ROCK BOTTOM

[millerlite]

I just got back from the e.r.(again) because of a severe panic attack at work.........I had to leave work earily and wound up shakeing and a complete mess in the hospital.


Me being a 22 year old male I feel robbed of my pride and dignity..

My attacks are always the same fear and that is of a "heart attack" each attack resembles more and more symptoms of a real heart attack...when I go to tell myself it is just a panic attack and to get over it a intense physical symptom grabs me and rips me back into panic...Makeing my serious attacks last for a continuis 8 to 24 hour nightmare![V]

Tonights big(and first ever serious at work) attack started off as a normal attack and made me feel fuzzy headed then immedietly started mocking sytoms of my worst fear a "heart attack"...........I fought the attack useing normal measures of trying to convince myself it was just a panic attack and it hasn't really happend yet so I'm okay.........Then the attack fought back becomeing more physical, left arm went numb, sharp chest pains, feeling of doom, pains in right arm spread to jaw and shoulders, dizzyness.......hardcore waves of panic so intense I had to escape to the bathroom serveral times to collect my thoughts and splash water on my face...At one point my co-worker was getting annoyed at my frequent trips to the bathroom.

As the attack went on to new high levels of panic and discomforts I started to realize that avoiding the doctor and not checking into this stuff may be incredibly dumb........Who is to say I'm not really haveing a heart attack right now? I was struck with terror.."Okay maybe I better take this heart attack thing more serious"(instead of just assumeing it is a panic attack)

So at break I went and checked my blood pressure it showed up 170/98....."Oh my god that can't be good" I thought........shakeing and panicing so bad I could barely sit in the damn chair[B)]!
But I really dont know anything about blood pressure or what it is supposed to be it just seemed high over the normal 140/80 normal mark[?].........So scared out of my mind I went and asked a guy I work with who had a heart attack before...He was such a jerk about it when I told him the results he just looked at me with a blank expression and then started talking about something else........I said "well is that normal or what?" He told me he didn't like the 98 part and said his attack happend only 2 points higher........BAM! PANIC ATTACK FULL BLOW TO THE MAX RIGHT THERE!!.....Then the jerk goes on rambleing about something else and I just turned around and walked away part mad and part scared..

I went to the bathroom (again) and looked in the mirror with a tighter chest and more numbness creeping up and said "Okay light duty for the rest of the night then off to the e.r. right after work"

Well needless to say the panic made it impossible to make it through the night so I left work and headed torwards the e.r.

They pretty much treated it as a panic attack right away....gave me a heart test and it showed up normal, gave me a pain killer and a adivan and sent me home........but here is what freaks me out and I know will cause my next panic attack...............They never told me what was up with that high blood pressure or if it was really high or what their test read[?]


So basically thats just another huge bill that gets me no where and I can't afford to follow up with doctors.........GOD HAVE MERCEY!!

I just needed to vent there guys...I hit the rock bottom hard...How can a panic attack mess with your real health like that?-----If it can do that it can take me out for real with a heart attack% I'd rather be shot, hung, stabbed,hit by a train, jump from a building or even be ripped to shreads by a pack of starving wolfs then ever have a heart attack![xx(] and that even includes a non-deadly heart attack.......I would rather die then have a heart attack.

[ceecee]

hi
please don,t feel like this has robbed you of your dignity and pride,you,d probobly be amazed just how many people suffer from anxiety and panic related disorders.
when you say that you fear a heart attack most that is why your anxiety hits that area!(mine is a fear of something wrong with my brain and so i fear dizzyness,headaches etc!)
your blood pressure is bound to go up a little when you are stressed its the body,s natural reaction
i know its really hard but the only way to stop the panic is to not fear it(but when i know how to do that i,ll let you know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
take care
rach x

[pamella]

i2think im having heart attack when having panic so i can really understand were ur coming from. i was in hospital last year,wit something else not to do wit panic, when i had massive panic, i buzzed for the nurse and told her thought i was dying, she hooked me up2moniters and went of 2 get doctor. he came,my pulse at this time was 130ish so u can imagine state i was in.he told me2lie back and relax that it was panic,oh no thought i.but with a bit of help i did and watched my blood pressure come down, my pulse slow down etc.it was amazing to see how my thinking had effected my pulse etc.they let me keep machine on for a while and id get pain,start to panic and be able2watch my pulse rise, think calmly and c it go down again.it is all to do with r bodies way of coping with fight or flight.im sure u no about that. u should be reassured now that u hav had check up, i no easy said than done.hope u r feeling better2day.

pjrobb

[sal]

I totally understand how you feel mate, thinking about you and you are not alone at all.

