swanbird2012
30-07-15, 15:27
Hello, I just returned from a holiday in Magaluf, Spain. It is a wild little island and its hard to keep up with the nightlife, this was the first holiday without my parents and with my friends instead and yes I looked forward to it but on the night of leaving I couldn't stop crying, I didn't want to get on the plane (I'm from the UK)
Eventually arriving there during the day was great, the sun was stunning and our hotel was quite family orientated so that was a bit of a comfort but as night came, we hit the 'Magaluf Strip' and there was things like foam parties and all that came to my head (what if I forget how to breath in that foam or neon paint parties what if it goes in my eyes and I can't see) I looked around at everyone having fun and I couldn't find that happiness they had and it felt like I was in this bubble out from reality, I left in a taxi, cried in the hotel room and wanted my mum so bad. the next few nights I shook it off and went out, but the saturday night was terrifiying, I felt sick and I kept thinking I couldn't breathe and I thought what if I die here and the fear just built up so the next 4 nights I sat in and cried and I didn't eat, as soon as I landed home on the wednesday, I felt so happy to be home but I've noticed I can get into a frenzy of panic lately and I feel like I've lost a bit of myself, I'm 18 years old and now when I go to a night club I look forward to going home and just happy I survived the night, I don't like my style of thinking and I hope someone can come back with something similar and how they are getting through it or got through it, thankyou. :D
Eventually arriving there during the day was great, the sun was stunning and our hotel was quite family orientated so that was a bit of a comfort but as night came, we hit the 'Magaluf Strip' and there was things like foam parties and all that came to my head (what if I forget how to breath in that foam or neon paint parties what if it goes in my eyes and I can't see) I looked around at everyone having fun and I couldn't find that happiness they had and it felt like I was in this bubble out from reality, I left in a taxi, cried in the hotel room and wanted my mum so bad. the next few nights I shook it off and went out, but the saturday night was terrifiying, I felt sick and I kept thinking I couldn't breathe and I thought what if I die here and the fear just built up so the next 4 nights I sat in and cried and I didn't eat, as soon as I landed home on the wednesday, I felt so happy to be home but I've noticed I can get into a frenzy of panic lately and I feel like I've lost a bit of myself, I'm 18 years old and now when I go to a night club I look forward to going home and just happy I survived the night, I don't like my style of thinking and I hope someone can come back with something similar and how they are getting through it or got through it, thankyou. :D