barbie
07-02-07, 11:58
Hi all,
I havent been on here as much recently, but I wanted to share my recent sucesses, as I think it will be good therapy for me to realise that I did cope.
Firstly, a couple of weeks ago, I got a call from an employment agency at 9am saying they had an interview for me and to be there at 10am!
I was so scared, but I went. It was at a huge organisation, and the interview process was pretty tough.
I went in to a meeting room where I had an interview with 2 people. I was doing fine but all of a sudden I started burning up. OHMYGOD I thought, panic attack! I took a massive gulp of water, and one of the interviewers asked if I was ok. I said "Oh I've come over all funny, I feel a bit faint, would you mind if I just nipped to the toilet?" They were fine about it, very concerned, so I went to the toilet and took some deep breaths and went back in and finished my interview!
I was supposed to then have lunch, then do 2 computer tests, but I managed to skip the lunch by saying I still didnt feel well, and went and did the tests, and then came home. I was there for 3 and 1/2 hours in total. I couldnt believe I managed to pass the attack off as illness, but I felt bloody proud of myself! I rang the agency and told them I didnt want the job though!!!! LOL.
Secondly, on Monday I had to go to another city to do a course I have paid £500 to do. It meant getting the train for 1 and 1/2 hours on my own. In the morning I was getting ready and felt ok, then as the time came for my Dad to drop me at the station, a full blown panic attack set in. I was burning up, shaking, crying, couldnt breathe and really did not want to go.
I managed to get myself on the train (next to the toilet just in case!) and it was so packed I couldnt sit down. I had planned to read to take my mind off things.
So I stood up, taking deep breaths and looking out of the window, until half an hour later when a lot of people got off and I managed to get a seat and read a bit.
I started to calm down, and even used the loo, and then got to my destination, got in a taxi and went to the place I was having training at.
Met the others, who were lovely, was still feeling a bit nervous but nothing too bad, when the tutor turned up in tears, absolutly hysterical!
Turns out she has a slipped disk and sciatica, and had had to endure 2 hours in the car. She practically collpased on the floor. It was awful.
It made me realise that Monday morning was as hard for someone else as it was for me.
Needless to say the course was cancelled and I happily skipped into a taxi back to the station, and hopped on a train home without a care in the world!!!! NO ANXIETY.
I left my home at 7.40am, and was back home at 12.30pm. In one piece. I survived. I did it.
I fely bloody knackered afterwards though!!!!:D
Anyway, thats my story.
Carla
"Smile Like You Mean It"
I havent been on here as much recently, but I wanted to share my recent sucesses, as I think it will be good therapy for me to realise that I did cope.
Firstly, a couple of weeks ago, I got a call from an employment agency at 9am saying they had an interview for me and to be there at 10am!
I was so scared, but I went. It was at a huge organisation, and the interview process was pretty tough.
I went in to a meeting room where I had an interview with 2 people. I was doing fine but all of a sudden I started burning up. OHMYGOD I thought, panic attack! I took a massive gulp of water, and one of the interviewers asked if I was ok. I said "Oh I've come over all funny, I feel a bit faint, would you mind if I just nipped to the toilet?" They were fine about it, very concerned, so I went to the toilet and took some deep breaths and went back in and finished my interview!
I was supposed to then have lunch, then do 2 computer tests, but I managed to skip the lunch by saying I still didnt feel well, and went and did the tests, and then came home. I was there for 3 and 1/2 hours in total. I couldnt believe I managed to pass the attack off as illness, but I felt bloody proud of myself! I rang the agency and told them I didnt want the job though!!!! LOL.
Secondly, on Monday I had to go to another city to do a course I have paid £500 to do. It meant getting the train for 1 and 1/2 hours on my own. In the morning I was getting ready and felt ok, then as the time came for my Dad to drop me at the station, a full blown panic attack set in. I was burning up, shaking, crying, couldnt breathe and really did not want to go.
I managed to get myself on the train (next to the toilet just in case!) and it was so packed I couldnt sit down. I had planned to read to take my mind off things.
So I stood up, taking deep breaths and looking out of the window, until half an hour later when a lot of people got off and I managed to get a seat and read a bit.
I started to calm down, and even used the loo, and then got to my destination, got in a taxi and went to the place I was having training at.
Met the others, who were lovely, was still feeling a bit nervous but nothing too bad, when the tutor turned up in tears, absolutly hysterical!
Turns out she has a slipped disk and sciatica, and had had to endure 2 hours in the car. She practically collpased on the floor. It was awful.
It made me realise that Monday morning was as hard for someone else as it was for me.
Needless to say the course was cancelled and I happily skipped into a taxi back to the station, and hopped on a train home without a care in the world!!!! NO ANXIETY.
I left my home at 7.40am, and was back home at 12.30pm. In one piece. I survived. I did it.
I fely bloody knackered afterwards though!!!!:D
Anyway, thats my story.
Carla
"Smile Like You Mean It"