Love Sal xx


Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.


"Life is a distance and to travel that distance you were given the strength and guidance to do so".

[millerlite]

Thank you guys all very much. I feel alot better haveing been to the hospital and being able to finally tell my girlfriend and share the story with you guys.

Not sure how I feel about the whole thing.......Mostly depressed at the moment. I think if I could truly rule out the panic of heart attack I would be 80% better. Mainly because there isn't anything I fear more and nothing else could make me panic that much.

I have before had panic attacks of haveing a seizer, and a few other things but once I got on a temperary medicane treatment I did better for years until lately...but none of those attacks before were even close to the physical pain, and intense panic of these ones I have been haveing.

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interesting artical nigel here is what interested me

Conscious thinking and clever reasoning take time. Ugg doesn't have time. And conscious thinking can be distracting too. Ugg doesn't need to be thinking about what to have for dinner, or the argument he had with Mrs Ugg that morning. So conscious thinking and awareness have now been shut down too. Nothing else matters; in fact nothing else exists. It's as if he isn't really there anymore. Ugg is functioning on autopilot – the 'fight or flight' response.

I tried myself to use rational thinking...in fact I stood outside the e.r. for a good 5 minutes trying to tell myself I should just see a Doctor and this isn't the answer. Do you think my trips to the bathroom were the flight response because I had nothing to fight?

[millerlite]

Well I'm finally takeing steps I should have taken a long time ago and I'm going to see a doctor.....Hope he focuses on both my blood pressure and my panic attacks instead of just one or the other..

I will be back to report what is going on.


WISH ME LUCK AND PRAY FOR ME

i will pray for you all[^]

[eddie d]

millerlite /i know this may sound strange .but in a way i was pleased to hear your story ,as it could have been mine ,including the blood pressure thing .since ive started to calm down my blood presure is coming down .
ive been having panic for about 5 years on and off .and am just coming out of it after a year of fear .

[Talisman]

Hey Millerlite,
I'm 22 myself :)
The first time I had a big panic attack I thought I was having a heart attack too. It was horrible, I started freaking out, thinking I should phone an ambulance. I think half the panic is worrying about the whole experience and the feelings. I'm also trying to just think that it's just a panic attack and it'll pass and not harm me. All the same, they're not nice are they :(

[sal]

How did it go at the docs hun?

Thinking about you.

Love Sal xx


Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.


"Life is a distance and to travel that distance you were given the strength and guidance to do so".

[spuds]

Hi Millerlite,

Sorry to hear you are having such a bad time of it at the moment. You are right to get your blood pressure checked out as this will hopefully put your mind at rest. You are very, very young to have heart problems and I'm sure they would have shown up on the monitors at ER. Panic is a terrible thing - I am lucky in that when I do have a panic attack I only get a few symptoms, just a racing heart and feeling dreadful really, no pains. Is there anything that triggers your attacks? Stressful situation at work? Caffeine in coffee or drinks?

When I feel panicky I try to follow the Claire Weekes method which is to let the panic wash over you, don't fight it. She calls it 'floating' past it. Doesn't always work - I had a minor panic attack today in Tesco in a big queue. I felt like my heart was racing, though when I took my pulse it was fine. Our feelings are very deceptive sometimes and it has been a struggle for me to accept that feelings aren't facts and that anxiety is unpleasant but not harmful.

Hope you feel better soon.

[millerlite]

I'm so glad to hear from all you guys, I hope I can figure out this quote thing so I can answer questions and make comments one by one..

But first I must admit the doctor visit wasn't very pleasant:(....I don't have any insurance and can't really afford it at the moment (especially haveing to worry about the e.r. bill) so there was really only one doctor I could afford to see and though he is famous (he was on cnn a few years ago for being an old fashion Dr. and seeing patients for only $5.00 and not takeing appointments or useing computers) I don't think he is caught up on modern mental problems, so I'm affraid I wasn't properly taken care of.

He gave me a very low dose and low amount of valumes to treat my panic attacks, and he took my blood pressure and said it was high but to my relief it had went down alot since what it was that triggered my panic attack that lead to the e.r.

