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xrose_fleurx
25-01-07, 12:10
Hello everyone..

I am Rose and from Brighton. I came to this just under a year ago whilst at the worst of my condition but cannot remember my login details! So thought I would re-register. I didn't make much of a contribution last time anyway. I know it might sound bad but I was in such a state that I found it very difficult to come on here and read about the frightening things that were happening to me.

Having got so much better now, slowly and at my own pace, my mind doesn't seem as fragile and I seem to be able to deal with little everyday things like getting out of bed now without panicking or having a permanent gripping feeling in my throat! My boundaries have got bigger too and thankfully able to go out further in the car (the most up to about 20 miles away so far - just once) and by walking (around the block on my own is the furthest - 20 min walk)! This feels amazing. Also able to be alone at home.

I am still left with alot of phobias and this includes getting the heart rate up! Walking up hills etc, long walks, going too far in a car, also motorways and traffic jams (was in one the other day for 2 mins so I made an emergency u-turn and got out of it! Luckily I had an escape otherwise would have had first panic attack for a few months!), travel by plane, boat, train, bus. I found pilates very helpful just after my bad period and have now progressed to aerobics (although I take this easy re heart rate thing and panic attacks are still constantly in my mind when at aerobics classes). I started by doing a workout DVD at home but very gently so as not to stir the feelings, I now go to classes in a sports centre as well. Was worried of the effects of staying home all the time whilst so agrophobic and not getting exercise. Reading was also helpful.

During my bad stage I started counselling (was so thankful that the counsellor lived just around the corner! as I crawled out of the car there every week a sniffling, red faced, quivering wreck) then a few months later a 10 week NHS anxiety managment course. This combined with bottles of rescue remedy, Kalms, water and nicorette inhalors, shades, music and strong mints taken with me everywhere I go, have all helped me get to this stage that I never thought I would be at again. I still take this emergency kit with me for the odd journey or long journeys but its progress. Otherwise I continue to carry rescue remedy, nicorette inhalor, mints and water with me al the time.

Refused to take the prescribed anti-depressants and I still have the unopened packet at home, this was a personal choice as couldn't face the side-effects. I did take St Johns Wort for months and months and have only just stopped taking it (not sure if an immunity is built up from it after a few months anyway). I also started taking the vitamin B complex, calcium and magnesium, fish oils and primrose oil every day since the breakdown, I think I read about these on here Was also recommended to take the primrose oil by the doctor as Panic Attacks intensifed just before time of each month.

Thought that by coming back it would help with the travel phobias and various things I have yet to battle, maybe also to give some hope to others. This is a great site and there is SO much help to look through!

Thanks guys x

mazz
25-01-07, 12:42
Hi and welcome back xrose.You sound just like me iam making progress slowly but still getting there.My driving was the one thing that hurt the most but thankfully now iam going further out of my comfort zone.I too refuse meds i dont want to mask my problems which is a personal choice of course , i know others need them and thats fine too.I take 2000mgs of primrose oil and omega 5 plus black colash vits.I call them my breakfast cocktail lol.Well they seem to be working apart from my skin getting better , my general anx is dying down and that dreaded time of the month is getting better too.I hope to chat to you again love from Mazz.

Helen300
25-01-07, 12:45
Hi Rose,

It so nice to hear a positive story. I'm battling with acute anxiety at the moment, but have also been doing well lately, managed to get out of the house and survive! With the use of my ipod, rescue remedy, and chewing gum!!

I went to see a counsellor for the first time yesterday and found it really helpful to learn that I have the power to re-train my mind using teqhniques to get my state of alert down from super high back to normal whatever normal is!! I know it will take a long time, but knowing there is hope makes me feel a bit better.

I also went to a pilates class last week and found although I was panicky and dizzy it was something that would help me. The lady was also trained in reiki and did some deep relaxation at the end of the class. I found it difficult to let my mind relax but felt it is something I might learn to achieve.

You sound like you are doing so well.

Well done and hope the site can help you further. It's helped me a lot, I even told my counsellor about it yesterday!

Helen x

xrose_fleurx
25-01-07, 13:24
Hi Mazz and Helen,

Thanks for the responses, good to hear you are both getting there too.

I understand what you mean Helen about the state of alert levels. My anxiety had built up inside so much over years that in the end it was like I was suddenly brain-washed and had my mind wiped. Not knowing or remembering what my normal feelings and thoughts used to be whilst walking down the road or just doing normal things without feeling so scared and without the doomed feeling. It was like my mind had been reset and needed retraining. I remember asking what I was suppposed to think about or feel whilst doing things like walking down a street as I couldn't remember and it had always been taken for granted.

I will have to find out about black colash vits Mazz, I have a breakfast cocktail too!

It's good to know we aren't alone in these things although not nice to know that others are suffering. Also encouraging to find similarities in our actions and coping techniques and to learn new ones!


x

sal
25-01-07, 14:05
Hi Xrose

Pleased to hear of your improvement and pleased you have come back to the site. So many people will appreciate your help and support.

Love Sal xx


Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.


"Life is a distance and to travel that distance you were given the strength and guidance to do so".

ceecee
25-01-07, 15:48
hi rose
welcome back to the forum!
take care
rach x

honeybee3939
25-01-07, 18:08
Hi Rose

And welcome, its lovely you have returned to give advice, and also to get support to help you futhur in your recovery.

Sounds like you have already made alot of progress, its always lovely to read about progress so thanks for sharing it with us.:D

Love

Andrea
xxx


"If you have a worry turn it into a problem, you cant solve worrys but you can solve problems"

kazzie
26-01-07, 22:25
WELCOME BACK ROSE:D

LUV KAZ X

ALWAYS LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE OF LIFE!!!!!!

trac67
27-01-07, 14:12
Welcome back Rose :D

Love

Trac xx

'Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain'

nomorepanic
27-01-07, 18:46
Hi Rose

Welcome back and thanks for the update. Sounds like you are doing all the right things and just have a few more hurdles to get over now.

Well done on all your progress.

Nicola

People will forget what you said
People will forget what you did
But people will never forget how you made them feel

manmoor
28-01-07, 22:20
Hi Rose,

Nice to meet you welcome back. xx

"When There Was Only One It Was Then That I Carried You."

Lynnann
29-01-07, 09:16
Hi Rose.

Nice to meet you and welcome back, well done on your progress so far

Lynnann

Remember tomorrow is a bright new day