Feel like I'm going crazy

[natalie yog]

I've had this going on 7 weeks and my doctor put it down to my anxiety/depression that I'm currently taking Propranolol 40mg twice a day for the last two weeks.
When I'm sitting down or laying down it feels like my body is constantly moving even though when I ask people they say I'm completely still. Even when I'm walking I feel like I'm on a ship and when I'm laying down my body feels light as if I'm floating on water.
I've had numerous tests apart from a M.R.I. or cat scan since my doctor who I have to say has been amazing to me tells me to trust him that I don't need them. I've also just started wearing my new glasses this week after having my first eye test in over 15 years and I also had the all clear on my eyes too.
Deep down I KNOW it isn't anything serious but I battle these horrible thoughts 24hrs a day for all these weeks and I feel like it's driving me crazy. All these thoughts of being seriously I'll and even dying wondering what happens after we die and what would happen to my family terrify me. Can health anxiety really do all this ?

[tmckenzie-orr]

its horrible your just on a rocky ship, and in absolute flight/fight mode tense and you know yourself its not anything serious just anxiety but i know myself how it is when u dont feel right its horrible to tell if its real or anxiety but after the test and stuff you know its only anxiety u need to relax, if you ever need somebody to talk to just message , its horrible how health anxiety is

[natalie yog]

It's horrible that it's not just me it affects it's my family too like just now my mum had to talk me through a bad panic attack. Sometimes I pretend that there's nothing wrong with me so I don't worry anyone even though I feel like I'm dying inside.

[tmckenzie-orr]

the worse thing is tryng to act ur ok ur better of letting it out and sayin how u really are

[natalie yog]

I know but it is hard when I'm asking family members the same thing everyday like..Do you think I have a tumour? If it was something serious I would be really I'll right now?..and a million more questions later. I must annoy the hell out of them.

[tmckenzie-orr]

lol its horrible, does this mole look ok? are u sure does it look normal? its seeking reasurance we need to try and stop asking and stop it , we are wasting so much time of our life worrying for nothing letting our anxiety take over, one of my customers today she must be 70-80 and she has been in hospital for 3 weeks and she has liver cancer terminal its horrible she said she gotta be strong and fight it, Think thats real ours is not real ares is just fear and scared of having something when we dont !! its so silly i have well and truly had enough of worrying now

[natalie yog]

I know what you mean a close family friend has been diagnosed with bowel cancer but she just gets on with thingseven though right now she's going through chemo, radiation therapy and will be having surgery next week. That's why I hate being the way I am because I'm crying over something deep down I KNOW I haven't got while there are people that actually do have illnesses that don't let it control their lives.

[tmckenzie-orr]

It's absolutely bonkers really I said to myself I'm gonna really try to really beat this now I'm getting fed up with it, how old are u ? And where abouts u from? What do you like doing for hobbies?

---------- Post added at 22:18 ---------- Previous post was at 22:06 ----------

But then boredom takes over and I decide to take pics of the mole with the scratch looking thing through it with skin vision the app, and it says medium risk when yesterday it said low risk now I'm having a minor panic attack lol

---------- Post added at 23:22 ---------- Previous post was at 22:18 ----------

Ok I rubbed Vaseline into it and the scratch has came off haha lol, and now took another pic with skin vision app and said low risk haha I am crazyyy I'm sure it's a boredom ocd

[natalie yog]

I'm from the northwest and nearly every hobby that I used to love doing has been ruined by health anxiety.
I'm the only one in my family covered in moles including my face so in the summer I have to wear the strongest sunscreen. Everyday I always notice a new one pop up but the strange thing is they've never bothered me.
How about we swap health anxieties you take my 'tumour' and I'll take your mole.

[tmckenzie-orr]

i would rather not have any thanks lol, I just hope my CBT works for me if not I might take tablets but don't want too I want to do it without as never really agreed with tabs, it's so weird I put my health anxiety starting down to being really stressed, and then the hot curry I had burnt my throat then I had throat tightness then I googled I blame Google hahaha

[natalie yog]

Ha ha I know what you mean. I blame Google and the media too especially those bloody adverts about different illnesses and saving money for your funeral they drive me up the wall.

[tmckenzie-orr]

haha, Its crazy how our mind works, We have to be stressed or easily worried for them things to even sink in our brains lol, I feel so pathetic when i think about it, But we act fast without thinking properly,