New Girl Here

[catsandnaps]

Well after spending a few weeks creeping in the shadows on here, I decided to join and put myself out there! :shades:


I have been sick since October 2014. Initially it was a rapid heart rate. It *absolutely* was not anxiety, I assured everyone, because I did not feel anxious. Out of the blue, BAM, sweating, heart palps, tremors and shaking. I KNEW it had to be a heart attack, thyroid condition, adrenal cancer... if my Google skills were any better, I could add to that list of what I thought was wrong! :shrug:


So I got a cardiac workup, CT scans, xrays, blood work, and nearly every test imaginable. Turns out, my physical body is healthy. My doctors all said it is *just* anxiety, and I needed psychiatric help. But they didn't give me this news in the compassionate, cool way, like, "Hey, you're struggling through some weird things right now, but you will be fine if you work a little bit to help yourself heal." The news was delivered more like, "Quit crying and get on medication, ya nutcase." *Cue the bully in my mind to start telling myself how pathetic I am*


Fast forward a couple months, and I've accepted the facts. After reading the "Symptoms" article on here, I realized I have a serious anxiety problem that has taken away my job, my home, and my happiness.


I'm 31, and I spend most of my days at my parents' house, fearfully waiting for the next attack. I am afraid to be away from home, I am afraid to drive, and I am afraid to fall asleep. .Actually I'm afraid of almost everything, but that's the short list!


I tried medication years ago, many kinds of medications, and I had very negative reactions. I currently go to therapy every other week and I do acupuncture sessions. My diet is a no sugar, low carb, high protein diet, which has improved my anxiety somewhat.


Ultimately, I am struggling. I feel like I have lost my life to my anxiety, and it feels very lonely. I am so embarrassed by my behavior that it is hard to verbalize my feelings to anyone I know. I hope I can find more people on here like me, and hopefully offer some encouragement to someone else while trying to help myself.


Thanks for sticking it out through my blathering. :emot-wanttohug:

[venusbluejeans]

Hiya catsandnaps and welcome to NMP :welcome:

Why not take a look at our articles on our home page, they contain a wealth of information and are a great starting place for your time on the forum.

I hope you find the as site helpful and informative as I have and that you get the help and support you need here and hope that you meet a few friends along the way :yesyes:

[Zim]

Hello and welcome Catsandnaps :welcome:

You will find many friends here who suffer from identical symptoms and similar thought patterns.

I can understand how difficult it is because I've been in exactly the same situation but the important thing is not to view your anxiety like that. You say you're embarrassed by your behaviour. Well, you shouldn't be. You are behaving completely normal as a sufferer of anxiety.

It's a debilitating illness and it's a struggle to control. We're all in the same boat as you'll soon find out. Good luck. :)

[Zeldagirl]

I can relate. I am 31 as well and anxiety has turned my life upside down. I too was convinced I had a physical reason and had so many test run. I did discover I have thyroid disease in the process but the doctors tell me that my levels are within range so that is not the cause of my anxiety. So I discovered a lifelong illness on top of everything else and that didn't help anything :( anyway, welcome and hope you feel better soon!

[Ohforf]

Welcome! You are not alone. Are you thinking of trying medicine again?

[sial72]

Hi and welcome, pleeeenty of people with same symptoms here, so no need to be shy on NMP...
Have you ever tried supplementing with Magnesium? Xx

[catsandnaps]

Thanks for the welcome everyone, I'm glad to be here!

Ohforf - Not yet considering medication. I know it's an option, but my body tends to do funky things with psych meds.

sial72 - Never knew about magnesium until I got here. I'm reading about it right now. I've also learned about Remedy Rescue on here. I might try both.

