Diazepam withdrawal from sporatic use?

[scott jenkins]

Hello, I have been diagnosed with severe generalised anxiety disorder, agoraphobia, depression etc.
I am very scared as i write this as i don't think I am going to survive much longer.
I was taking 30 ml citalopram and taking 5 ml diazepam when required.
I managed to ween myself down to 2.5 ml of citalopram over a period of 6 months and then I started to stop taking the diazepam.
I had stopped taking the diazepam for almost 13 days, when all of a sudden, just before tea time 2 weeks ago I had the mother of all panic attacks. The strange thing was, unlike a normal panic attack ( hyperventilating, weak limbs, convinced i was going to die etc) i had this unusual sensation in my spine, as if all the nerves were excited and it was getting more and more intense. I started shaking uncontrollably. My girlfriend phoned for an ambulance and in the meantime i took 10 ml of diazepam with no effect.
I went to the hospital, they tested my blood pressure, blood glucose and heart but all was fine.
I came home a few hours later, but i was still feeling unwell so i too another 5 ml of diazepam.
I didn't sleep much that night and i went to see the doctor the following morning. She suggested that i start taking escatalopram.
I must say the escatalopram has definitely had an effect on my mood in a positive way but the anxiety hasnt let up for nearly 2 weeks now.
Up until last Saturday i had taken a total of 55 ml of diazepam in a 10 day period. I stopped taking the diazepam for 3 days and then yesterday at around 5pm the mother of all panic attacks returned. I had this horrible exitement along my spine, i was shaking, I thought i was going mental and that i was going to have seizure or something, it was really awful.
It got so bad that i ended up taking 15 ml of diazepam again, it took ages to work but i was finally calm enough to go to sleep.
I woke up in a panic several times before i dropped off but i finally fell asleep.
Ive woken up this morning, and i still feel quite weak and very scared that something else is wrong with me.
My question is, could the sporatic use of diazepam over thr last 5 years be causing these episodes? Especialy the sensations in my spine which are more frightening than the anxiety itself. Do you think that the 2 week abstinence from the diazepam was a shock to my system?
I forgot to mention that when i was in hospital the nurse mentioned that i went kind of grey and that i was possibly in shock.
Thanks for listening, please help me.

[nicola1980]

How often were you taking the Diazepam? Daily? If you were taking it daily or quite often throughout the week then you def could be suffering some withdrawal from it, Diazepam should be cut down very slowly but you could also have been suffering some withdrawal from the citalopram.

[scott jenkins]

Initialy, i was taking diazepam to prevent a panic attack or to ease one when it manifested.
But i think ive come to rely on them more often.
So to answer your question, i was taking them quite often throughout the week but not every day. But i was taking higher doses in the last year, probably more often than i should have.
Thank you so much for your reply, i thought i was close to having a fit or sezure last night. i am so scared

[nicola1980]

It certainly does sound like it could be Diazepam withdrawal then, you have to reduce Diazepam very slowly as it can cause seizures, alot of people withdraw by a quarter of a tablet at a time to help reduce withdrawal effects, Diazepam has a very long half like upto 200 hours so it sounds very much like you were in withdrawal. Is it your Gp who prescribes it to you? If so I would recommend you go and see them and get a safe taper plan X

---------- Post added at 15:14 ---------- Previous post was at 15:12 ----------

Also your body builds up a tolerance to Diazepam so eventually you'll need more and more for it to take effect hence why you've been having to take higher doses.

[scott jenkins]

Thank you so much for your reply. It was my doctor who prescribed them for me but i also started to buy them in the last year or so as i would get through my prescription earlier and earlier as each month would pass.

[nicola1980]

How many mg's on average have you been using a week? X

[scott jenkins]

Hi, sorry its late. Ive been taking on average around 30-40 ml per week. But ive tried to stop cold turkey twice now, the first time i lasted almost 12 days and i started shaking. The second time i lasted 3 days.
Today ive felt so bad ive just taken 40 ml in total. I think the last 10 ml i just took has started to work.
I am so scared, i have four beautiful children and i dont want them to be without their father. I want to see them grow up

---------- Post added at 21:14 ---------- Previous post was at 21:08 ----------

Its these feelings in my spine i cant stop worrying about, its like a full blown panic attack but im also anxious in my back if ghat makes sense. It feels as if its going to start convulsing or something, ive suffered with anxiety all my life and have never experienced anything like this.
Perhaps i need to stabilise the amount of diazepam in my system and try to keep it at a constant level, rather than letting it deplete and go through hell every couple of weeks.

