Feeling hopeless

[colinmckee2]

Since my bad trip 2 and a half months ago, I've been plagued with fears over my health. Heart concerns, brain tumours, stroke, carbon monoxide poisoning - you name it. I was getting better but now
I've relapsed. I am feeling extremely derailed from society, the world is constantly spinning and I feel like I'm going to pass out. This is accompanied by jolting of the brain when trying to sleep as well as a free falling sensation. I've stopped doing the things I love sport and football as I'm petrified of cardiac arrest as a result of the drugs I took, I haven't nor ever will take anything again as a result. However I'm just petrified of everything. My arms go numb and I link it to a stroke, a chest pain and it's a heart attack, dizziness and it's Cardiac arrest. I'm
Never out of the emergency room and I cannot take medication as the side effects initially make me worse and I cannot Afford to get any worse in case bad thoughts enter my head. Is there any hope out there? What do
I do? I'm only 20 years old. All my tests came back normal but was low in white blood cells I don't know what that means, 14 ECGs all fine also.

[Fishmanpa]

Something you posted less than a week ago....

"About 2 months ago I took some drugs and had a panic attack. It scared the hell out of me and put me off them for life. For the last 2 months I have developed terrible health anxiety, I've had over 14 ecgs and all sorts of blood test and x rays of chest etc. I'm 20 years old and I'm fit. I got the tests done and were all fine. Why is this I keep feeling so shit? Cause of my head thinking about irrational fears. A great quote I saw "once the doctor tells you you're fine you just have to believe them, anxiety will however make that impossible" - this might be true but we can beat this anxiety. The first way to beat it is To take a "**** it" approach, whatever will be will be and so long as a professional health care specialist gives you the all clear, go out and live your life as fruitful as you can, you only have one. Why fill it with worry? One day we may actually contract an illness and well have spent all these years of our lives in misery. Do the breathing exercises, and the best convincing you can do to yourself is to eat well, exercise regularly and stick a big finger up to anxiety whenever you can. Don't let it get you down, I've wasted the last 2 months of my life and I don't want to anymore."

Take the $$$ you're spending on ER visits, doctors and tests and use it to seek out therapy to learn how to address the dragon and put him in his place.

Positive thoughts

[colinmckee2]

I'd been going so great. I went back to work and the lighting and customers were freaking me out which reactivated my anxiety. How do I stop Thai light headedness and vertigo? It's what is bringing it all back :(

[Fishmanpa]

I can only answer you based on dealing with real physical issues I deal with. First off, I know I'm Ok. It's not some sinister thing like the cancer returning or another heart attack. I have days where I feel like I've been hit by a truck. Fatigue, pain, lightheaded etc. Yesterday was such a day. I attributed it to a long week at work, playing a gig on Friday night, being up late, not enough sleep and a cold rainy day that made me hurt to my bones.

I dealt with it by taking some ibuprofen and pushing through it. What other choice do I have? Am I going to sit around and feel sorry for myself? I don't have time for that to be honest. With anxiety, you're going to have some real physical symptoms. You know they're not sinister so you push through, tell the dragon to go (*^# himself and live your life. Like I get therapy for my physical issues, you should seek therapy for your mind. Acquire some tools to fight back. Your anxiety fired a shot at you. Learn how to fire back.

I have a daughter your age. She has anxiety and depression. She came to me to talk about it. I called her Mom and we made sure she got help. She's in therapy and on meds and doing great! Sure she has her moments but she has the tools to deal with it and the support she needs.

Positive thoughts

[colinmckee2]

Almost cried reading that message, thanks for the continued support. You've no idea how greatful I am. I hope your daughter gets to live her life fully one day and beats this!