MidnightCalm
27-04-15, 03:41
I panic about not panicking and it's horrible because in those very few moments of calm I make myself feel like crap again. Take tonight for example; was woke up by partner and panicked and paced a lot and had a wine to calm (I know I have a drinking problem I'm working on it). But now that I've calmed down Im panicked about not panicking! "Why am I not panicking? Is my body giving up? Why is my heart beating slower than usual, is it going to stop? My body is failing, this isn't normal. My breathing is slower than usual, are my lungs failing? I could fall asleep easily right now but is that because I'm dying? What if all my body slows to a halt?"
I don't know if is because I've been very anxious and very drunk lately but right now I feel odd. Not even panicked but just weak and like my body is stopping. Gimme a break :( do I need to have a racing heart and sweats and breqthingn problems just to feel like myself now? If my anxiety went would I be lonely without it? :( x
I don't know if is because I've been very anxious and very drunk lately but right now I feel odd. Not even panicked but just weak and like my body is stopping. Gimme a break :( do I need to have a racing heart and sweats and breqthingn problems just to feel like myself now? If my anxiety went would I be lonely without it? :( x