come so far now feel hitting a brick wall

[stars22]

i have gad and depression i was in such a dark place my life was going nowhere and i was sat in airh the curtains closed last year after i had random heart racing attacks i was then messed about by doctors and hospital playing waiting game to see if i had a heart problem holter normak and echo so got laughed at and told anxiety since then my anxiety went crazy i did have anxiety onky from the fact of the hospital and doctors laughing in my face ect anyways i got out of it abit and started going out started having nights out been social ect but i don't ever get the excited feeling anymore just scared that exciting feeling has disappeared i always seem grumpy and boring now i started having chest pain at a aparty the other night i was drinking not that i was drunk because my body doesn't do that anymore i kind of sober before im drunk anyways i got random chest pains weird ones never had this pain before and a coupe thuds that took my breathe completely away tonight i feel it again really bad pain in my stomach this time it went to my chest through left arm and im scared this is it i have quiet alot of signs of cervical cancer im getting checked out at clinic tomorrow im scared that all of this is going to put me back to where i was in the "dark days" it makes me sock looking back on how ill i was hoe suicidal i was with nobody to help or care really i had support but just didn't feel like it qnd felt doctors was fed up and laughing at me im so scared my life is going ti go back there soon or worse it will end im doing my driving lessons now and trying ti be normal i just dont feel very normal sad upset angry scared is now normal to me does anyone else understand me ?

[misskittie]

I completely understand where you're coming. I'm right now stuck in my cycle of reassurance seeking from doctors and such. I'm trying so hard to get out of it but it can be so difficult when you have symptoms you are worried about. The thing at the party sounds like a classic panic attack to me and what I have gone through many many times. I have luckily been able to overcome the panic attacks the past few months by just telling myself it's just a panic attack and it's not going to hurt me. Even tho it seems so real and like your heart is going to give out its not and just remind yourself of that each time and they do become fewer and further between. As for the cervical cancer I would probably be getting that checked out as well if I were you but then you need to take your doctor's word for it if they tell you that you are fine. Really try not to double guess it because that just leads into the vicious cycle. Hopefully if you try these and put your foot down to yourself you will be able to overcome this again and even more quickly then before. You've done it once you can do it again :)

[stars22]

thankyou means alot ! i also hqve overcome panic attacks i rarely have them its more of my mind racing thoughts now and physical symtoms 24/7 but i suppose it could of been q mini panic attack im trying my best to stay away from doctors i didn't got for months went 3 weeks ago it helped then it wore off after the week had past trying my best feel like somebody is holding my feet still as i try to run its horrible hopefully it will be wll good news tomorrow when i get checked out you sound like you are doing well and very strong keep it up x