I don't know how to deal with this anymore, i'm so exhausted...

[sweetlover88]

Ever since i've had my first skipped/extra beats in July 2014, i feel like i'm not living anymore. I'm constanly anxious/nervous along with some shaking, feeling of dizzyness, and constanly (when i say constanly, it's CONSTANLY) expecting my heart to stop and to skip. Everytime i take the bus to go out of the city, i'm sweating in bus and very nervous because i'm worried about my heart stopping. This ain't living and some nights bring me to tears literally. I'm 27 and i'm trying very hard to make a good living and make something good out of my life (i'm a student living in a foreigner country) and i've spent almost 1000$ already on this 'heart' condition. EVERYTHING came back clears (i didn't had holter though, my last holter was in 2009 before i had these skipped/extra beats sensation) but i had:

- EKG (at least 50, not even exagerating.)
- Blood test (thyroid and to see if i had anterior heart attack)
- Stress test
- x-ray
- echocardiogram

All of these tests were in November 2014.

Now i started slightly to increase my alcohol consumption (only beers) to around 4 to 6 cans 4 times a week because i feel like when i have the alcohol buzz, it's the only time i don't overthink and i can relax. i'm so tired of this. Why can't i enjoy life and live instead of always worrying about dying?

Those extra/skipped/fluttering are scaring the shit out of me. I went through a depression too recently so i don't know if this can play a role (i'm constanly worrying about lacking of money here and having to go back to my country (in which i had terrible memories and never want to go back))

Anyone in the same situation? :(

Thanks all,
Mathieu

[SJL]

Yes, mine started around then as well.

I go a couple of weeks without any (that I can feel) then out of nowhere while I'm sat relaxing I'll get quite a few ecoptic beats in a row which scares the **** out of me and puts me back to square one with anxiety.

I only ever used to get single ectopics but now when I get them there seems to be a run of them before they stop.

I see a cardiologist this month but from the stories I've read we'll probably not be able to catch them because of how random they happen or if we do catch one I'll be told it's benign and to get on with life which is easier said than done when you're one of the few people in the world who have the horrible ability to actually feel your heart skip or double beat. It's not something you can just get over easily, I'd rather take a punch in the face everyday than deal with this.

[sweetlover88]

I definitly take the punch in the face too.. lol.

My cardiologist didn't seem worried when i had my tests though. He told me that if i wanted 'peace of mind' i should do holter but after all the other tests came back normal he said that if i do indeed have skipped/extra beats (which i do have but he didn't catch them on any ekg) he said they're almost always benign on a healthy heart. The only thing he seemed to worry about and wanted to check out were:

- Stress Test
- Echo
- Blood Test (Tropanin T)

when all of these were ok, he just laughed and told me to 'stress less, do more physical activity' easier said than done.. I think i should need to speak with a cardiologist for a good 30 minutes and ask him about all my worries.

As u said, it sucks when u get few ectopics in a row after weeks of not having any then have to go back to square one.. that takes away so much energy.

Do you actually sometimes feel tired/lack of energy because of that?