Irrational thoughts, obsessing.

[MidnightCalm]

I'm not sure if I'm going out of my mind or not, or what this can be attitudes to. I hope it's just my anxiety playing up because of the amount of symptoms I've had lately.
I keep finding myself obsessing over small things until the point of becoming scared of them and to me that makes me a little crazy right?
Yesterday I was literally panicking because I sat at my window and thought about where I live, I then got panicky because it seemed weird I lived there and then when I was picturing the area it seemed so foreign and scary



I don't know if it's just my imagination running wild or if I'm becoming crazy.
Today I read a post of here about suicide and suddenly started thinking about suicide then worried about what if I can't stop myself doing it because it feels normal to my brain at some point.
I was sat with my partner yesterday and I had to keep leaving the room because I felt so spacey and detached from the moment and kept looking at them and the TV and thinking this doesn't feel real, doesn't feel safe, is this all life is?
I'm also cutting down on drinking by over a half because it was making me poorly and I was drinking over the top amounts so that could be addicting to my anxiety but right now I haven't even got out of bed yet and I'm feeling extremely exhausted and just scared and not looking forward to the day :(

[MyNameIsTerry]

I don't think you are going crazy at all. Aside from the fact you seem to be able to comprehend things very well, you are also talking about issues that can be seen across many threads.

Questioning what is real or what is the point can easily be seen in threads about DP/DR or depression. Many of us go through some of that if not all of it as anxiety makes us feel so strange and we end up thinking we might be losing our minds. But we aren't because people who do can't see it or can't try to rationalise it or are stuck in delusions so they can't even see there is a problem. That doesn't sound like you at all.

I don't know about how the alcohol withdrawal is affecting you and if you feel that it could be this or that you feel physically ill because of it, contact your GP or one of the phone services for support because its going to be a tough thing to get through.

If you have suicidal thoughts, because of the alcohol issues, be on the safe side and ask for help from medical professionals as you have more than anxiety to cope with here and they could have ways to support you through it.

Suicide is a complex issue. Suicidal thoughts may not even be connected to it, I've had many myself over the years with anxiety & depression. I can honestly tell you that it wasn't really what I wanted to do, I just wanted to escape the pain I was in, somehow. I never did anything because I have a family who I couldn't put through that pain and therapists have this very question in their harm monitoring forms to understand what keeps you on track when these thoughts come. BUT if you find yourself looking into methods of how or where, then contact someone immediately and let them help you.

There is also no reason you could have them.

[lindy lou 2]

I agree totally ,with what Terry has advised. If you were going crazy , you probably wouldn't realise it.
I too have had thoughts of suicide, I once even cut my arm, quite badly, then I was horrified at what I had done ! I too could not put my husband & small family & friends through that, I just want to feel better, but do seek help if you start planning it please.
I have not had the unreal feelings that you speak about, maybe that is caused by intense anxiety ?
Is there something going on in your life that is causing this anxiety ?

[Oosh]

Trick here is not worrying about it and to NOT go down those rabbit holes simply because it popped into your head.

Im like this a lot. I have always looked at things in different ways and, like most here, can OFTEN stumble upon a way to see things that makes me uneasy.

You can get that initial suggestion and explore it, beef it up, make it bigger and more substantial, give it more power.
Or you can recognise it as just another one of those tricky suggestions that give you an unhelpful way to see things and just let it go. It WILL go if you feel you can let it.

Dont feel you have to explore it.
Dont feel its a danger.
Dont feel it has meaning.

Just, drop it like you thought of the most boring thought about a politicians shoe choices or something. "not interested, mental junk, an undesirable, unproductive way to see things" and move on.

I am largely recovered from anxiety now. Ive learned from this site that i suffered from depersonalisation and all of that side of things in the past. I dont get freeked out by it anymore. But i do still get those initial perspectives, suggestions that hold the potential to freek me out.

As anxiety rises everything seems surreal. You dont need to be afraid of it. It comes, it goes. It doesnt mean anything.

And then theres that common fear in every anxious persons mind "does it mean im going crazy?" And thats probably why your anxiety levels are rising and eveythings becoming surreal. THAT is your reason to be fearful. Its the underlying meaning youre giving all of these things. But youre NOT going crazy, so relax. Knowing that should lower your anxiety.

Dont explore the rabbit holes. They mean NOTHING. Theyre at best unhelpful. Forget them as soon as you thought of them. I have to do it every day.

I have my way of seeing the world and what works for me and i stay in it. If i step out of it momentarily due to a scary suggestion/perspective, i just return to it. It calms me down and gives me my confidence back. Without it id probably be swimming constantly in anxiety like i used to be. You have to have some solid ground underneath your feet, positive healthy perspectives to return to and calm you down.

Alcohol makes it worse, without doubt. I gave up years ago because the above got multiplied by 100 when id wake up the morning after drinking.

[Jay9287]

Hiya ,I use to get images in my head of committing suicide and hurting loved ones. I also wondered if I was going crazy and use to think I needed to hurt myself so I couldn't hurt anyone I loved. This unfortunately was my anxious mind playing tricks. I had CBT which really helped. I have had a relapse 5 years later on the thought has come into my head a couple of time but I whatever it. The thought then disappears.The more you focus on that thought or the feelings it gives you the more and more you think of it. Try and say to yourself 'whatever' when the thoughts come up and carry on as like nothing has happened. For the image side I changed it into something funny for example instead of thinking of myself using an object to hurt my mum I turned it into a feather duster lol. It takes time to overcome but just keep saying it every time your mind goes in that direction. As you said you pick up on things after you read it as well, so you may now think of hurting a loved one. WHATEVER it straight away. Hope this helps :)