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Meg
12-09-04, 13:06
Does this help to reassure you at all ?

What's worse? Having an anxiety disorder or recovering
from an anxiety disorder? On the surface the answer is
obvious. Yet many anxiety sufferers who improve are haunted
by the "what if" questions. "What if my success is only
temporary?" "What if I relax and enjoy myself and I'm
blindsided by fear?" "What if what seems like improvement
is only an illusion . . . ?"

When the "what if questions" persist, and goad you into
taking them seriously, they can steal from your quality of
life almost as greedily as the anxiety disorder itself.
That's why it's important to have a coping plan to
neutralize them.

For most anxiety sufferers, a good coping plan for living
with "what if" questions will have at least two components.
The first is the recognition that once you've learned to cope
successfully with anxiety, you're not the same person you
were before you were armed with skills and knowledge. Before,
when you didn't know the true nature of anxiety, it seemed
entirely possible that each symptom represented the chance
of something awful. You had no way of knowing that you
weren't likely to end up hospitalized, incapacitated, or
worse. You had no way of knowing that panic and anxiety are
tricksters that don't really represent true danger.

Once you've attained a certain degree of recovery, you know
better. And once you know, there's no way of un-knowing.
You might forget for awhile, but now you face a different
situation than before. Now, if you face a setback, you can
remind yourself of your successes and work to reclaim them.

If anxiety and panic weren't so wily, the first part of the
coping plan would always be enough. But the power of the
"what if questions" is such that they can sometimes override
your first line of defense - reminding yourself of knowledge
and successes. For example, you remind yourself that you've
coped successfully in the past, but then you find yourself
thinking, "True, I coped successfully in the past, but
there's no guarantee that I can do it again." "In fact, it
was only a fluke that I was doing better." You forget that
your symptoms have a long history of predicting catastrophes
that never occur, and start to once again focus on fear: this
time, the fear of losing all your gains and returning to
"square one".

To combat this sort of infiltration of "what if" questions,
you need to see them for what they are: a disguised version
of the same old panic and anxiety trick. In other words,
treating these questions as if they somehow predict real
danger is no different from treating symptoms as if they
represent real danger. Both the questions and the symptoms
are faulty alarms that offer no real information. Likewise,
the fear of "returning to square one" is really no different
than any other harmless fear.

So the next time the "what if questions" pop up, you can see
them for what they are, and even look upon them with amusement,
much the same way you might respond to a persistent child who
attempts ever more creative angles to get his or her way.
Alternately, you can see them as an indicator you might be
experiencing more stress, and use them as a cue to practice
the self-care techniques that you've found to be useful.
Just don't let them trick you into responding as if you just
received advance warning of some terrible danger. Rather,
recognize them for the trick they are.






You can look at it in a different way again .

Choose an athlete that you admire – any one …. Now think about their journey to success and glory. Was it an easy journey, did they just get picked out at school one day and leisurely made their way to the top ?
Its unlikely. Most often they have toiled long and hard to get anywhere near the top of their chosen field and then when they are just about there they often get a bad run of great opponents or possibly an injury and lose their cutting edge ..They must feel as though their world has caved in . So what can they do .

sal
12-09-04, 17:25
Hi Meg

Great post.

Totally agree with what you are saying, it all too easy to let the what ifs take away the good work we have come through to get to where we are today.

I know how easy it is to say i got better last time but this time there are no guarantees and what if i get worst to the point where i cant do it. But like you have rightly pointed out we had the strenght and will power the first time so we should hold on to the hardwork and courage it took and focus on getting through the blips and when we have got through one, recognising that we have gained more experience and are more qualified in our illness to overcome the next blip.

Thanks Meg



Love Sal xxxxx

jill
12-09-04, 18:35
Hi Meg

FAB POST

This post does reassure me, I'm on the road to recovery only because of the reasurance of my doctor and THIS SITE. If i find myself slipping back i will think of this post and all its true contents. You have a great way of putting things and you have helped me alot with this post.

THANKS

:D :D Jill

jo-jo
15-09-04, 10:49
Hi Meg

Well said - amazing post :D

I'm going to print it out and read it each time I get a 'blip' to remind that is exactly what it is and that I can progress.

Thanks Meg, you're a star [^]

Love Jo xxx

buggy999
18-09-04, 12:05
That was a really good post!
However, sorry to be the negative one but with regards to the 'What ifs' thought process... the state of mind that your in when the 'What ifs' start makes it almost impossible (I'd say impossible but nothing is impossible) to disregard these phantom fears... if you anyone has a technique to blocking these thoughts when they start racing I'd truly appreciate hearing it. :D

Caz Fab Pants
18-09-04, 15:48
Meg,

Great post, although a little hard to digest in one go (or was that just me, lol.) Think I'm going to print it out like Jo so I can re-read it when I can concentrate on it more.

Cheers
Caroline :)
x

buggy999
19-09-04, 16:14
I've completely changed me opinion on this post it's brilliant and anyone suffering from Panic and Anxiety should read it twice a day!!!!! [8D]

Meg
20-09-04, 14:07
Glad its been of help .

Meg

jill
16-03-08, 23:04
Hi All. :D

I found this one helped too, again, its an old post, but thought it may help others. There are lots of great replies on these forums, all advice given in priceless, new and old are priceless, :yesyes:

TAKE CARE

LOVE JILLXX

bluesparkle
17-03-08, 09:36
thanks meg!!!
just what i needed to read this morning...
i am on my road to recovery too but having a massive blip at the moment...
but i am not going to let it destroy me like it has done in the past...
it is thanks to this site that i have got where i am now.
but that post was perfect for this morning... i will print it off
rach
x

Paddington
17-03-08, 11:21
wow,boy was i meant to log on today..never seen that post before..and it is perfect for me too bluesparkle as i am feeling like its all going belly up also:scared15: Meg ..you are soooo right ..wish i had a printer..NOPE..CHANGE THAT TO I WILL GET A PRINTER..and print this off.Thanks very much:hugs: Love Paddie.xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx