Worry

[zx123]

Hi,
I find that I worry a lot and that my mind tends to go from worrying about one thing to worrying about something else. Sometimes when somebody mentions something that I hadn't even been thinking about before I start to worry about that. I have been like this for quite a long time and it can be quite tiring when I am worried about something and it is always on my mind. I am worrying about something at the moment and I find that my mind just keeps focusing on it all the time and I spend all my time thinking about it. I would like to be able to stop worrying, not feel anxious and just live in the moment. It is not all the time and there have been times when I have not been worried but at when I am worrying I find it hard to think about anything else.

[Oosh]

It can be a habit to worry. Worrying is looking for a certain thing in each subject. Danger, what could go wrong, what to be afraid of. And if you are in the habit of looking for those specific things in each subject that's all you'll see and find.
You have to become aware of that and consciously make the effort to look for something different in subjects.
How can you solve it !
How can you navigate through it expertly illustrating your ability and ever increasing confidence to yourself ?
How can you use it to benefit you ?
What is there to enjoy etc etc

Saw a horizon docu once on being neurotic. Had the guy use a computer programme asking him to select the smiling friendly face amongst the angry faces on each page. They concluded its about what you are in the habit of looking for. Your mood will follow.

I used to be very cynical about people. I started looking for what I liked in people, looking for the friend in people etc and I started liking people again.

Practice looking for different things.

[Davit]

With CBT one of the things you do is change negative to positive but another thing is change thoughts to similar but less negative. Mostly with the words you use but also with things you do. Take worry, concern sounds the same but really isn't. With worry you either have no answer or too many and can't choose. With concern you take one thought and give it one answer even if it might be wrong and move on. No going back unless the answer proves wrong and at that you only give it another answer once and move on. If you can't stop worrying stick to the one answer every time the worry comes up.

---------- Post added at 14:01 ---------- Previous post was at 13:56 ----------

Oosh
What you are in the habit of your mind will follow. If you look at page three of my introduction "free at last" you will see a description of the thought triangle. This is an expansion of what you just said.

[stupidbrain!]

Hi ZX123,

I'm assuming that you've not yet undergone any CBT ? One of my main problems is constant worry about different things. We all have worries that enter our minds at random intervals but it's how we action upon them that makes all the difference.

Rumination is a part of everyones day, but prolonged periods is usually unhelpful and you need to learn tools to combat it.

The next time you find yourself worrying about a particular thing, ask yourself, "Can I do anything to change the outcome ?" If you cannot, you must let it go. I appreciate that sounds simple yet impossible for you, however I learned some great methods at my CBT sessions to do just that. Imagine the thought as a train moving from one end of your mind to the other, we aren't getting on this train, we're just letting it pass. As we cannot do anything to change this particular worry, we must let it go. The same thought is likely to come round again, maybe in 1 hour, maybe the next day/week, we have to once again let it drift out of our mind.

A therapist may suggest to have a worry slot. This is where you allocate maybe 20-30 mins at a set time each day, purely to sit and allow our worries enter our minds. Any thoughts that we can do nothing to change the particular situation must be allowed to drift on. Any thoughts that are actual problems we can do something about need to have a plan of action made. What can you do to resolve this problem and how ? When can this be achieved realistically ?

I could go on for hours about the techniques that I have learned and whilst I am still having trouble with GAD, I can manage much better than before the therapy. After talks with my doctor (who started me on meds), he gave me the contact details of my local Primary Care facility. It may well be different in your area, however I was able to self-enroll in a CBT programme where I had 16 sessions, at least 1 week apart from each other.

These sessions are with a High Intensity Therapist and they will customise the sessions to your needs. I'd like to think that the same treatment I had is also available in all areas however this may be wishful thinking !

It's getting late and I must go to bed however feel free if you'd like to ask something and I'll reply ASAP.

Take care,

Steve