Why Now Optical Migraines

[Mart0310]

Hi Guys, new to the forum and just cant believe where Im finding myself right now :(

Having lived with Anxiety for almost 10 years, I took the decision to put myself through counselling (privately). Eventually I came out the other side two years ago, virtually anxiety free and feeling proud of myself. For the first time in a very long time I felt able to function 100%, I felt able to work! once again I was enjoying social situations, I was free!

Thats until mid February, when I was busy working at my desk and had a visual disturbance, I literally couldnt see my screen, just as if Id been dazzled by the sun. It passed, I wasnt overly stressed about it, I put it down to the sunshine coming through the window and bouncing off my screen.

Two days later it happened again - in the dark!, no explanation for this one and then again the following day!

I saw an out of hours GP who diagnosed Optical Migraine, I saw my own GP who agreed and said they would stop as soon as the trigger revealed/settled. I had a thorough check up with the optician (incuding computer imaging and field vision) revealed no problems with my eyes. Optician has a couple of ideas of what it might be - sun burning an image on my eye which took a while to go etc. I went two weeks without an attack, starting to feel confident and then bang it hit me again!

Back to the GP, who wants to run some blood test, particularly thyroid and B12/Folate (Anemia). Both can cause the problem and Anemia seems logical given my poor diet, in fact I had suspected this back in January by how tired I was.

In the meantime, Ive spent the last few weeks constantly worrying, waiting for it to happen again, scared to drive, scared to be alone. I just cant shift it from my thoughts. Yesterday, I had to go to have the bloods taken, I struggled to keep the panic under control. and this morning my panic topped out, I dont remember ever experiencing panic that high in the past, although its been a while so maybe I did.

Im petrefied something I eat or do will trigger an attack, Im scared of going out in bright sun, what I eat, Im scared of wearing my sunglasses, using the pc etc all of which could potentially be a trigger, ironically sunglasses and the computer were what used to get me through high anxiety, so at the same time Ive lost my security blanket.

My head is just in a spin, I feel like Im on this horrible fairground ride and Im waiting for it to stop! So sorry for the long post, its the first time Ive got my feelings down in writing for a very long time.

Thanks for listening :weep:

[Mrsmitchell1984]

I had these back in 2012 and was too diagnosed with ocular migraines. I had them 3 times and thankfully they went. How long do they last for you?

I have not had one now for nearly 3 years, but remember the distress. I was convinced I had a brain tumour but had all the tests and was fine.

I later discovered, through my own research that you could have panic attacks in your eyes. I think Claire Weekes in her book touches on this too.

I also said to myself that I will cope with them no matter what. I think once you know nothing is wrong- it is easier to cope with them and just see them as an adrenaline surge- if that is what they are for you.

I just wanted to give you a bit of hope that someone else has these and they have gone.

Best wishes,

Sally

[Mart0310]

Sally thanks for your reply, Hearing that you only had 3 and they went away is more reassuring than anything Ive read so far! The thought that these might go on forever was my worst fear.

Mine last only around 15 mins. I think you may have a point about panic related, Ive noticed when Im reading at the moment (obviously Im constantly checking!) that the text can begin to blur/break up etc, and breathing through it settles it back down.

The first time it happened I was under pressure typing up a report and I vaguely remember feeling a little bit stressed, I had also missed lunch.

Thanks so much for your reply, for the first time in weeks Im feeling a little bit relieved! X

[Ange1]

i also had this about 10 years ago. I was referred to a specialist who diagnosed Ocular migraine. By the time I saw the specialist it was much less anyway and went altogether shortly after. Despite plenty of stress it hasn't come back since . I agree it is linked to stress although I wasn't suffering full blown anxiety attacks at the time x

[Mart0310]

Thanks Ange, another reassuring experience, wish I would have came here when it started night. Funny you say you weren't experiencing full blown anxiety at the time. I wasn't either, my anxiety was almost zilch, in comparison to the ten years before it. I was under a bit of pressure but no obvious anxiety symptom not even the early warnings.

