Normal

[Avasmummy_x]

Ever have that thought 'will I ever feel normal'

Remember what I was like a year ago and im not gonna lie it makes me sad. Such a different person now. Even with meds and cbt - I don't know if and how I'll ever be the old me!

[Dazza123]

I don't think you will ever be the old you, you will be a new you on medication, thats how I see it, its sad, but something went wrong in our brains so I feel the meds create a new you that is more able to cope, so we are the same, but a little bit different, sort of...

I do mourn my old self, but he has long gone so I need to build a new me. Luckily I still have my looks so its not all bad :D

[Davit]

I don't miss my old self, I had anxiety all my life, that was my normal. So much I missed out on but so much I enjoyed, grabbing every bit of happiness in a world I didn't fit in. Such a difference, my day is full of the same moments I used to grab at only now they are here 24/7.

[hanshan]

Anxiety was also my normal for years. It got me out of bed, kept me moving, sometimes overtook me. I still managed to enjoy things, regardless.

Now I think I'm still 'old me', but also 'new me'. Also, growing older means I have to give up some of my younger life, even though I know it's still there inside me.

[Davit]

Definitely a fact with growing older.

[Avasmummy_x]

I miss my old self so much.

A year ago I could take my daughter anywhere alone, she wasn't stuck in the house with mummy cause I'm too scared to leave.
I could go out with friends without having to worry about having a panic attack in a bar.
Getting a bus to anywhere without the panic attacks.
Be high up in a shopping centre without an
Intrusive thought/urge to jump off.

I miss the old me massively it was only a year ago I was normal. Ive had anxiety all my life but it never effected my independance and who I was. I was in control I guess.

Now I'm just a trainwreck who sits at home all day anxious :-(

[jake1234]

Now I'm just a trainwreck who sits at home all day anxious :-(

Could be worse. I'm a trainwreck FORCED to work and being anxious all day at work. I'm surprised at how I even function.

[hanshan]

Hi Jake,

I had a time when I was an anxiety trainwreck still stumbling through each day at work. Eventually, I had to give up that job and go into temporary 'retirement' for a while (fortunately I was able to do that). Then I went back to work part-time, and now full-time (and not anxious). Good luck - it is possible to get better and grow out of current difficulties.

[jake1234]

Thanks, hanshan. Knowing that this is temporary is a big help.

Just how temporary, who knows.

[goldsounds]

Ever have that thought 'will I ever feel normal'

Remember what I was like a year ago and im not gonna lie it makes me sad. Such a different person now. Even with meds and cbt - I don't know if and how I'll ever be the old me!

I know what you mean as I constantly look back at how I was before anxiety took over and wish I could go back to that. But I realise now that this isn't something that will just evaporate and that I have to carry on my experiences and move forward to be the happiest I can be. Best of luck.

[SarahH]

Although I agree about "before" anxiety. I think I am a better person now.

Sarah

[Avasmummy_x]

I definitely appreciate things more and never take anything for granted.
But my life in general - sucks :-(

[SarahH]

But it WILL get better:)