[nicola1980]

Hi that's quite alot of Diazepam to be taking on a weekly basis so yes your body will def go into withdrawal and the reason it started 12 days after your cold turkey was because it has such a long half life. You really need to be careful with Diazepam reduction as it can cause awful severe withdrawal which I imagine that's what your experiencing. I really think you need to see your Gp and explain all this to them so they can come up with a safe taper plan. You will need to take the same dose of Diazepam daily to do this no more and no less and then when your stable you can reduce by just 1mg at a time then went to stabilise again then reduce again. You say you've been buying Diazepam aswell well you need to tell your Gp this too so they know exactly how to treat you. I'm not sure where you've been buying it from but your probably aware this isn't safe as you don't really know what it exactly is. Diazepam withdraw from high doses like you've been taking can be very dangerous and cause seizures, i don't want to scare you but you really need to get some help with this. X

---------- Post added at 22:36 ---------- Previous post was at 22:19 ----------

The fact you've taken 40mg just today is concerning, for your sake and your children's you need to go and see your Gp and be honest about buying in extra Diazepam and your usage of it they will then advice you of a safe taper plan. I used to take 10mg a day and I reduced this by 1mg at a time every couple of weeks sometimes it took me a month to stabilise, i then when I got down to 4mg I used to cut a 2mg tablet in half and then quarters and then drop a quarter at a time to reduce withdrawal as the lower you get the harder the withdrawal comes. Anxiety is truly awful I know but taking that amount of Diazepam in one day is unsafe so for the sake of your family get some professional help to get your usage lower, hope this helps X

[scott jenkins]

I just wanted to thank you nicola1980. Your posts may have saved my life.
Just been to doctors. it was definitely diazepam withdrawal, ive been put on a stable dose of 20ml per day until I stabalise the amount in my blood. Then i'm going to slowly taper after a few months until im better again.
If you take this drug, dont ever try to come off it cold turkey as it can cause severe withdrawal including rebound anxiety, seizures and sometimes even death.
Im feeling better already. Thank you so much!

[nicola1980]

I'm so pleased you've been to see your doctor and you've got a proper taper plan, i hope all goes well for you X

[keggsy]

A friend of mine was taking 10to15mg a day for several weeks and his Gp told him to just stop taking it.
What planet was he on!

This site is so useful!

[scott jenkins]

I think some doctors need to educate themselves. I seemed to know more than my doctor and I am an idiot lol!

[nicola1980]

Unfortunately Gps aren't clued up on these meds, my physc even thought I could drop by 1mg at a time which was too much for me towards the end X

[scott jenkins]

May i ask? did you complete the withdrawal process and if so was it difficult and do you feel better now?

[nicola1980]

Yes I did withdraw and it wasn't too bad, there were days when I had the odd slip up especially so when I got down to just 3mg a day as that's the hardest part, the lower you get the harder it is so the odd day I succumbed and took an extra 1 or 2mg as I couldn't bare the anxiety and shakes but I soon got on track again. Unfortunately I've had a major setback since Christmas so I have been using the Diazepam again but I make sure I never take more than 3mg a day, i cut the 2mg tablets in half and take it like that when and if I need them. Anxiety and panic is such a horrible feeling you sometimes need some respite. You've done exactly the right thing seeing your Gp and getting help, you should be proud of yourself it's a big step for you. Just take one day at a time and you'll get there X

[MyNameIsTerry]

Glad you are feeling better Scott. Its amazing how much you can learn on a peer support website like this, a lot of which doctors don't know or understand.

Its incredible how GP's tend to work without researching their actions. You get an appointment and they treat you there and then unless they need tests first and they don't seem to refer to anybody for advice at all. In the case of antidepressant medication there is a service that doctors are advised to call to discuss anything tricky so they have the support but they just don't seem to bother using it and once you are out of the surgery its all over and they don't care until next time you are down there. Its just treating people as numbers really.

The odd thing is, if you contacted a private company or the council and had this type of experience, you would expect them to go and find out what to do & why and wouldn't accept any other answer. So, the answer keggsy's mate had wouldn't be tolerated and would be seen on the same level as any call centre agent who blags to get you off the phone!

[scott jenkins]

So, i just started to take my 20ml diazepam (10 ml in morning, 10 in night) Im still feeling a little bit anxious, i think im still in a bit of shock from the whole ordeal to be honest. What im wondering now is that is 20 ml a day overkill. I mean, am i going to be causing a bigger addiction this way.
Perhaps I should stick to 10ml a day just in case, or should i just listen to doctor?
Thank you to everyone for your kind support

[nicola1980]

Listen to your Gp hun, it sounds about right to me considering the amount you have been taking, i think if you take just 10mg your going to still suffer withdrawal, stick with your prescribed 20mg and wait until your stable before even thinking of reducing, my Gp once told me he has patients on high doses of Diazepam so in my opinion 20mg isn't that high X

[MyNameIsTerry]

Is 20ml an increase Scott? If 10ml was the equivalent of what you were originally on then I would expect it to be the dose set by your GP but unless perhaps Nicola or someone else can advise better, it might be worth querying with your GP or asking a pharmacist.

