I think I want to be ill.

[miss diagnosis]

This is gonna sound nuts but after being with my therapist a while im starting to realise things.

My boyfriend is in a band that are becoming really sucsessful.He is on tour at the moment. Next month he is going to Americia for 2 weeks.
I dont think I can cope at home by myself for that long. I hate being byself for even the night. I half hope i do find out i have cervical cancer when i go for my smear next week cos that way he will stay.

You probably think im mad.

[sophieunderscore]

You are not mad at all.

When I was younger I used to wish that I got ill with like chicken pox or measles - something serious but not deadly! or that I would break a bone or something. I used to wrap my arm in bandages at the smallest knock or sprain because it got me noticed (I feel awful admitting this)

You want someone to look after you and care for you and that's normal, maybe try speaking to your boyfriend about your worries? Do you have anybody else close?

[kilvosa]

Hi There
My hubby is always away so i know where youre coming from im lucky if i see him for two weekends a month , thats why im always in the chat room . I dont know anyone where i live as we moved a year ago here so feel free to pm me anytime or im on msn it does help to talk to someone and im sure you willbe fine. Have you any friends that could keep you company in the evening?
Take care
Anne xx

[peach]

i totally understand, my partner is about to go interstate for nearly two weeks as well..and my house isnt secure at all...
i think ill be going to bed early a lot in the next little while...lol..

i dont have any friends to keep me company either..think ill be watching a lot of movies..
you will be fine, and know your not alone in this...
take care

[kilvosa]

Hi miss diagnosis
Join us on the live chat room you wont be on your own then and it does helpPeach know what you mean about house been secure mines still like a building site lol we moved into it derelict! Security system arrived this week just got to wait till hubby comes home to instal it then i think ill feel better.
Take care
Anne xx

[miss diagnosis]

thanks so much for your kindness everyone
He is away this weekend but im having my friends over for karaoke anc champagne!!!! will spend 2moro with our son just hanging out
I will go into the chat. I used to all the time but i got a 2nd and now a 3rd job so ive been busy!