I would rather just pay the extra money to see a real Dr. only problem is I'm not sure if Doctors will take patients without insurance....anyone know?
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<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote"></td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">I don't think the trips to the bathroom are the 'flight' part because there was nothing to 'fight'. It's more like one small part of the whole panic response. It depends on the purpose of the visit .

my response:
I kept going to get away from everyone and try to clear my head...it probably was the flight response because I was becomeing so annoyed by the on and off panic that I was starting to lash out and hit stuff when one struck.........So basically even though I was scared I would of fought something (that was causeing the panic attack) if there was something there to fight.



<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote"></td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">millerlite /i know this may sound strange .but in a way i was pleased to hear your story ,as it could have been mine ,including the blood pressure thing .since ive started to calm down my blood presure is coming down .
ive been having panic for about 5 years on and off .and am just coming out of it after a year of fear .

my response:
I'm glad you overcame yours....I hope I do mine but it doesn't look to promiseing.


<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote"></td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">Hey Millerlite,
I'm 22 myself :)
The first time I had a big panic attack I thought I was having a heart attack too. It was horrible, I started freaking out, thinking I should phone an ambulance. I think half the panic is worrying about the whole experience and the feelings. I'm also trying to just think that it's just a panic attack and it'll pass and not harm me. All the same, they're not nice are they :(

My Response:
your 100% right about all that! It is almost impossible for me to calm myself down if it hits hard..............It just gets too physical. So it is kind of like being extremly paranoid about something and then all a sudden your paranoia comes to life while you are already panicing.

[quote]<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote"></td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote"></blockquote id="quot

[millerlite]

Any thoughts?

[terry]

hope u feeling better millerlite terry

[MasterJPK69]

Hello I to have been suffering with the same thing you ahve for about 6 montyhs also. And everytime i have a panic attach i think it is my heart and i am waiting for the worst to happen i was put on lexapro and it made me so bad one day i went to the er and i like you ahve no insurance but they checked me out and i was fine no problems my bp was a high but it to went down when i started to calm down. i even had blood checked for enzymes and all the stuff and all were fine. they gave me some adevan to calm me down and some pepcid to help my stomach and told me that i should see a counsler and try to get on antidepressants. but i know where you are comming from i have been dealing with this for as long as you have and it scares the hell out of me. since the er the other day i have just been trying to tell my self that it is all anxiety and it will pass and i Have been fine so far for the past few days haveing that doctor reassurance is quit settling. so hang in there friend you will get through it and i am sure you will be fine like i was told on here by someone. who have you known to have a heart attach for weeks or months on end day after day and live? Anyway take care stay calm and try to relax you will be fine trust you doctor.

James

Patience is a Virtue!
Remember good things come to those who wait for them!

[millerlite]

It is good to hear from you guys!

I'm glad there is a place where people care and are supportive about this stuff, in a world where alot of people just think we are over reacting....and that it is all in our head and it should be easy to overcome.

We all know that is not true!

Well anyways I came back to report good news!! Apparently I was wrong to not trust my Doctor when he perscribed me valumes....He told me to take them when I have a panic attack and only then so I don't get addicted and he gave me a very low dose and amount. I thought he was blowing me off and treating me like an addict. So I was about ready to go to another Doctor.

but I decided to give it a shot for financial reasons.

I took one after a intense panic attack and within 15 minutes the attack was gone and so was my anxiety and my blood pressure went down.

I only take them when I need them and I havn't taken them in the last two days!!!:D..........I have had very mild strokes of panic in these last two days but I overcame them on my own so I don't get in the habit of reaching for the pills every time something seems off.

I did have to use them more then once dureing those first 2 days(after getting the pills) but since then my attacks still happen but in very mild and short spurts.

I also bought a home blood pressure kit just to keep an eye on things and put my mind at ease and so far things have been fairly normal. I expect it to be alittle above average because I love greasy food and do smoke ciggs so it naturally wont be perfect but it is no where near the 170/98 it was dureing the peak of the panic attack.........Dureing panic I remember it being as high as 188/111 but since I seen the Doctor it has stayed at around 125/82 or even lower like just a few mins ago it was 119/79.

I will quit smokeing but I'm haveing trouble getting a good start with that and I'm sure I will be useing a nicotine patch so my blood pressure probably wont be perfect for awhile.

I carry my pills on me at all times and it is just a comfort to know they are there.

[ferber]

Don't worry, I've had a rate of 200/xx and that was for several minutes!
That was running, still, don't worry, you are not going to get anything.
If you want a lower heart rate, exersise, take slow joggs.