I had one whole day off.from mental health yesterday

[gregcool]

Hi guys..yesterday (sataday) for no reason ,for the first time in months and months.i felt good.nothing worried me anymore,even my most recent worry..literaly had a day off from it all..i felt relaxed and quite uplifted..i havnt had a day like this for many many months..woke up this morning,and im back to my normal state of mental health..how can i have one day off out of the blue like this nothing in my life had changed so confused how it happend

[Crystalhiggs]

Greg that's great news, did you do anything different yesterday? Was it lovely weather? Was it Eurovision? :) so pleased you had a good day, hold onto that, if you can have one good day you can have another! Ps are you still on both your meds I seem to remember you were going to come off one of them?

[gregcool]

Crystle.no i didnt do anything different.the weather was cloudy .got up as normal had my usual breakfast.then walked into town as i always do..when in town i started to feel relaxed and wasnt obsesing over my usual thoughts.so just sat around for a couple of hrs.then walked home.then done my normal stuff in doors.so through the day and into the evening i just felt relaxed and stress free.all my usual worries had just gone.i was able to watch tv in piece.my mind had switched off like a light switch..nothing out of the ordinary..so dont understand how this happend.but today im back to unwell me again....

---------- Post added at 10:12 ---------- Previous post was at 10:10 ----------

Im still on my normal dose of meds.i didnt cut down yet..

[MyNameIsTerry]

Its frustrating, its illogical...its GAD!

I think back to my relapse and to my first breakdown - I was anxious 24/7 & depressed a lot and thats all for months each time. Then I started recovering as I would have the odd better day and as time went by I improved and had more better days and with each stage the bad days became more tolerable.

When you are in the worst stages, good days don't happen, even decent days don't happen.

So, maybe you are starting your journey, Greg?

[gregcool]

Makes sence terry.i hope you are right.id love to have more better days.i feel flat today again and keep wishing i felt the way i did yesterday.very weird just out of the blue like that for no reason..i felt a bit like the old me.i was walking with my head up and not with it hanging down to the ground as i do ..i want more days like that..well im up now and going down to B&Q to get a blind for my front room..that will keep me busy for a couple of hrs..you got any plans for the bank holiday terry

[Crystalhiggs]

What Terry said... :) just great that you had a good day, hopefully many more to come. It's all so damn slow isn't it, that's what frustrates me the most! Still, onwards and upwards :)

[gregcool]

Thanks crystle..more good days to come i hope...funny tho isnt it..you can be down for months and months feeling you will never get better.you suffer in ways most people wouldnt understand..you feel you have nothing to live for.life couldnt feel anymore bleek..then out of no where for no reason,BANG !!! Like a switch,it all goes for a day..what an earth goes on in the brain...i felt like id come out of a comer for a day...

[MyNameIsTerry]

Ah, but Greg you now have your daughter back in your life. If nothing else has changed, maybe the impact of the time you spend with her is having a subconscious influence on you? Maybe you are, at a subconscious level, finding some good to get better for?

Nah, nothing planned. Just the usual really. When you don't work the bank holidays don't seem to mean anything if you don't have kids to do things with.

[gregcool]

You could be right terry about my girl being back in my life.may e now iv experianced her staying over at my flat having that contact with her..i do look forward to seeing her sooooo much and count the days.she is my world and gives me hope..im like you mate,bank hol etc.just hang around the flat.but today im in town to get a blackout blind for my flat.breaks the day up.and got my head phones on for tunes.

[MyNameIsTerry]

Yeah, get out and get some of the good weather (hopefully!) and have a wander. B&Q is a nice place to walk around with it being pretty quiet and so well spaced out.

Its all ups & downs though so you have to always remember that the good days may be followed by bad ones but also that the bad ones may be following by the good ones. And don't question why you feel good, just go with it. Don't question when the bad days will come back because they will come regardless and all you end up doing is bringing them back sooner.

I can remember a couple of months ago you were saying about your daughter not replying to you and you were cut up about it. You've got a really big part of your life back and she is going to have an impact. She is going to being you more positivity and that is going to have an impct on your moods and make gradual changes changes to your subconscious in a positive way. Those new memories are bringing more focus on happiness as opposed to all the negative stuff that has been dominating your mind.

[gregcool]

Ill try to bare that in mind terry.take the good days and bad..its hard tho,cos when you have a good day,you want more.i do have good memories with my girl,im also seeing my older brother more nowadays.he came over last week with his two girls and stayed over night,so i had a house full which i liked.my girl is starting to text me on and off through the weeks and always says how much she loves and misses me,which makes me feel needed again..well iv been to b&q and got my blind..took me a bit of time ,but its up and looks good.just going to watch a film now.its just started to rain so im in the right place...

[MyNameIsTerry]

Well you've been talking about the isolation & loneliness for a long time on here and now you have someone who wants you around so thats got to have an impact on you at a subconscious level.

The more we invoke the positive side of the brain, the more it builds new pathways & becomes more dense. The opposite happens to the negative side.

[gregcool]

Thanks terry.your right there mate..thanks