sensation of my throat swelling and that horrible taste in my mouth after the first one, but fell asleep quite quickly the first night, slept well (apart from waking in the middle of the night with my tshirt soaked through in sweat) and woke up the next day feeling very groggy. This was no big concern, after what I had been through previously for 4 months with the anxiety attacks. The sedative effects seemed to decrease the last 2 nights, and by the 3rd day taking Mirtazapine / Zispin, I was getting a massive headache after taking it. This last 2 days, as well as the numb mouth and lips with horrible taste in my mouth, unfortunately I have felt "increased" anxiety, and on waking after what little sleep I get and terrible vivid nightmares, as well as the sweats. I was having lots of racing thoughts that was very unusual for me, on waking, while still groggy. For example when my eyes were closed I could see an image like a jumper or whatever, and then it would be distorted by a "bouncy ball" bouncing up and down extremely rapidly.
Another racing thought I had when my eyes were closed, was of a metal spring, which in this intrusive thought, I could see the momentum of the spring coil from one side to the other very rapidly, and all of a sudden in the thought, it seemed to have attached itself to a rib above and below my heart, and the momentum of the coiling was pulsating really fast from one side to the other. This made me very anxious, and as much as I tried to put the thought out of my mind, it seemed to stay, even though I would tell myself it was just a stupid passing thought. I had to open my eyes and sit up in bed and exercise deep abdominal breathing exercises to make it stop. I have never experienced anything quite like this before.
It was very windy outside, so I am not sure if this was the "inspiration" to the next intrusive thought, which was of particles and objects that I visualised when my eyes were closed trying to rest, either being blown across, from right to left, or simply the particles themselves being blown very fast.
Again on waking this morning after very little, broken sleep, and 3 tshirt changes, all sweated right through, I again had terrible anxiety all day with another strange sensation that I had not experienced before today. It was as if someone was constantly shaking a metal tin box full of iron-filings / ball-bearings inside my head, and feeling really uncomfortably over-stimulated, which left me feeling like I drank about 5 cups of strong coffee, causing the anxiety to go through the roof with racing-heart, dry mouth, nauseous, no appetite and all that goes with severe anxiety. That is the effect that the Mirtazapine / Zispin seems to be having on me at the minute, and I am wondering should I continue with it, and if anyone else had experienced any of these symptoms at the early stages? I feel like I have lost too much weight already, and that I can't afford to get much lower than this just now, until I am built up a little bit. Should I take tonights 15mg dose of Mirtazapine / Zispin, or leave it for tonight and wait to hopefully hear back from the Psychiatric doctor who prescribed the Mirtazapine / Zispin, and wait to hear what they say, in regard to me continuing to take the Mirtazapine / Zispin or to stop now? Your suggestions are most welcome, and sorry for such a long-winded introductory post.
Hoping to hear from you all with your experiences / views, and many thanks in advance.