Angry at myself for being anxious

[Carla]

Hi,

I haven't posted here much but at the moment I'm really struggling with something. For the last three weeks or so I've been feeling really, really angry at myself - this started after finally admitting to my counsellor that I rarely leave the house because I feel so anxious. I told her how abnormal I feel because it seems like everyone else is able to go out without even thinking twice about it. I know there's nothing to be scared of so why can't I go out and do things without having huge panic attacks.

She told me that I need to accept my anxiety - not give in to it but accept that at the moment this is a part of me and stop being so hard on myself about it. I just have no idea how to do that and the anger I feel towards myself is building and building. Does anyone have any ideas for how I can start being more accepting of my anxiety?

Thanks
Carla

[Elle]

Accept your anger in the knowledge that it won't last forever. Everything changes and evolves. As you overcome your problems you will become happier with yourself. Believe that your panic attacks will become less and that you will be able to go out. Others have done it, so can you.

Are there any people reading this who have overcome this particular problem? I'm sure there are.

Elle

[Insomniac]

Hi Carla

I don't feel angry, though I do feel guilty when the things we do as a family are affected by my anxiety. But I have to remind myself when I think that way ... "other people cope with worse so why can't I cope?" . that this is an illness like other illness. If you were diabetic or broke your arm or something you wouldn't feel angry with yourself. Try to accept that it is an illness and something which you can recover from.

Hope this helps.:)


Lisa.

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.

[davidthegnome]

Yes, I used to get really mad at myself some times. Especially when I was cooped up in my room most of the time and doing nothing but laying around and watching disney movies. It was probably the anger that made me get up and start doing things again. So, in a way, I think anger can be a good thing when properly channeled.

If it grows and stagnates it can really bug you too. I'd say the best response is to accept the anger you're feeling and try to use it in a positive way. Like maybe go for a run when you feel angry, or watch a happy movie.

Remind yourself that you have a real issue and that it is not your fault. Anxiety and panic attacks happen to all sorts of people and it's not like any of us went around asking for it, demanding it, or wanting it. It's just something that happens, I don't know all the reasons for it, but I do know it's not the fault of the person who is suffering. Please don't blame yourself for it.

I'm kind of out of things to say. Some times I get angry myself and when I get angry I get afraid of being angry, it can be a vicious cycle for me. I'm managing it better than I used to though and in time you will be able to manage it better too.

Good luck and God Bless you,

David

[spuds]

The idea of accepting your anxiety and not fighting it is part of the Claire Weekes approach to overcoming anxiety. I really recommend her book if you haven't heard of it before. It really helped me a lot (every other message I post ends up mentioning Claire Weekes, but she really is that good)

http://www.whsmith.co.uk/whs/go.asp?ISBN=0722531559&DB=220&Menu=Books