Joeyjangles
15-10-15, 18:17
Hello all,
I've had a few bouts of anxiety over the years and have started feeling a bit yuk lately and find it can really help to write things down, so I'm posting an exert from my online diary today. Maybe someone can relate to my ramblings and there are a couple of affirmations in there that have helped me too...
I have felt wobbly today. Came home from work with a migriane and went to bed. Eyes too sore to watch tele, so just lying there and what should wash over me while all those thoughts are freely running around my head with no filter and guidance from my alert self, but tingly hands and panic attacks. GREAT! Once they start it's very difficult to let them be. I'm just looking over my shoulder checking if they are there and it's a sense of dread, like they can swallow me up whole and take away everything again. I know it's the wrong thing to do is battle with them, but it's like being possessed... the feeling of fear washes over you and you just want to run, but there's no where to run and there's no where to hide. It's pure hell and yes I am still scared of it. Even though I have conquered it in the past and I know you shouldn't run, its going against every instinct in your body. The adrenaline pumps, heart is racing stomach churning, hands tingling and it's a natural reaction to feel that jolt of fear and want to run, so your body pumps out more adrenaline and so it's a cycle. I know the best thing is to not take much notice of it, to let it be there and turn your attention to something else, but it's there shouting and screaming at you to do something to make it go away.
My rational self who knows a bit about anxiety says 'Be with it, they are only thoughts and it is only adrenaline'
I need to nuture, be kind to myself. Let the bad thoughts go and follow the good ones.
Everyone deserves to be happy. I deserve to be happy.
I've had a few bouts of anxiety over the years and have started feeling a bit yuk lately and find it can really help to write things down, so I'm posting an exert from my online diary today. Maybe someone can relate to my ramblings and there are a couple of affirmations in there that have helped me too...
I have felt wobbly today. Came home from work with a migriane and went to bed. Eyes too sore to watch tele, so just lying there and what should wash over me while all those thoughts are freely running around my head with no filter and guidance from my alert self, but tingly hands and panic attacks. GREAT! Once they start it's very difficult to let them be. I'm just looking over my shoulder checking if they are there and it's a sense of dread, like they can swallow me up whole and take away everything again. I know it's the wrong thing to do is battle with them, but it's like being possessed... the feeling of fear washes over you and you just want to run, but there's no where to run and there's no where to hide. It's pure hell and yes I am still scared of it. Even though I have conquered it in the past and I know you shouldn't run, its going against every instinct in your body. The adrenaline pumps, heart is racing stomach churning, hands tingling and it's a natural reaction to feel that jolt of fear and want to run, so your body pumps out more adrenaline and so it's a cycle. I know the best thing is to not take much notice of it, to let it be there and turn your attention to something else, but it's there shouting and screaming at you to do something to make it go away.
My rational self who knows a bit about anxiety says 'Be with it, they are only thoughts and it is only adrenaline'
I need to nuture, be kind to myself. Let the bad thoughts go and follow the good ones.
Everyone deserves to be happy. I deserve to be happy.