I am scared to take the next step

[Humly]

I really dont want to go to the docs about my anxiety.

I have suffered with this for at least 20 years. It hasnt been constant and I have been really good for long periods of time but every now and then something happens and I just dont deal with things very well at all. I know I must have a bit of anxiety there under the surface all the time and sometimes it over flows and takes me over completely. It can be a physical symptom or a situation in life which, had it been happening to another person, they would just get on with things and kind of shrug it off. But with me, I become fixated on it. It occupies my every waking thought and I know this is not normal and I need to change. You wouldnt believe some of the things I have worried about over the years!

I know I need to do something about this. What happens is I usually ride it out, become depressed and cry a lot and then things slowly improve for a while until the next situation and off I go again.

I know I should probably go to the docs about this but I just feel so stupid and ashamed. I would go in and start crying and not be able to talk about my issues. Then I end up with meds which I am scared to take in case they make me feel worse. Are there any meds out there with minimal side effects?

The other alternative is counselling, which our local nhs has a self referral service for, but again I am scared to do this. I dont know what it would involve. Just scared thats all.

I dont know what I am trying to say but thanks for reading. I just think that I should be able to deal with this on my own. Any comments greatly appreciated.

[Carnation]

Humly, there's no need to be scared. :hugs:

I don't take Meds and I have been to the GP lots of times and I see a Therapist regularly.
I think you have done extremely well to cope with this on your own, but out of the two, I would definitely consider a Therapist to support you. You are in control here and sometimes you just need a little comfort and advice to help you along the way. I picked my own Therapist by going online and it works for me. :)

[Ange1]

I agree with Carnation a therapist made all the difference to me. Just taking the step to go helped as it makes you feel like you are starting to take back control. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain . Big hugs :hugs: x

[hanshan]

All medications have side effects for some people. Often the side effects are only temporary.

The two medications I take for anxiety, mirtazapine and pregabalin, are among those with the lowest side effects, and are worth a try. They are reasonably fast acting, so you should know in two weeks or so if they are working for you.

Whichever path you take, good luck.

[MyNameIsTerry]

There is no weakness or shame in asking for help. We wouldn't even entertain not asking for help if we broke a bone so what is the difference? Think of it that way, they are their to help you with your health.

Sometimes its just too hard on your own and these are complex disorders that we won't understand and education is an important step to conquer and prevent later relapse. You can then use this to manage future periods, most probably like you are by being on NMP.

If you cry in front of your GP, it doesn't matter as he/she is used to dealing with difficult situations and they will just be concerned for your health. They will want to help you. I've done my tears at the worst stages, it was unbearable back then...but I'm much better than I was as so can you be if you accept the help.

You don't have to take antidepressants and NICE guiddelines preefer the use of therapy prior to medication anyway, its just that meds are cheap but therapy isn't and we have a shortage of therapists out there.

Is it counselling or therapy? There are information sites about what is expected at many of these services or types of therapy and I would be happy to find you some information about them.

At my local service it was all CBT based as it was IAPT. I had a referral off my GP and was assessed face-to-face by a lovely lady. She then gave me 5 telephone sessions of guided self help before I moved onto the high intensity CBT face-to-face therapy for 12-15 sessions which they said I would need. This was with a more experienced therapist and she was really nice, always asked if I was comfortable discussing something and what did I want to use the meeting to address.

Therapists & counsellors have to be non judgemental and they have heard so many things in their work that they will not be surprised by the things people say and even if they were unsure about a situation, they are supervised by a more experienced senior therapist/counsellor who will know what to do.

I was very anxious about going to mine but I'm very glad I did. Even if the therapy doesn't bring recovery, you learn a lot and gain more confidence in talking about all this stuff. I was as open about all this as I am on here or at the charity walk-ins I used to go to and thats because of my experiences in therapy.

[Humly]

Thanks for your comments. I'm still thinking about what to do.

Terry, I posted something in the therapy section about the local Talking changes in County Durham which you kindly replied to. I recognise the patterns of my "thinking" and just wish I could stop over reacting to everything and be a bit more relaxed. In the grand scheme of things I am worrying over not very much and I know this but cant stop myself.

I am not convinced that counselling would help me but I really must try and give it a go but not sure that I am a good candidate for success. That sounds really negative I know.

Confused ....

[susiet04]

Humly, I am the exact same as you, I can go for years and be fine and then something just sets it off and I cannot eat, sleep or do anything and my mind constantly races of what ifs! I did not want to go to the docs either but I had to give in as it was taken over my life when I was bad. I went for cbt and I was very optimistic about it but it really really helped and it has helped me over the years to cope. Again I am in the situation when I am bad again so I am going back for more therapy starting necxt week and I would really recommend it. I know what you are saying about the thoughts you have as mine have been blown way out of proportion sometimes xx