afraid of going through another anxiety " phase " and don't know if I can do it again

[Cassandra]

It's been a few years since my worst anxiety time. I was so happy having worked through months of hell.

The last few weeks I've had some sort of chronic belching issue. I've been to my gp and he is checking for diabetes, coeliac's disease etc. Sent me in for an ecg and that was clear so I know it isn't a heart issue. I've been prescribed omeprazole for the next 4 weeks. I am not concerned about the medical side of this. However, the pain in my chest is nasty, and triggering memories of my worst anxiety times, which in turn is making my symptoms worse.
I am petrified of the downward spiral and don't know if I can fight it a second time. It took everything I had the first time and I've taken care not to let anything get me to that stage again.
How do you stop being afraid of being afraid???

[RosieBelle]

Hi Cassandra :)
I'm sorry to hear what you're going through - I have the whole 'being afraid of being afraid' thing. The best thing to do is to keep yourself distracted from the anxious thoughts - watch tv, read, go online, go out, talk to friends etc...
It's the fear of the anxiety that keeps the anxious thoughts going. So just let the anxious thoughts wash over your head. They are just thoughts(opinions) and you do not need to pay attention to the thoughts. You CAN control your thoughts and if you keep telling yourself that there is nothing to fear with anxiety, then you will be fine :) After all, the anxiety can't harm you, it's just unpleasent. I know it's hard, but keep practicing these techniques and the anxious thoughts will lessen.
When the pain you have in your chest triggers memories for you, stop and turn your thoughts to something else. The thoughts don't control you - you control your thoughts.
You've got through it before, so you will again :)
Hope this helps :hugs:

[Cassandra]

Thank you Rosie belle, I keep rereading your post. It reminds me I'm not the only one.
I seem to be more or less ok during the day, but evenings are hard.
Anyway, thank you for replying. This site helped me a lot the last time. It really helps to talk to people who know what it's like.

[Ange1]

I totally agree with everything Rosiebelle says. You can only feel something you have thought about first so thinking about getting anxious is a self fulfilling prophesy . Understanding that thoughts are just that'thoughts' and in your control and not the other way round is key. Stop those negative thoughts and let then drop. There's a great little book by Richard Carlson called Stop Thinking and start living that I found helpful. When I start to do my usual over thinking following the downward path I tell myself loudly in my head to ' Stop Thinking' this seems to distract my thoughts so I carry on with what I was doing. Some days I was doing it endlessly but I'm really beginning to feel better now. X

[Cassandra]

Hi Ange, thank you for the book recommendation. I downloaded it on kindle and am reading it now.

[RosieBelle]

You're welcome Cassandra :) I'm glad it's helped you and you're definitely not alone as we all understand and get the same on here.
Maybe you can distract yourself lots in the evenings if they're hard at the moment. You can always message me if you ever like to chat :)
Ans Ange...thanks for putting the book recommendation up...I'll check that one out too :)
:hugs:

[Ange1]

Got mine on kindle too :) hope it helps explain a few things at least xx

[Lyn89]

Maybe it won't make sense to you, but here's how I would look at it if this were me right now.

I too have been well for almost (except for posts on here with the occasional blip :p) a year now, and it feels great. Sometimes I do get the odd bad day or few days though, and its all about perspective and what I'm ruminating over. You could actually use the medical issue here to your advantage with your anxiety, strange as it sounds. When you were back in your really bad anxious time, it sounds like you had horrible things like chest pain from it, which is scary when you think that anxiety can cause such horrible physical symptoms. Yet here you are now, and the only thing that can cause those symptoms again is something medical and completely unrel ated because you are so strong in your mind now that anxiety doesn't and cant cause that effect on you anymore. Be kind to yourself-- focus on getting better from whatever this physical thing is and know that that's all you're battling right now. It's not anxiety rearing its ugly head again, its this other thing. All its doing is reminding you of something unpleasant, but you are much stronger than a memory now.

[Cassandra]

Thank you Lynn, that's a very good point.
Ange, that book is great, thanks again. It's aimed at depression more than anxiety, but the points he makes about your thoughts are so relevant to anxiety.
And Rosie belle, thank you for the offer, I may just take you up on that.

[MyNameIsTerry]

Well, we know that the Amygdala (right side) looks for emotional response to make associations between our thoughts, feelings, sensations, memories, etc. This is how anxiety disorders start but it requires a period of reinforcement to 'set'. At this point, it has learnt to start sending certain forms of data to your prefrontal cortex.

However, and this has been backed up by accepted studies, the prefrontal cortex remains the decision maker. So, if you start to panic what you actually do it tell the subconscious that it has sent a 'valid' set of data to it, not correct, just valid. This is why its important not to react and why techniques such as floating, Mindfulness, acceptance, etc all work if you learn them.

Its a classic one in OCD's intrusive thoughts that if you react with stron emotion, it reinforces the subconscious' view that it is valid. By not reacting, over time, it stops generating the data. Eventually, these old neural pathways get broken up and destroyed.

Thats why CBT works based on using your cognitive mind to change how you think about panic & anxiety and over time, the subconscious changes. However, in CBT you learn that its not only thoughts that trigger this but feelings, emotions or sensations.

Thats from own reading on various psychology websites and reading research.

So, the way I see it is that you have the ability now to not react and thus subdue it but if you react with the old responses of anxiety, it could grow.

[RosieBelle]

You're welcome Cassandra, you can always message me :)
^Love what you've said Terry! I will keep looking at your message to help me :)

[Cassandra]

Thank you Terry, and apologies for the delay replying.
Slowly starting feel a bit more like myself again.

The issue that was triggering my anxiety has been (mostly ) dealt with. Without the chest pain I am not as anxious as I was earlier this week.

I am still having trouble eating as seem to be having some kind of reaction to omeprazole. I have now been prescribed something similar which hopefully will solve this.

In the mean time, to keep myself from panicking, I've been listening to a lot of guided meditations on Spotify. I find they really help me relax.
That, along with the great book Ange recommended are keeping me sane.

[MyNameIsTerry]

Thats OK Cassandra, is it some sort of GERD/acid type issue with him trying you on omeprazole?

I used to like guided visualisations as the pleasant music is helpful but meditation is a good one and if you try Mindfulness, you will be starting with something that has clinical backing as well.

Professor Mark Williams books on MBCT get great reviews and I can say the one I had read is really good. It explains about DOING & BEING modes, gives exercises & guided meditations to work with the chapters across an 8 week programme. It has backing by NICE for its results in treating recurrent depression and is based on MBSR by Jon Kabat-Zinn which has a load of clinical evidence of its effectiveness for mental health disorders as well as pain & symptom control in actualy physical illnesses e.g. asthma, cancer, etc.