Thanks again for your reassuring message X

[JITTERBUG1]

I had this happen to me in 2007. I had it happen 4 times in a 2 week period. Rushed to the doctor. Saw an eye specialist. They both agreed that it was optical migraines. They scared me to death. The good news is I have only had it happen two other times. Once in 2010 and once in 2014. I just wanted you to know that it happens to others and even though they are scary they are short lived. Don' t panic like I did. I barely left the house for 6 months. Take care! Lots of love, Tiffany

[Mrsmitchell1984]

The fact that they only last 15 mins makes me convicted they are panic attacks in your eyes. Mine only lasted 15-30 mins.

Keep us posted with how you get on.

Best wishes,

Sally

[Mart0310]

Yeah I think you are right, just wish it wouldnt have taken so long for me to get to that conclusion. My anxiety is all over the place, after two years without Im finding that really hard to accept

[Oosh]

I had these last year. Where you see circular heat wave like things ?
I'm prone to developing weird food fads. I'd started eating stacks of chocolate. That's when they developed. Hand in hand with a bit of moderate stress probably. I quit chocolate and they were gone within a couple of weeks. Not had them since.

[Mart0310]

Hi Oosh,

I know for certain that on at least two of the days I had eaten belgian chocolate. Very much the heatwave thing, the last one (a week ago) was more like sunlight shimmering on water.

Funny thing is my anxiety has shifted from worry about vision to worries about anxiety. Id forgotten what a frustrating game this is!

---------- Post added at 13:49 ---------- Previous post was at 11:10 ----------

Out of interest, those of you who have experienced this and its then gone away. Were your last few attacks more mild than the earlier ones. Over the last week, Ive what I thought might have been two very minor 'glimmers' so mild I cant be sure whether it was one or just me thinking it might be

[Mrsmitchell1984]

They got worse for me- but this was before I was diagnosed with ocular migraines. So I guess the panics got worse. I started taking fluoxetine and they were gone.

How did you get over your anxiety? Xx

[Mart0310]

Well medication was a NoNo for me, by the time I realised it was out of control I was already at the stage where I found medication or the idea of medication too anxiety provoking - there were days when I wished I could have swallowed a pill

In the end, I found a brilliant counsellor on a private basis, she used a combination of therapies including CBT with a perfect balance. First we worked on bringing the anxiety levels down through task based activity, having shut myself away from the world for quite some time, this initially gave quite an anxiety rise, ironically it soon became a grounding experience!

As my anxiety begun to fall, the real work began 'talking it through' taking the sting out of anxiety and the thought processes I had learned along the way. Bit by bit I changed, until one day I realised I couldnt remember the last time I had woken thinking 'how am I feeling'

Finally, we looked at how I got anxious in the frst place - work related. This was important to make sure I didnt go back down that road again.

Finishing counselling was an amazing feeling, it felt literally like I had lifted the anchor and set sail again!

When the eye thing flared up, I tried to book in to see her again, as bad as timing gets, she happened to be away on holiday until April, which I think possibly is why my anxiety has got out of hand. My first decision was to go back to counselling thus telling myself I couldnt cope alone, and then I found the security blanket wasnt actually there when I reached for it. I have booked in to see her in April, Im counting down the weeks now! X

[Mrsmitchell1984]

Your counsellor sounds great. Where are you based in the UK?

Did she help you with depression too?

How long do you have to wait for your appointment?

Xx

[Mart0310]

She really was fantastic, in the early days I could barely make it through a 30 min session, She used to watch my body language and would know exactly when to change the subject, within a few weeks I was going to her alone, breezing through an hour session and actually looking forward to the next!

I count myself very lucky that I have never suffered with depression, I absolutely take my hat off to anyone who suffers with the combination.

I'm Bristol based, when I booked to see her the first time, it was literally the next week, that's the benefit of private I guess - also unlike the NHS you aren't limited to 6 or 12 sessions maximum which takes the pressure off. My next app is middle of April, it really can't come quick enough! X

[Mart0310]

Blood results back today, all normal .. Im actually shocked by this!

[Ange1]

My attacks definitely got less in intensity and frequency towards the end. I think by the time I got to see the specialist they were just little glimmers. X

[Mrsmitchell1984]

That is good. Did you have a brain scan too?

