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missgatsby
19-08-15, 17:53
A lot of people would say that's an oxymoron, but I disagree.

Social anxiety makes it really tough for me to make friends. It's hard for me to believe that someone actually wants to be friends with me... I always feel that they want something. I'm also really nervous about the idea of being alone with someone I don't know very well, because I never know what to talk about. I hate, HATE, awkward silences, but I can't make small talk. It just doesn't feel natural to me.

Introversion goes hand in hand with that. First of all, it's a struggle to even find the right person that I feel I can talk to. When I do make a friend, they, naturally, expect me to hang out and talk to them frequently. I don't feel the same need, and so the friendship either fades, or I end up building resentment towards that person by forcing myself to go out.

I was really close to my family before I moved across the state to live with my boyfriend two years ago. I haven't made any friends, and yet, in a way, I don't want to. I don't want the obligation. I'd love to have a group of people I've known for years and years, and they don't mind if I don't see them all the time, because I see them once in awhile and that's enough.

Is anyone else going through this? It is so great for me just to vent.

Cheesemonster13
19-08-15, 19:47
I'm the same, missgatsby. If I'm really honest, I find other people threatening, and I only feel safe when with my husband or on my own. I try to make an effort to be sociable, but I'm hopeless in company.

Sorry that I can't be more helpful.

mark84
21-08-15, 16:15
Yeah, I'm the same :(

ricardo
21-08-15, 16:28
Regardless of having mental illness issues or not, many people enjoy their own company.Some to a lesser degree than others.

What does your boyfriend feel. Surely he doesn't want you to live in splendid isolation.:)

Us Brits are often said to be reserved and often feel uncomfortable just saying hello to strangers in the street yet in most European countries it's the opposite.

I have no idea where you live in The States but you couldn't get a more diverse country in the western world.

If you really want to make the effort and have casual friends that share some of the same things as you or you and your boyfriend, I am sure you can explore that avenue.