[Bella100]

Hello! I am new here aswell. Just reading through your post I was interested that you don't want to use medication, I am currently the same, I have tried different ones in the past but at the moment I'm trying to find other ways of coping! X

[catsandnaps]

Hello! I am new here aswell. Just reading through your post I was interested that you don't want to use medication, I am currently the same, I have tried different ones in the past but at the moment I'm trying to find other ways of coping! X

I haven't had luck with medication, and I have been tried a bunch. It's like sometimes they will settle my anxiety, but I'll start hallucinating or get so depressed. I'm always interested in hearing how some people can take them and get great results, and some of us can't function with them. I'm doing the same thing - trying to scout out alternatives.

[Superworrier]

Welcome Hun x :hugs:

[Zim]

Catsandnaps - Ha ha. It's funny that you should say some people have a lot of luck and others don't because you're correct of course but then there's the people like me. The pills gave me the boost I needed to become pro-active in order to start to fight back against anxiety. However, I still suffer from the side effects occasionally but in all honesty, I think it's worth the sacrifice. I felt super anxious when I initially started taking my antidepressants but that subsided rapidly.

[andreamartinez]

I'm also new here. I just want to say to everyone and also to you.

[catsandnaps]

Catsandnaps - Ha ha. It's funny that you should say some people have a lot of luck and others don't because you're correct of course but then there's the people like me. The pills gave me the boost I needed to become pro-active in order to start to fight back against anxiety. However, I still suffer from the side effects occasionally but in all honesty, I think it's worth the sacrifice. I felt super anxious when I initially started taking my antidepressants but that subsided rapidly.

Zim, This is a good point! I've also been told how taking meds can give you the boost you need to change your behavior. Then when the behavior changes, the anxiety will decrease, and the meds can be reduced, if the meds are doing funny things. I'm glad you've found something that helps!!

---------- Post added at 14:39 ---------- Previous post was at 14:37 ----------


I'm also new here. I just want to say to everyone and also to you.

Hi, andrea! Everyone is nice so far, and I hope you can find some hope on here!!:bighug1:

[MandiMoo]

Hi Catandnaps,

I am new here too and like you have been reading the forums and now thought I would post. I suffer with Bi-Polar (diagnosed in my early twenties). I am now in my forties and have been dealing with these issues most of my adult life. I have suffered with general anxiety disorder and now more recently (the last few years health anxiety). I was doing really well until last year when I had a wobble with my moods (due to stress at work) which lead to general feelings of anxiety (not sleep well, hot and cold sweats, palpatations etc) to health anxiety. I am currently in another bout of HA. I have some tummy problems, which after a trip to Dr Google I am now panicking about pancreatic and stomach cancer. I have had loads of tests so far and all are normal. I am now waiting for an endoscopy. I believe that most of my anxiety issues stem from childhood and a fear of everything that I cannot control. Once I have my tummy issues under control and hopefully the tests all come back normal, I really do need to try and address this HA 'fear' or I it will get worse. I also struggle with change and fear of loss of control and for me I think it is the crux of it, I don't really know how to address it, which is why I am hoping that with support and understanding of others experiences on the forum I might find a way through and this is helping already, just knowing others like yourself are there and hoping for the same. Just talking helps sometimes.

love
MandiMoo

[white1989]

Hi catsandsnaps,

im relatively new here as well and it's done wonders for my anxiety reading through everyone's posts on this site! before I found this I was convinced I was a freak/weirdo/destined to die miserable and misunderstood, but its amazing to see how many people feel the same as us!! I suffer with terrible health anxiety and terrible symptoms like heart problems/breathing problems/chest pain daily never know what's going to crop up next! About 3 years ago I went from fun loving party girl to terrified quivering social-recluse over night! hope you find some solace in this sight and feel free to drop me a message to share experiences/get some reassurance! take care x

[flisco]

Hello

I just thought I'd say hello and welcome! I'm new too and have found this forum really supportive so I hope you do too. I really sympathise with you saying you feel like you've lost everything to anxiety- I feel similar- I used to be one of the most confident people I'd ever met! now I'm a scaredy-cat wreck.

I hope your therapy goes well and that you get some relief.

all the best Flisco