Xx

[Mart0310]

Thanks Ange1, thats good to know, Im hoping thats whats happeing here to! X

Im booked in for a CT next month, Ive had a field vision test with the optician, which was perfect. Apparenly any issue with the brain would show here, doesnt stop me dreading the scan though!! X

[Mart0310]

Decision made - back to counselling, hopefully just a few sessions to put my anx thinking around these migraines to bed. Appointment booked for Thursday :)

[Mrsmitchell1984]

Great stuff. Just out of interest (as I am battling anxiety at present) what techniques did your therapist use to help?

I dreaded the ct scan- but (maybe I am weird) I actually enjoyed the experience in the end. It is just to put your mind at rest xx

---------- Post added at 06:57 ---------- Previous post was at 06:56 ----------

How did you take the sting out get anxiety?

Xx

[Mart0310]

My Counsellor used a comibination of CBT and talking. For me, there were two things, well actually three

1) Learning not to overthink anxiety, looking for answers that just arent there - I had this overwhelming urge to 'fix' my anxiety, and by nature I was looking for a physical cause, the internet is full of them. Counselling taught me that, setting aside the exception to rule, Anxiety is a self taught reaction, and whilst pretty disabling at times it wasnt a disability in the true sense - The only thing stopping me was my thinking! Changing this made a lot of difference - Now I believed I could beat this!

2) Then come the undoing of 10 years of 'wonky' thinking. This challenged everything I thought I knew - thoughts that made me feel safe despite actually causing anxiety. A lot of these thoughts had become 'automatic over the years' having a counsellor really help to start identifying those, after a while it became easier to challenge my thinking, the thoughts that were anxious or anxiety prevoking became obvious - soon I learned to challnge my self in situations for example 'Im in a queue, I feel trapped, Im going to panic, everyone will know' - became Im in a queue, I can leave at anytime, nobody will notice but even if they do what does it matter?'

3) Taking the power/sting out of anxiety - By challenging the thought you take back the power, Its a bit like the school bully - only scary whilst you believe it. Asking myself worst case scenario really helped.

Gradual exposure to situations is self assuring, and this can be as gradual as you need - Driving was a real issue for me, I started with just going out to the car starting it up and sitting there for a few minutes, that moved to very short drives (the end of the road and back) and then around the block. I worried that the small steps would last forever, they didnt - confidence came and steps suddenly became leaps, the next thing I knew anxiety didnt come hand in hand with driving anymore. Confidence in one area also spread to others 'confidence breads confidence'

Does that help at all ?

The results of the scan will be reassuring, the though of waiting for those results is really the bit Im worried about :scared15:

---------- Post added at 11:19 ---------- Previous post was at 07:46 ----------

And today things are looking a little more positive.

My GP called - the normal blood results that they gave me earlier in week were not complete. My Vitamin D results were not in. They are now, and Im deficient - Amongst other things Vitamin D diffiency causes Migraine and Visual disturbances. Im hoping this is the explanation, it certainly seems the logical route :yahoo:

[helloworld]

Hi mart. Sounds like you are experiencing classical migraine with aura. I have had these for many years, way longer than I have had serious anxiety issues for. I suggest you keep a food diary... There are several classical triggers, including aged meats and cheeses, chocolate and citrus fruits all of which are high in tyramine. These certainly set mine off, but they also happen when I'm stressed.... So it's certainly not straightforward. I've experienced these things hundreds of times and am now so used to them they don't bother me - can just be problematic when driving or reading etc... I know it's easy to say but I would try not to worry about these. Just ride them out when they start and they will be gone in 20 mins or so... Happy to chat further if helpful!

[feelthelove]

I have been getting these for 25 years sometimes 5 or more a year, just had one today on my way to physio, i have never heard them called eye panic attacks , well i haven't had a break from them in 25 years but i want them to stop as they freak me out and ruin my life . Are optical migraines also called migraine aura then or is there a difference. Also i haven't found a trigger yet and i have restricte my diet to almost eating nothing for 8 years and still got them this crap has caused me a lifetime of fear and anxiety i sometimes wish i was dead .