What reason did your GP give for an increased dosage?

[scott jenkins]

Because I was taking them sporatically and I was also buying them from people, I have no idea what my average does was. I was supposed to be taking 5ml when required at a total of 10 tablets per month, but obviously I was taking more than that. How much more exactly, I dont know but I was not taking them every day.

---------- Post added at 19:49 ---------- Previous post was at 19:45 ----------

Perhaps 30 - 40 ml per week sometimes higher, sometimes lower at a guess but id been doing it for years

[nicola1980]

I think you need to stick with 20mg a day like your Gp has said as even tho you've not used it everyday, you've been using it every week for a number of years. Like I've said Diazepam has a really long half life so stays in your body for a good week or more. You need to stabilise on a dose and stick with that dose then gradually reduce when you feel stable to do so, you certainly don't want a repeat of the withdrawal you've experienced this week X

[MyNameIsTerry]

I think you need to stick with 20mg a day like your Gp has said as even tho you've not used it everyday, you've been using it every week for a number of years. Like I've said Diazepam has a really long half life so stays in your body for a good week or more. You need to stabilise on a dose and stick with that dose then gradually reduce when you feel stable to do so, you certainly don't want a repeat of the withdrawal you've experienced this week X

Hi Nicola,

Is it possible that his GP has set a new steady level that is higher? I'm just wondering because it looks like his GP has told him to take around 3 times more per week than he would normal and wouldn't this just make the withdrawal even harder? It just seems strange to go so high over a week but is it because a daily level needs to be consistent in order to prevent constant withdrawal issues spiking the underlying anxiety condition?

[nicola1980]

Hi terry, i think his Gp has done it to get the Diazepam content consistent in his body as the other day he took 40mg in just one day, the problem with Diazepam withdrawal is if your levels aren't consistent if you've been taking it for a few years then you will just keep going into withdrawal and as Scott has been doing taking more and more of the drug to counteract the withdrawal. He needs to stabilise on a dose so he can start a safe taper plan, i think anyway! X

[MyNameIsTerry]

Thanks for replying Nicola. I guess he just needs to keep an eye on how he feels now and stay in touch with his GP.

[scott jenkins]

Here's a quick update. Ive been on a stable dose of diazepam for about a week and im also on escatalopram 5ml which ive been on for nearly 3 weeks.
I must say i feel better, not cured but better as in i dont think im dying 24/7 anymore. I think i was almost in a state of psychosis a week back. I still feel scared to go outside but thats part of my agoraphobia and GAD. Ive also stopped thinking about suicide.
Thanks for everyones support. I dont know what i would have done without this site.
Best wishes to everyone.
Scott

[MyNameIsTerry]

Thats good to hear Scott.

You want to stay on here, there is a lot of help available from others. Getting support when tapering is also going to be helpful to you so you know what to expect and get support, even if its people being positive for you.

[Logan_Five]

I've been back on the diazepam after my anxiety completely overwhelmed me over the weekend (leading to suicidal thoughts) It has helped. :) Sunday I had 16mg in total, 10mg on Monday, 2mg yesterday and another 2mg this morning - more just to take the edge off. I certainly don't want to be popping them like smarties.

I've also had a couple of night's taking 10mg Temazepam to help me sleep. Going to try without tonight, so see how I get on. :)

[Logan_Five]

I had 4 days with no anxiety, but it returned yesterday and am not sure as to why?! Had 7mg diazepam yesterday and so far 4mg today. Have been prescribed 3x2mg per day, though have I have some 5mgs spare in case it gets really bad. I don't want to be on these long term, but the counsellor has said not to worry about that now - it's about getting stable and well.

Not sure as to why the anxiety disappeared for those 4 days, although I didn't feel the need to take any meds - perhaps I still should have done?

I'm also a big fella (6'8 - 15st), so I'm not sure how much good 6mg a day will do? Am back at the GP's on Thursday, so I guess I can discuss things further with her then.

[SarahH]

Are you on any other meds? Short term use of diazepam is fine to get you stabilised but long term maybe you should be asking about other meds. The doses you are taking are not excessively high. But obviously the more you use it the more your body will get used to it and then you will need larger doses this in when the problems start.

Stay positive

sarah

[Logan_Five]

Sarah - am currently on 30mg Citalopram- has been stepped up from 20mg for a week, and I'll probs go back up to 40mg by the end of the week (which was what I was on before I came off, Citalopram) Am aware that the anxiety could be side-effects as I'm only 5 weeks back in- I hope it's just that, and that these feelings will pass once the Citalopram kicks in.

What long term alternatives are there to diazepam which could work alongside the Citalopram?

[SarahH]

Pregabalin works for me alongside Citalopram....you could ask about that:)

Sarah

[nedohare]

Don’t know if any of you’d are still on this thread but was just wondering how things have turned out for yous,Scott and nicola