lifegoeson69
31-08-15, 18:45
I am 19 and at University and have always been anxious but in such a way that would hinder me or my activities ever. When I think about it I remember worrying about little pains in particular crying all night because I had a pain in my thigh that I thought meant something serious. In my first year at University I went through a period of pretty heavily smoking cannabis and after one bad experience I became very aware of my heart and anxious that I was having a heart attack. Ever since then my health anxiety has been bad. It died down towards the end of first year but has really affected my summer holidays and this, combined with meeting my girlfriend (first year university) has just been such a mental toll. About an hour ago I found out a guy I met briefly once my age got cancer back in February and is terminal (he has years left) and it has just really hit me - I feel so hopeless and depressed and of course the health anxiety side of me is selfishly thinking "Gosh what if I have it too". I hate to think like that but I just cannot help it and am now assigning all sensations in my body to cancer.
I want to put down all my worries this summer here for people to mull over and do whatever they want with I just feel it would be good for me to get it all down and you can say whatever about them let me know if you've had similar or what not.
So at the beginning of summer I was okay as far as I remember going back and forth between my girlfriend's and mine. Then one time during sex probably around late June/early July I got these terrible headaches just before orgasm. This happened once then I left it took a break for two weeks and all was well. They happened again once more after two weeks and a bit mildly after that as well but soon subsided once I stopped worrying about it. Of course after the second time they happened I started googling it and read all sorts of things about it. Then one day she was at work and I got the headache exerting myself on a bicycle - I was anxious all day went to A&E with her and got the all clear being told I was just anxious (probably true). I went to my GP when I got home and he said anxiety too and told me not to google and not to worry. After this I was okay - a little worried but getting better. I then got a job working morning shifts 4.30am - noon and got on with this. Of course then I got a cold from the early mornings and the summer change in temperature and my lymph nodes enlarged making me even more worried. I quit the job after 3 days and went to my GP - he said that made complete sense and that I probably had a minor infection. After that all was well all I had was the occasional pain in my neck where I had been prodding and when I got anxious. Since then I've been okay until early August when I fell off my skateboard and hit my head. Of course I worried day and night for about a week and had horrible anxiety tiring me and just draining me mentally. August 18th I went on holiday with my girlfriend and was okay but got a bit anxious in the afternoons because of pains and aches and then hit my head again and literally ruined 2 days of our holiday. Was fine for the rest of it but got home and started worrying that I had a brain tumour for no reason at all and have been getting weird shooting head pains not really pains but seconds of uncomfortableness and almost like contractions. These seem to come from my neck on the right side and kind of radiate up my scalp. Could these be muscular?? I have basically convinced myself that its a tumour in my right shoulder or something. I have had this kind of thing before and it has passed as I've become less anxious but am very worried about it this time.
It all seems coincidental that I have all these symptoms as I am getting more anxious surely?
Does anyone else empathise or have anything similar with the neck/head pains I talked about?? They seemed to get worse on holiday when we would go out to dinner as I was more anxious going out. What do you think?? They seem to be worse in the afternoon too maybe once I start thinking about it over the course of the day?
Feeling low.
I want to put down all my worries this summer here for people to mull over and do whatever they want with I just feel it would be good for me to get it all down and you can say whatever about them let me know if you've had similar or what not.
So at the beginning of summer I was okay as far as I remember going back and forth between my girlfriend's and mine. Then one time during sex probably around late June/early July I got these terrible headaches just before orgasm. This happened once then I left it took a break for two weeks and all was well. They happened again once more after two weeks and a bit mildly after that as well but soon subsided once I stopped worrying about it. Of course after the second time they happened I started googling it and read all sorts of things about it. Then one day she was at work and I got the headache exerting myself on a bicycle - I was anxious all day went to A&E with her and got the all clear being told I was just anxious (probably true). I went to my GP when I got home and he said anxiety too and told me not to google and not to worry. After this I was okay - a little worried but getting better. I then got a job working morning shifts 4.30am - noon and got on with this. Of course then I got a cold from the early mornings and the summer change in temperature and my lymph nodes enlarged making me even more worried. I quit the job after 3 days and went to my GP - he said that made complete sense and that I probably had a minor infection. After that all was well all I had was the occasional pain in my neck where I had been prodding and when I got anxious. Since then I've been okay until early August when I fell off my skateboard and hit my head. Of course I worried day and night for about a week and had horrible anxiety tiring me and just draining me mentally. August 18th I went on holiday with my girlfriend and was okay but got a bit anxious in the afternoons because of pains and aches and then hit my head again and literally ruined 2 days of our holiday. Was fine for the rest of it but got home and started worrying that I had a brain tumour for no reason at all and have been getting weird shooting head pains not really pains but seconds of uncomfortableness and almost like contractions. These seem to come from my neck on the right side and kind of radiate up my scalp. Could these be muscular?? I have basically convinced myself that its a tumour in my right shoulder or something. I have had this kind of thing before and it has passed as I've become less anxious but am very worried about it this time.
It all seems coincidental that I have all these symptoms as I am getting more anxious surely?
Does anyone else empathise or have anything similar with the neck/head pains I talked about?? They seemed to get worse on holiday when we would go out to dinner as I was more anxious going out. What do you think?? They seem to be worse in the afternoon too maybe once I start thinking about it over the course of the day?
Feeling low.