Intense Health Anxiety about my kids

[price1974]

Last August I had a traumatic experience where I learned the child I was carrying would not survive birth and had to terminate for health reasons. I was blindsided and felt helpless and hopeless and that I had no control of any situation. In September I was bombarded with information about childhood cancers as September is Childhood Cancer Awareness month. And the son of a good friend of mine was battling Leukemia. As I was already reeling from my health trauma, this was the perfect storm.
I was convinced my son had a brain tumor as he woke vomiting two nights in a row. I took him to the doctor and she reassured me he was fine.
Since then I have been fixated on my son, 6 and my daughter, 9 that will develop leukemia. I check their bodies EVERY day for bruises and petechia. When they get a new bruise I need to know exactly how it happened to work through the fear in my head. It is horrible! I hate feeling this way!
I check their foreheads every day to see if they have a fever. It is crippling.
I want to take them to the doctor and have a CBC done on both of them to ease my fears but I realize that it is ridiculous to put them through that pain.
Help me!!!

[dally]

I am so sorry for your loss.
You are obviously suffering from PTSD and I would urge you to see your doc with a view to counselling. Perhaps bereavement counselling.
Thinking of you :hugs:

[Fishmanpa]

I'm truly sorry about your loss. With what you've been through and your current level of anxiety over your children, I agree with dally in that counseling would be beneficial.

Positive thoughts

[Pepperpot]

I am really sorry for your loss, and I feel so sorry for you having to go through this. I have started to worry badly in the same way - it is debilitating. You are clearly suffering post traumatic stress and your doctor will be able to advise and help you get better. Please go and see him - you need to for the sake of you and your kids. God bless x

[misslove]

I am sorry for your loss. as a mother with severe anxiety I understand your feelings. I worry about my diagnose way more then I should. But I hide my fears from her because I don't want her to have the same fears and anxiety. I feel if you are always checking your kids you may be instilling fear into them and they will have their own issues with health anxiety. I do think counseling could benefit you. I also know how that feels too, I have been dancing around getting myself into a therapist I just can't find the muster to actually do it. I hope and pray that everything work out for you and your kids. It's a mothers worst fear to have their children be sick and at the end of the day you can only be thankful that they are healthy. Love them with all your heart and live for today.

[Beckie4567]

Sorry for your loss . I no only too well what's its like to worry about your kids its exquasting and worrying.i wish u all the best x